I'm through with people.

I know this is off topic but...

Someone needs a time out...

Absolutely through with them. Literally I give up on people. I have a while ago but you know what I give up on those who I even still let in. I'm stupid enough to let them in.

I just LOVE how when someone says something that does in fact come off as insensitive and pretty much implies that they don't give about the other, but when I do show that I'm hurt I'm the one apparently in the wrong. I'm the one who 'needs to come back to my senses' and 'deluded and never thinks it's me' when in fact I do know when I am in the wrong. Even apologize to where I deep down feel I shouldn't have done so, mainly because I cared about this person so they wouldn't be mad at me anymore. But to say that when they flat out even say they don't need people like me, I'm done. I might as well give up on trying. It all went to waste. Not even an apology, just to say I'm deluded.

No, I'm not upset. More like I'm furious. No, not even that. When you even care about these very people and tell them this, this is just what I get. I'm deluded. Yeah, I am. I'm deluded to even care about people to begin with, let alone people that I thought could still be worth that at least. Boy was I wrong. I should've went with my instincts the minute I gave second thought not to do so.


Sorry, but I'm just done. I don't care what type of person you are, I'm not going to give you a chance. I don't expect one or was ever given one so why should I. I found out about the one that I stupidly gave my chances to and I can't give anymore. I just regret doing this and I hope I have the hard heart not to let them back in. I'm done. I'm not the one who's going to come back and say sorry. If that's how it ends then so be it.

And to conclude the whole thing, they figured while saying they're a true friend that they can shove down all the issues I've shared with them at me. I'm so done.

Sitting in the corner now with my teddy bear.

You sound really perplexed. Take a time out.

I understand that sometimes one needs to rant to get rid of the frustration, but consider this

if you are through with people, why are you positing your feelings in a public forum?

Me too! I'm sick of disappointment. These kids of mine don't appreciate anything. Forget them, they don't listen anyway! My wife always thinks she's right no matter how much reason and rationality stack up against her. I'm tired of making other people rich just so they can lay me off when there's a shortage of work. Why does my mom think she can sit around reading and watching tv all day call on me, the father of four with my own place to maintain, for help in her garden? People suck! I'm going to run away and hide in a cave and wait for Jesus. Or maybe I can just take a few breaths, go find a quiet spot and call on the Lord for peace and guidance. Perhaps God is allowing circumstances into my life to prune me and bring me closer to Him. Maybe I need to see this from Jesus perspective and die a little for the sake of others, even when it hurts and nobody sees it now, but maybe later. As I remove myself from the situation emotionally, it will give me a better understanding of others and even my own reactions. Now God is telling me that in this world there will be tribulation, but I have overcome the world. He tells me to let my light shine in the darkness and my patience will be a testament of the Spirit that dwells inside. He says do not let my emotions nullify my testimony. Ahhh, that's better. Thank you Jesus for opening my eyes and reminding me that you loved me when I was unloveable and now call on me to do the same as I represent you Lord. You Lord are my peace and my resting place. May I bless you this day by blessing those who curse me and doing good to those who harm me. Holy is your Name.

Hmm... Sometimes it can be an honor to be kicked around, spit at, pushed aside, trampled over... Because when you what you do for God, as his hands and feet, things suddenly change. Things change because you do it for the one who was literally kicked around, spit at, pushed around, and trampled over... When you do it for Jesus things suddenly change... It suddenly isn't about your feelings anymore but about his kingdom.

I am slowly learning things in life... Expect people to respond to you with anger and hate and jealousy, expect them to build walls and pull out their swords and shields... People are scared and this is the natural response... Not saying I'm perfect because I screw up all the time, it's a learning process... But the question is... What kind of person do you wanna be? Do you wanna respond the same way or do you wanna respond the way Jesus responded... He responded with love. Even as he hung on the cross he responded with love.

And his love reached the most broken people and gave them hope. It takes time to see changes... Takes a lot of devotion with God, fasting, and prayer so that you will spiritually, emotionally and mentally be prepared. But it creates such an amazing journey as Christ shows you what he can do through you to heal the broken hearted.