Kevinsky, I hope that didn't come off as insensitive. What im trying to convey is the enemy's presence most often is through invitation. Focus on the action that is causing this invite and snuff it out.
I offer this prayer for you brother Kevin, pray this with your wife, "Father we ask that you afford us the confidence to approach the enemy and declare through your Son Jesus that the enemy is uninvited and must leave. If it so be that it is beyond the will or strength of either of us to lead Him out, we grant ourselves at your mercy to dig Him out. Amen"
I know that gets kind of raw there at the end but if you are having difficulties to the point of calling out, you have to be able to take your wife's hand and pray that prayer together and lay your souls bare. Ask Him in all His power to dig it out and be ready bc it is gonna surface.
Second phase is keeping the enemy out with effort on your part by repentance of eliminating that invitation or the enemy will go right back in. No one wants to keep having the same surgery over and over, do they. I love you brother. GB