Help me understand.

Why do I still hurt,
Why does God let me hurt.
Five months and some days,
Shouldn't I be over it?
No trust, no nothing,
Just despair and hurt.

I've been kind of far from God lately, not sure how to contact him when I'm hurting, and to be honest, while I trust Him, my trust meter is running near empty. My ex hurt me, with lies and thievery, and he broke me and now, I don't know how to heal. I respond when he texts(because I hate hurting him more after everything, I pray for him, but it's still so hard, because to top off that, I'm losing "close" friends to him, because they don't like a friendship I have. So I ask, why does He want me to hurt so much? How much sadness, anger and hurt can one person handle before doing something stupid? I need prayer and I need help.

Put your eyes away from men and from what men are doing. We do not have the mind of God. He is sovereign God, creator of the universe. Jesus Christ came surrendering to His Father's will though it crushed His spirit and broke His heart.

Philipians 2:5-11
5 Let this mind be in you which was also in Christ Jesus, 6 who, being in the form of God, did not consider it robbery to be equal with God, 7 but made Himself of no reputation, taking the form of a bondservant, and coming in the likeness of men. 8 And being found in appearance as a man, He humbled Himself and became obedient to the point of death, even the death of the cross. 9 Therefore God also has highly exalted Him and given Him the name which is above every name, 10 that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, of those in heaven, and of those on earth, and of those under the earth, 11 and that every tongue should confess that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father.


Is God not your Father? Is Jesus Christ not your shepherd? Did He not give His life for you?


John 10:4-18

4 I am the good shepherd; and I know My sheep, and am known by My own. 15 As the Father knows Me, even so I know the Father; and I lay down My life for the sheep. 16 And other sheep I have which are not of this fold; them also I must bring, and they will hear My voice; and there will be one flock and one shepherd.
17 “Therefore My Father loves Me, because I lay down My life that I may take it again. 18 No one takes it from Me, but I lay it down of Myself. I have power to lay it down, and I have power to take it again. This command I have received from My Father.”


HE LOVES YOU!!! He loves you more than anyone ever could!! He wants you to be with Him forever!!! He did everything in His hand to be with you. He wanted you to be with Him so badly that He would've rather died (and He did) than to be without you!!! Trust your savior. Your life is His, it doesn't belong to you anymore. It's not about us. He bought our lives with a price, and what a price He paid!! Who are we to doubt Him after all He's done? He is God almighty! Trust in the God who created the universe and who gave up His majesty just to be with you. That is the God who loves you eternally!

Trust and look to Jesus.
When God is removing the flesh from us, it does hurt, ussually because we keep clinging to it.
Rest and trust in Jesus with praise and thanksgivng.
I now this sounds like the ussual sayings, but I want you to know that I witness to the glory of God here, simply because I thought the same about all the ussual sayings.
Then I was humbled and praised Jesus, God Our Father.
Trully His glory and love poured out upon me, and He lifted me out of the muck and mire.
Its not always about what we want, it is better, for Jesus always brings what we need.
You are in my prayers in Jesus.

Hugs and God bless
pickles

Little one, you will not understand this with eyes of flesh. Only with spiritual eyes (understanding) can spiritual things be discerned.
This is difficult to do when we are deep in the valley, but the One Who knows you and saved you can do it for you!
We can do nothing (John 15:5), but nothing is impossible for Him (Ephesians 3:20!).

But even if you should suffer for what is right, you are blessed. 1 Peter 3:15

They think it strange that you do not plunge with them into the same flood of dissipation, and they heap abuse on you. 1 Peter 4:4

Dear friends, do not be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice that you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed. If you are insulted because of the name of Christ, you are blessed, for the Spirit of glory and of God rests on you. If you suffer, it should not be as a murderer or thief or any other kind of criminal, or even as a meddler. However, if you suffer as a Christian, do not be ashamed, but praise God that you bear that name. For it is time for judgment to begin with the family of God; and if it begins with us, what will the outcome be for those who do not obey the gospel of God? And,“If it is hard for the righteous to be saved,
what will become of the ungodly and the sinner?”
So then, those who suffer according to God’s will should commit themselves to their faithful Creator and continue to do good. 1 Peter 4:12-19


I pray these scriptures will bless and help you, child of God. ♥
Seek the Savior...He's the only One who will never let you down. This is why we cannot look to men, not even to one another, though we are called to bear one another's burdens, and so we do in prayer for you, since we can't be with you where you are. Yet, we love you, little one! With the love of Christ.

~ellie

I just call out... "Daddy I need you! Your love and your wisdom!"
(When I want to feel closer to God)
Just call out to him like a child and He will come to be by your side.

Psalm 89:26
“He shall cry to Me, ‘You are my Father, My God, and the rock of my salvation.”

Romans 8:15
“So you have not received a spirit that makes you fearful slaves. Instead, you received God’s Spirit when he adopted you as his own children. Now we call him, Abba, Father.”

1 John 3:1
“See what kind of love the Father has given to us, that we should be called children of God; and so we are. The reason why the world does not know us is that it did not know him.”

Luke 18:17
Truly I tell you, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it.”

Mark 10:15
Truly I tell you, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it.”

He wants to lead, teach, love and protect us...you just need to have the heart of a child...willing and yearning to learn from him.
( An open mind and heart...just like a child.)

I can quote scripture in hopes of making you feel better but the truth is, you are the one allowing yourself to hurt not God. You are clinging to something you know should end.

The Lord will help you when you allow Him in your heart to help. If you go against something He is telling you to do (such as end communication with your ex), then you are not willing to let him heal your heart.

I too put myself through suffering and hurt over another person (I did this for 6 years). It wasn't until I decided to change the path I was on that I heard what the Lord was saying to me.

So I guess the question is not "How long will God allow me to hurt?", it should be "How long will I go on hurting myself before I listen to what God wants for me?".

Give yourself over to the Lord. Pray reverently for an open heart to His guidance. Once you allow the Lord to lead your life rather than yourself, your hurt will slowly start to go away until it is no more.

I will pray for peace in your life.

God Bless.

Sweetbear, you asked these questions
Why do I still hurt, Why does God let me hurt. Five months and some days, Shouldn't I be over it? No trust, no nothing, Just despair and hurt.
After my husband left a little more than two years ago, it was the most painful experience that I have experienced. I can not even begin to imagine what you are going through. I know now that God knew what I was going through, He knew one day I will be grateful that I did came through such time. I surrender my life to Him a year after my husband left. God started healing my heart and at the same time things started falling into place. The transformation that happens to my life is a miracle. I do not blame my husband for leaving me for another lady. I am grateful for the 21 years that we have been together for and the 6 children that we have been blessed with. I have forgiven my husband and I do love him but with God's love. I am grateful that I I have every opportunity to stand in the gap for him. I do not pray for him to come home. I pray that he too will experience God's love, forgiveness and mercy the was I do. I see him as a lost soul that is in need of God's love and forgiveness.

I realized that the reason why I was deeply hurt and in despair, because I felt that I was being treated unfairly by my husband. I felt that my life worth nothing and that I am unloved and unwanted and if my husband does not love me anymore than who can. The kind of mentality that I used to have was destroying me from inside out. All these negativety comes from the devil and not from God. After I surrender my life to God, I started falling in love with God's word and from there, I know who I am in Christ. I am precious in God's eyes and that He has a plan for my life, a plan for good and not for evil, a plan to give me hope and a future. I did not struggle to be healed, it just happens in my walk with Christ. Even myself often surprised that I can now meet and talk to my husband as if we were never separated.

I can only encourage you to draw near to God and He will draw near to you.

I hate to hear of your sorrow, but Romans 8:28 I believe says Jesus works all things together for good to those that love him. DOESN'T mean all things are good. Maybe he is looking for you to put your faith in him. Anyway it maybe tomorrow, next week, but soon you will wake up and life will have changed for the better. Keep your head high, your faith in Jesus, and everything will work out just fine

A few years ago I also went thru a bad breakup I thought I would not be able to move on. I even thought I should just probably decide to remain single as all men are the same - they will just hurt women one way or the other. Apparently God meant it for my good. After that ex boyfriend, God brought a fine, loving gentleman to my life. He's now my husband for almost 5yrs.
I believe God removes things from us, prunes us, or allows us to go through fiery trials so He can bless us with the life He's meant for us. He cuts the branches from our lives that prevents us from bearing fruit and of course that hurts! It is hard to see that while you are in pain. But I pray that more than anything, may you decide to surrender everything to God. Stop trying to figure out what to do and all the why's because it will only confuse and hurt you all the more. Rest in His love. Some of the things that help me when Im really really down would be listening to Christian/worship music, listening to uplifting podcast preachings, seek counselling from mature Christian friends or leaders, or just go out or go somewhere and let the beauty of nature speak of God's love and greatness
Arise, Sweetbear! God has His best intentions for you. You might not see it now but I pray that you keep trusting His love for you. He is the one who never ever fails. Decide to let go and turn back from the things you know in your heart isnt right. And in everything, let God guide you. His strength be upon you today and always.

Sorry.

You are a lot stronger than you imagine, and if you accept God's unconditional love, your faith will see you through.

God bless

I'm so sorry you are in despair, sweetbear. I know how miserable it is to feel like no one cares and especially thinking that God doesn't care.

But God does care...VERY MUCH. We are a fallen people living in a fallen world where pain and suffering happens. God didn't originally create us or the world this way; we lost paradise because we didn't trust God and wanted to do things our own way. We are all in rebellion against God until we can bend our knee to Him.

Seek God first. Not for the things that He can provide for you but seek a sincere relationship with Him. Doing things His way is how we find contentment in this life.

Praying for strength and guidance for you .