R
I can barely concentrate on life anymore, and enjoying life. I have no motivation to do anything, even things I like. There is always a fear there. A constant lingering fear. The thing I'm scared of will change, but it is always something. The latest one is I get scared that I am somehow sinning or not turning to God if I find some ways to be happy by using my imagination to creatively help my psychology, like I did when I was a kid, or self-help books that have helped me in the past...instead of looking to God or reading the bible. (I don't even know who God is, so how can I know He didn't bless me with imaginative tools to feel better here in this fleshy brain of mine?).
I feel anxious inside when I read the bible. Aside from the fact that much of it confuses me, my paranoid mind translates the words as the bible yelling at me personally and saying negative things that contradict other wonderful things in that same bible.
I feel anxiety when I pray, because I suddenly worry if I am saying it right, and feeling it right, then I worry that my worrying will make my willpower cancel out my wanting to be healed, and because God won't interfere with my willpower I'll stay sick...
My body and mind have some health issues, I don't feel comfortable talking about specifics, except that I need some prayers for my eyes and vision and metabolism. Please pray for me. I want to feel better again and I don't know what else to do, I'm so worried. Every doctor visit has been painfully disappointing, and my mom told me that God told her that His love can heal me, not the doctors. I want to believe this so badly.
I feel anxious inside when I read the bible. Aside from the fact that much of it confuses me, my paranoid mind translates the words as the bible yelling at me personally and saying negative things that contradict other wonderful things in that same bible.
I feel anxiety when I pray, because I suddenly worry if I am saying it right, and feeling it right, then I worry that my worrying will make my willpower cancel out my wanting to be healed, and because God won't interfere with my willpower I'll stay sick...
My body and mind have some health issues, I don't feel comfortable talking about specifics, except that I need some prayers for my eyes and vision and metabolism. Please pray for me. I want to feel better again and I don't know what else to do, I'm so worried. Every doctor visit has been painfully disappointing, and my mom told me that God told her that His love can heal me, not the doctors. I want to believe this so badly.