I went for a walk. I was going to carry a backpack, but I got a sensation not to bring it.
I was going to take some books and paper and work on devotions at a local pastry shop.
But I knew it was against my current goal for health and money management.
Still, I took a few dollars, for whatever I might encounter.
What I encountered was a freeing feeling, a moment of true intimacy with my infinite creator.
It began with honesty, default prayers from the Bible. Then it became here and there prayers for
different people, then it eventually became a time to listen.
Listen. Listen. Listen.
It is hard for someone who always listens for notes and oncoming traffic around corners. It is hard for someone who has sooo many questions and is just as lacking in being still to listen to the invisible Lord's direction. Still, God spoke into the quasi-quiet. And as a result, faith began to grow during the walk.
I found myself wanting what I had prayed as a default before.
I found myself saying, "If the man is there, then I will enter the shop, because I want to hear his testimony. If the woman is there, then I will keep walking." Well, I saw the woman, so-- today-- I walked on.
As I made my way up the one way climb for cars I began to pray for someone close to me. And I wondered if we would be brought together. Of if we would never be so close again. But even as I wondered in honesty, I said, echoing elder saints in my life, "No, you've got to have faith."
Before I continue on this... a flashback.
I asked the Lord for a sign for clarity. The sign was for the person's name to be seen during what would be a two hour walk.
As much as I kept my eyes open, or closed in prayer, as much as I wandered the streets in a walk seeking and trusting God's will could match my request-- I made it back to place without "seeing" the sign for clarity.
However, I did notice that the person with whom I spoke, just feet away from my door, that the name was a shared name.
And on a previous day, even then, I noticed a business card with the visible "sign." So... even though I did not "see" the sign as I wanted... I did chalk it up as, "Yes, I got the answer."
End flashback.
I had just prayed. "Lord, forgive me of any deceit or stretching to see my will be done. I now know my mistake. I do pray that you help each of us. Help her to succeed and..." "And if you never bring us together again, then..." And that is when I mustered faith to believe God could/would bring us together.
And within about 20 steps up that sidewalk, dead straight in front of me, in LARGE lettering, there was sign I had desired months ago. I mean, the letters were visible, well-lit, and in my face. I saw them, not for my will, but out of the faith God had implanted.
I walked to the end of the parking-lot, where I could only sit on a wall and thank God. And I meditated on what it might mean. The timing of this was better than a movie script! I was brought to tears.
However, just as scripture talks about having faith, it tells us to test each spirit and to be wise.
As my time from months ago reveals, as well as every day
, I am not great in discernment.
Therefore, Even with a glaring and literal sign before me, I remembered how the devil tempted Jesus when talking about stones becoming bread. I asked, "Lord, is this this a stone or a sign?"
I then thought about how Abram's dad was on his way to what would be called the promised land, but how he stopped prematurely. And I wondered, as good as this, maybe there is more beyond this. So, after some time of leaning on steps at a church or type of courthouse, remembering the scene from the Luther movie, I got up and I walked up the hill, leaving one blessing for an unknown one.
This will sound cheesy, as if the rest were not already. The blessing I encountered was jovial singing to the Lord, as I walked in against the brisk morning air. And the first song that I recall singing was, "I surrender all." "Lord, even if you give everything and everyone, as I've desired with the most pure of motives. It is nothing without You. Even my greatest most cherished dream, it is yours." And then I proceeded to sing a medley of songs, tunes, and made-up lyrics.
Well, the walk was longer than I should write, so...
In short, my testimony is that God met me in a special way.
My discernment is likely off, one way or another.
But the blessing of truly hearing God, meditating on His word while on a walk,
it is freeing.
The moral:
God cares more than we carry. Keep walking with Him.
--IDEA
I was going to take some books and paper and work on devotions at a local pastry shop.
But I knew it was against my current goal for health and money management.
Still, I took a few dollars, for whatever I might encounter.
What I encountered was a freeing feeling, a moment of true intimacy with my infinite creator.
It began with honesty, default prayers from the Bible. Then it became here and there prayers for
different people, then it eventually became a time to listen.
Listen. Listen. Listen.
It is hard for someone who always listens for notes and oncoming traffic around corners. It is hard for someone who has sooo many questions and is just as lacking in being still to listen to the invisible Lord's direction. Still, God spoke into the quasi-quiet. And as a result, faith began to grow during the walk.
I found myself wanting what I had prayed as a default before.
I found myself saying, "If the man is there, then I will enter the shop, because I want to hear his testimony. If the woman is there, then I will keep walking." Well, I saw the woman, so-- today-- I walked on.
As I made my way up the one way climb for cars I began to pray for someone close to me. And I wondered if we would be brought together. Of if we would never be so close again. But even as I wondered in honesty, I said, echoing elder saints in my life, "No, you've got to have faith."
Before I continue on this... a flashback.
I asked the Lord for a sign for clarity. The sign was for the person's name to be seen during what would be a two hour walk.
As much as I kept my eyes open, or closed in prayer, as much as I wandered the streets in a walk seeking and trusting God's will could match my request-- I made it back to place without "seeing" the sign for clarity.
However, I did notice that the person with whom I spoke, just feet away from my door, that the name was a shared name.
And on a previous day, even then, I noticed a business card with the visible "sign." So... even though I did not "see" the sign as I wanted... I did chalk it up as, "Yes, I got the answer."
End flashback.
I had just prayed. "Lord, forgive me of any deceit or stretching to see my will be done. I now know my mistake. I do pray that you help each of us. Help her to succeed and..." "And if you never bring us together again, then..." And that is when I mustered faith to believe God could/would bring us together.
And within about 20 steps up that sidewalk, dead straight in front of me, in LARGE lettering, there was sign I had desired months ago. I mean, the letters were visible, well-lit, and in my face. I saw them, not for my will, but out of the faith God had implanted.
I walked to the end of the parking-lot, where I could only sit on a wall and thank God. And I meditated on what it might mean. The timing of this was better than a movie script! I was brought to tears.
However, just as scripture talks about having faith, it tells us to test each spirit and to be wise.
As my time from months ago reveals, as well as every day
, I am not great in discernment.Therefore, Even with a glaring and literal sign before me, I remembered how the devil tempted Jesus when talking about stones becoming bread. I asked, "Lord, is this this a stone or a sign?"
I then thought about how Abram's dad was on his way to what would be called the promised land, but how he stopped prematurely. And I wondered, as good as this, maybe there is more beyond this. So, after some time of leaning on steps at a church or type of courthouse, remembering the scene from the Luther movie, I got up and I walked up the hill, leaving one blessing for an unknown one.
This will sound cheesy, as if the rest were not already. The blessing I encountered was jovial singing to the Lord, as I walked in against the brisk morning air. And the first song that I recall singing was, "I surrender all." "Lord, even if you give everything and everyone, as I've desired with the most pure of motives. It is nothing without You. Even my greatest most cherished dream, it is yours." And then I proceeded to sing a medley of songs, tunes, and made-up lyrics.
Well, the walk was longer than I should write, so...
In short, my testimony is that God met me in a special way.
My discernment is likely off, one way or another.
But the blessing of truly hearing God, meditating on His word while on a walk,
it is freeing.
The moral:
God cares more than we carry. Keep walking with Him.
--IDEA
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