Hey Everyone,
I'm giving credit for this thread idea to Hoss because one of his old threads gave me an idea that's been churning in my head a few months.
Do we have differing opinions about those who have been married more than once vs. those who have had more than one relationship? Why? And how does it affect our view of them as far as being a potential spouse for ourselves or someone else?
I know these aren't the best examples but they're the most prominent ones I can think of right now. When I think of this subject, two very specific people come to mind: George Clooney and Elizabeth Taylor. George is well-known for dating a long string of beautiful women over the years, and just recently married for the first time.
Elizabeth, on the other hand, was heavily criticized for being married 8 times (twice to the same person and yes, I realize her relationships weren't under the best circumstances). I read an interview with her once in which she was asked (as she was always asked this) why she had been married so many times and she replied that she was old-fashioned and raised to believe in getting married, not just exist in a relationship, so when she fell in love, she insisted on getting married.
I do know that these are two worldly examples and that there are also several other dynamics to consider--society will generally view a woman who has been through multiple relationships/marriages in a much more negative light than a man--but I am wondering what you as Christians think about this topic.
Who would you judge more harshly--the person who has been married twice (and is now divorced, and let's say their spouse abandoned them each time for someone else) or the person who has been in 5 relationships? Who is more eligible to marry?
And let's be real. I suppose part of this has to do with sex. If someone has been married twice, you know they've been with at least 2 people. If someone has been in 6 relationships and not slept with anyone, I can certainly see why this situation would be judged less harshly. But what if another person has been in 10 relationships (which, at my age, isn't uncommon these days, even for Christians) and has slept with all 10 people? Does your viewpoint then change? How? And why? Are they all they automatically disqualified for marriage are some more "worthy" than others?
I find it interesting because I myself am divorced (he married another woman) and have found in the dating world that being divorced is definitely considered a MUCH worse sin than having been in relationships with multiple people, even if sex was involved in those unmarried relationships. I'm always... intrigued... to meet men (I'm not bashing anyone here, but speaking from my experience as a woman) who have slept with more women than they can count but will not "taint" themselves with someone divorced.
I know all the Bible passages that will be quoted here about "whoever married the divorced woman commits adultery", but it's interesting to me then that the person who may have only been with their marriage partner is automatically, for any reason, crossed off the list, while the one who has had sex with multiple people, even in long-term relationships, is seen to be perfectly eligible for marriage...
What are your thoughts?
I'm giving credit for this thread idea to Hoss because one of his old threads gave me an idea that's been churning in my head a few months.
Do we have differing opinions about those who have been married more than once vs. those who have had more than one relationship? Why? And how does it affect our view of them as far as being a potential spouse for ourselves or someone else?
I know these aren't the best examples but they're the most prominent ones I can think of right now. When I think of this subject, two very specific people come to mind: George Clooney and Elizabeth Taylor. George is well-known for dating a long string of beautiful women over the years, and just recently married for the first time.
Elizabeth, on the other hand, was heavily criticized for being married 8 times (twice to the same person and yes, I realize her relationships weren't under the best circumstances). I read an interview with her once in which she was asked (as she was always asked this) why she had been married so many times and she replied that she was old-fashioned and raised to believe in getting married, not just exist in a relationship, so when she fell in love, she insisted on getting married.
I do know that these are two worldly examples and that there are also several other dynamics to consider--society will generally view a woman who has been through multiple relationships/marriages in a much more negative light than a man--but I am wondering what you as Christians think about this topic.
Who would you judge more harshly--the person who has been married twice (and is now divorced, and let's say their spouse abandoned them each time for someone else) or the person who has been in 5 relationships? Who is more eligible to marry?
And let's be real. I suppose part of this has to do with sex. If someone has been married twice, you know they've been with at least 2 people. If someone has been in 6 relationships and not slept with anyone, I can certainly see why this situation would be judged less harshly. But what if another person has been in 10 relationships (which, at my age, isn't uncommon these days, even for Christians) and has slept with all 10 people? Does your viewpoint then change? How? And why? Are they all they automatically disqualified for marriage are some more "worthy" than others?
I find it interesting because I myself am divorced (he married another woman) and have found in the dating world that being divorced is definitely considered a MUCH worse sin than having been in relationships with multiple people, even if sex was involved in those unmarried relationships. I'm always... intrigued... to meet men (I'm not bashing anyone here, but speaking from my experience as a woman) who have slept with more women than they can count but will not "taint" themselves with someone divorced.
I know all the Bible passages that will be quoted here about "whoever married the divorced woman commits adultery", but it's interesting to me then that the person who may have only been with their marriage partner is automatically, for any reason, crossed off the list, while the one who has had sex with multiple people, even in long-term relationships, is seen to be perfectly eligible for marriage...
What are your thoughts?