Hi Porcelain, I don’t know what you’ve been going through right now, but saying you want to give up, that’s really something.
I always hear people around me saying, I’m someone who doesn’t have any problem, since they always saw me as a happy person, but that just made me smile and said to myself, if they only knew…
I never had an easy life, and I even felt, God let me feel all the pain already as I grow.
There was even one point I was begging God with tears not to let it happen to our family (almost 4 years now), and said if He will, I won’t be going to church anymore, cuz I just couldn’t pretend that everything is fine, but it happened.
I was so restless the whole night and just can’t stop crying, and I keep this lyrics from a song Trust His Heart…” God is too wise to be mistaken, God is too good to be unkind, So when you don’t understand, when you don’t see His plan, when you can’t trace His hand, Trust His heart” …and yea I’ve been singing that while crying.
But what funny thing is, when Sunday came , I just find myself singing in the church and when I remembered what I said , I just smiled and said to Him that I just couldn’t give Him up.
I never asked God why those things need to happen but I always said what lesson you want me to learn on this. A lot of times, I don’t understand why, but that never let me doubt His love for me.
Just keep holding on to Him, that’s the best thing you can do for yourself, for in Him only, you will find peace and strength that you need.
I may say everything is fine now…
Just remember this…God loves you more than anyone could ever love you as you really are.
He might break you into pieces, but that’s for Him, to make a better you.
Cheer up!
I’ll be praying for you.