My dad is a logging contractor, done a lot of land development for the state of Washington, all over, had crews, etc. Great guy, great dad, horrible boss. Until....
When I was 18, fresh out of high school, I began working for dear ole dad. I ran a skidder, that's a big CAT tractor with 40" high rubber tires instead of tracks like a bulldozer. A skidder is used to either grab logs with a grapple or used chokers, I've used both, it's tough work but both are fun to do, hopping on and off a skidder or using hydraulic controls to go along an acreage of fell trees and pick them up in an efficient pattern, sweeping the area. Anyway, when I started out, it was choker skidder logging for me, and, I struggled. Did I ever !
On a typical day, I was bringing in around 1/2 load of logs to the landing, where the log truck loader used a boom to pick up the logs and put them in a log truck. So, yeah, you probably seen that reality show tv stuff on now of Timberjacks, skidding, falling trees, using machines to fall trees I call 'feller-bunchers,' etc, anyway, yeah, well, praise God, I LIVED it ! It was fun when I finally was good at it, but that took a long time. I worked for dad before going off to college my freshman year, then, I didn't work for him again until I was age 22. I worked hard, it was not that I was not trying, I was not understanding and dad's constant negative way of trying to help me was never helping me. He never said positive, encouraging things of the way I was skidding and it was NO FUN! I went a year straight , maybe, even a year and a half, of doing that same 1/2 load skidded into the landing per day, maybe, I was up to 1 load on my best days. But, yeah, I knew that I could do better and I knew what I needed to do to get better.....
One day, I was out on a job, zooming in and over stumps, doing ultimate 4-wheeling
, hooking up logs with chokers, dragging them into the landing, when I was still, because of my dad's way of talking to me all the time on the job--negatively!--not having fun at all, in fact, I was so upset at my dad that I blew up at the end of a workday when he once again came into my face, yelling at the way I was doing things wrong.
"You don't do things like that, son, you are making a lot more work for yourself by doing it that way," he said, or, something close to it, because that's how he ALWAYS talked to me.
So, I finally had had it , and, I blew up in my dad's face about two hours shy of the 10 hour workday's completion, for really the first time ever in front of my dad, I'd kept my feelings completely inside until NOW .
"I am sick and tired of all your negativity all the time telling me things, never positive, never, NEVER,
NEVER . I'm not just walking off the job now today, and, not coming back, I am never going to speak to you again if you can't show me some positiveness in your negative criticism to me all day long !!!"
That was it, I hopped off the skidder, grabbed my lunchpail and walked right to my truck and left.
Dad called me a day or two later, when I didn't show up for work, and, said, 'Son, I have a hard time being postive, I am trying to teach you the best way I know how."
That was it. Dad never even said he would change, I didn't need him too, that there was the end of the problem and I did begin to skid more logs per day, and, my $10 per hour pay went straight to $20 per hour, because I was then skidding 4-5 log truck loads to the landing per day.
Guys, IF you have a problem with your dad right now, first, go to God, and, I know, I did not mention God in this story, there's a reason for that, I was not real close to God at this time, I wish I would have, I would have not waited what was an excruciating year and a half to talk to my dad about how he treated me on the job, verbally abusing me, as I saw it.
The strange thing too, and, maybe, why dad did not have to give much apology is that off the job dad was soooo different, he was a great dad, we did things together, he NEVER yelled at me. It was just on the job that his personality was 180 degrees different from real life with him. But, it began eating away at me and I'm sure God was there, I'd accepted Him when I was 14 and He was trying to get my backslidden self back to Him, and, I never did leave God, was just lukewarm so I was spit out and having to work out that I did not want that relationship with God and my changed, positive relationship with my dad did lead to better life things, as I remember now, once I boldly came before my dad and released my frustrations. I felt so good, so good ! after having done that expulsion of emotion on the job, do NOT hold it in there, guys, bring it to h(H)im