you're worrying is not going to help yourself or anyone, and mothers and evil women do this because they are jealous of their young daughters and those who have made better choices than they have.
so, if someone loves you truly they will not cause you mental anguish over parts of yourself that you feel unhappy with.
i've been on here for about a couple weeks now, because i was a christian, and became stronger in my faith and withstanding how my family abuses me, uses me, and lets negative influences come into this house, and it has destroyed me.
so, i am at the point, where I realize that i may never have happiness, acceptance, gladness in my work, or have others truly trust me, rather than just giving my knowledge and letting them decide what they will use for themselves.
i have given up on myself and on the world. since birth, my mother has been in control of this whole neighborhood, and though i have been a good child, i have been criticized, condemned, harmed, and tempted beyond what I can bear.
They destroyed my faith, and it has caused me to become something i am not happy with, i feel a sense of wanting to do harm to them. When in reality it says that vengenance is mine thus saith the Lord.
Well, the Lord only works through us, so at what point will they stop acting so upitty and realize what they have done. I have repented and done what they asked to make them feel better, but now they have done nothing.
In my heart it brings me peace, that they will never be christians because of what they have done to me. But it also makes me sad who I have become because of them.
There are grown men in this neighborhood who are unhappy with their wives, women who their only desire is to have babies, and make youth jealous of them, I often feel like I am living in the truman show or the twilight zone.
So, please you are young, and you still have strength. A good man will work with you to acheive common goals realizing that both of you do not really want to die before old age.
So, this is what I have to give, maybe you can pray for me.
Because I have been heartbroken and struggling very much because I don't have money or a husband, although I would like and need both, but the world's ways of doing things are insane.
Everyone thinks this is some game, well the games others play are not always good and fun, for others.
And I wish that the neighbors would just keep to themselves.
You have a whole life ahead of you. And may your dreams and goals be always available at the right time, though you may get disappointed or rejected, may you always rise again.
The culture and the spirit of this place is so lowly. The only thing people here do is drink, eat, smoke, do drugs, and have sex, wasting energy. And contributing nothing good to anyone.
They still haven't realized the real me, and don't understand that I don't want to be known.
Because I do love God, and I do love others, as I am equipped to do so.
I have been cursed by the Pasadena boys that my parents are always supposed to take care of me, and that they are gods and good persons.
But they are not and no one sees the truth. they would gladly kill me, their own child, that they dearly wanted at birth. If they didn't pull out a gun to shoot me, they would gladly gladly destroy any safety or any protection I had in this world.
Yet God allows the good and the bad to survive.
And things have happened for me before I was ready, and when it was time for me to be married and be a career woman it never happened.
So, I pray that you know yourself well enough to walk through life correctly, and that if you fall, the right provision would come along at the right time.
There is nothing I can do to stop evil in this house, because it is this woman's home, who in my mind is no long my mother,
I have had others come into my life, Thank God, and try to help and save me, and say I don't understand why they are doing this to you, you are a grown woman, not a young girl.
So, I pray that others do not judge you, unless of course you like it and it brings motivation or energy to you.
I pray that others see you for what you really are, and when something needs changing that they will do the right thing to get you along your way.
And if my experiences and what has been done to me, and these blessings don't help you, then I am sorry, but it is from my heart, and my mind, and my spirit.
So, if you ask well what can I do for her.
What you can do, is spread the word that pasadena, maryland, baltlimore is not a good place to come to.
They will oppress you and keep you as a child forever.
Spread your wings and live!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I still have some hope that one day I will escape these abusive men and women, who think have hatred and are uncomfortable with someone who can't do the same things as them or who doesn't want to, or because they are going through trials, insist that you join in their perversion and their wrongness.
I thought America was a normal place. Even third world countries have more love and care inside them then this town.
Learn, love, and marry if you choose.
And just know that appearances are not always true. You may have known someone your're whole life, and then in the blink of an eye they turn on you and you realize the life you spent on them was for nothing and they used you and didn't even care about your survival.
I don't want to scare you. But maybe this is the right thing you need to hear at this time.
Too meny men especially are very selfish. The only thing they want is children and to get their wives pregnant. Their is more to this world than that. There are already too many of us living on the earth.
And when your parents, friends, teachers, whomever is getting irritated with you or thinks you are not at the right place in your life, they will often do things to pressure you into something you may or may not want to do.