Is this bad?

[88]

I always hear that Christians need each other, and I believe that to be true. I think the body of Christ is beneficial and there for a reason. Besides the fact that it is Biblical.

Maybe it's because I'm really only slightly starting to get "back on track" with God here recently, but I just don't feel the desire to connect with other Christians? I've been going to church, and I tried out a young adult group once. It's a fairly intimidating group as their get togethers I see on Facebook are 25+ people at a time. To an introvert, that's a lot. The other problem is that my church is 20+ minutes from my house. I think to really get involved, I would need to find a church in my town, which is a small town. There are some I might try out that would make getting involved easier.

But I digress.

I own a home, have three pets, am 20 minutes away from my job, and also work a second job (though it is part time and done from home), so my weeknights are pretty scheduled and it's hard to really do anything because that would require going back into town and that drive alone would be an hour. Weekends I tend to save for projects and myself (such as painting, house things, hiking, etc) or spending some time with current friends I have.

I guess what it boils down to is, I have no desire to do anything else. I enjoy church service but anything outside of that to "connect" seems...draining? The way things are now I just feel like I don't have the energy or motivation for it. I'm also still healing from a past relationship that makes me not really want to be around people my age much. I know being around them more might help, but I just don't have the desire for it.

I do have friends that I hang out with occasionally, when time permits. But I don't have a "Home church" with a "group".

I think I'm just worn out mentally, emotionally, physically, even spiritually...a million things have happened over just the past couple of months, but sometimes I feel bad for not having a small group or whatever that I'm a part of. I guess as a Christian that grew up with a church family before, it feels almost wrong? But at the same time I currently don't know if I care? It's like I think deep down I want it, but time-wise and energy-wise I don't.

Now I'm just rambling. Hopefully some of that makes sense.

**** don' t wear yourself out---- be balanced with people ect.---- Commune with the Lord--- fellowship over the phone or text a Christian friend that will lift you up...

 

[Believer88]

Having a home church is a great thing! You should find one! Try it out and see if you like it.

 

[ChandlerFan]

I don't think there is anything wrong with where you are at right now.

You and I have been on similar journeys in the past 1-2 years I'm pretty sure, so a lot of what I'm going to say is assuming you went through similar things or can relate.
I think when you are going through a time of struggling with your faith and its place in your life in the aftermath of a breakup, it's a long process to get back to where you were at before. It's great that you're going to church and have stayed committed to that. I think as you continue to move towards a place where you are more serious about your faith and your relationship with God is starting to deepen and you are starting to desire more edification in your life that desire for community will grow. It's even okay to not be excited about being around lots of people your age. I think that will come too as you continue to heal, but don't feel like you have to force it. You have said you go to church and you have friends that you hang out with, so it's not like you're isolating, which is the thing I would be most worried about.
Don't hear me say that you are in a bad place, though. You just have to be honest with yourself and where you are at, keep seeking God and taking little steps toward Him, and your desire for more of those things will come. I will be praying for you too, and always feel free to shoot me a text or FB message if you ever want to chat about anything.