Journey to enter into rest
Poetic map Inspired from The dark night of the soul, by St John of the cross
1: On a dark night, kindled in love with yearnings, oh happy chance!
I went forth without being observed, My house being now at rest.
Entering into rest in God, our soul no longer experiences distress as in the valley of decision: where we are troubled with cares of this life and not one with God as we should. We forsake the fountain of living water, seeking in creature what is found in God; left to ourselves because we left our first Love, until we return. Think of the prodigal son, in depravity from seeking comfort in this world and coming to His senses to return to the Father as a servant of no reputation. The Father runs to the son, embraces him and gives him the best robe: a new identity by the Holy Spirit. The Father puts a ring on his finger: authority as son of God over all deceitful power of the enemy. The Father puts shoes on his feet: "He that says he lives in Him is to walk even as He walked." Rightly related to God, is not how you see yourself, it's how we see God and change in identity with Him. "How beautiful on the mountains are the feet of Him who brings good news, proclaiming peace, announcing news of renewal.” The Father prepares a feast, the son has come home: the Father does it all! Not about you and what you did, but who's you are and what He did to save us from ourselves.
"Come to Me, all you that labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you, and learn of Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy, and My burden is light." We don't have anything to prove with ministry of our own, "Then said they to him: What shall we do, that we might work the works of God? Jesus answered and said to them: This is the work of God: that you believe on Him whom He has sent." Believing is "Faith that works by Love," "Love does not insist on its own way." Otherwise thinking we arrived to a place of freedom, we encounter a deceitful enemy unwilling to give up control: desires of the flesh in pride of achievement to take things in our hands again: the fruit of the tree of knowledge of good and evil, the false self in the mind of the flesh. While I start working Jesus stops, "What is gain for me is lost for Christ."
"For all in the world living for pleasures of the flesh and pleasure of the eyes and pride in achievements and possessions, are not of the Father, but of the world."
Just as Saul desired to remain in charge when David is anointed king; the old man still desires control when we receive the Holy Spirit. Progress of inner life is a fight of faith, between the outward man in the mind of the flesh and the inner man in a journey to find the Holy Spirit as our help, to enter the mind of Christ. "The weapons of our warfare are not of our fleshly mind, but mighty through God to pull down strong holds; turning down imaginations and every proud thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to obedience of Christ."
"Prepare for war... Multitudes, multitudes in the valley of decision: for the day of the Lord, is near in the valley of decision."
The valley is a depression in the land with limited vision from disappointed expectations, where we stopped short on our journey: the little value we set on Him being what we received. "For where your treasure is there your heart will be." We can't we fight this battle on our own. "He that is not with me is against me; and he that gathers not with me scatters abroad. Wherefore I say to you, all manner of sin shall be forgiven unto men: but rejecting the Holy Ghost shall not be forgiven unto men."
If we do not walk in the light we have, we deceive ourselves and become dull of hearing, so that knowledge of God becomes something far away. In disorder of inner life spiritual reading does not bring relief; not having put away our divided spirit leaves room for the spirit of fear and offensive temper: repeating insanity of looking for fulfilment in deceitful desires of the flesh becomes addictive, driven by fear, to cling to a life for ourselves, "Lovers of pleasure more than Lovers of God."
"This kind does not come out but by prayer and fasting."
"God has not given us the spirit of fear, but of Love and power and a sound mind."
The fast that pleases the Lord, to put away our divided spirit is not about abstaining from food but to get past ourselves: moved by His compassion to share our bread with the hungry, to cease from controlling desires and from our own words (Isaiah 58)... Maturity is to stand alone with God, cough up to God where nothing else is real in sight of reality in God.
"Strive to enter in at the strait gate: for many, I say to you, will seek to enter in, and shall not be able." Fear of losing a life for ourselves keeps us controlled by desires. Just as the caterpillar dissolves for the butterfly to emerge; we lose the old life in unfulfilled desires of the flesh, “Where their worm dies not and the fire is not quenched," to mount up to God with wings as eagles, to have our thirst satisfied by His spirit. "In the last day of the feast, Jesus stood and cried saying: If any man thirst, let Him come to Me and drink. He that believes in Me, as the scriptures say, out of his belly shall flow rivers of living water. (He was refereeing to His Spirit given to everyone who would believe in him)."
You must value what you have, while we continue to drink from the fountain of living water we no longer thirst after the world. The refreshing of His Spirit satisfies us, not to take thing in our hands again "Perfect Love drives out all fear."
"If any of you wants to be my disciple, you must turn from your selfish ways, take up your cross daily and Follow me. If you seek your life, you will lose it, but if you lose your life for My sake you will save it." There is a cost to discipleship, "For which of you intending to build a tower, sits not down first and counts the cost he has to finish?" Not all believers are disciples, unless we forsake everyone and everything that would hold us back, including our own life, we don't have sufficient invested in God to gain interest and cannot be His disciple. “Many are called but few are chosen.” "Consider how you hear, for with the measure you receive and give, it will be measured to you when more is given." "If you continue in My word then are you My disciples, and you shall know the truth and the truth shall set you free."
Our destiny unfolds in a solitary journey of communion with God. As a babe nurtured with milk of its loving mother, the Grace of God carried us effortlessly; finding pleasure in spiritual things with faults unaware until taken from the breast and set down to learn to walk in the Spirit. "Whom shall God teach knowledge and whom shall He make to understand hearing? Those that are weaned from the milk and drawn from the breasts." When discontent to lose habits of a babe we strive for knowledge rather than 'humility. Such one-sided repentance of our will and pride of achievement does great harm, “Knowledge puffs up, but Love builds up.” Having not patience to wait on God to give more light and taking things in our hands again we offend: lecturing or reproving others to feel better about ourselves is contrary to meekness, as friends of God extend reconciliation rather than judgment. "God resists the proud, and gives grace to the humble." Jesus told religious leaders, "The publicans and sinners enter the kingdom of God before you." To seek His authority for advantage disqualifies us; until we see our desire for recognition keeps us from facing our emptiness in relationship with God.
"How shall we escape if we neglect so great salvation?"
"For many walk, of whom I have told you often, and now tell you even weeping, the enemies of the cross of Christ: whose end destruction, whose god their belly, who glory in their shame and mind earthly things."
Paul referred to opposition from worldly religious leaders controlled by desire (Acts 14:4), as having "fought with beasts who caused the multitude of the city to be divided." "I die daily. If after the manner of men I have fought with beasts at Ephesus, what advantaged it me, if the dead rise not?" "For we would not brethren, have you ignorant of our trouble which came to us in Asia, that we were pressed out of measure, above strength, so much that we despaired even of life; but we had the sentence of death in ourselves, that we should not trust in ourselves, but in God who raises the dead."
"I determined not to know anything among you, save Jesus Christ and Him Crucified."
To seek first the kingdom of God is the journey to enter His rest. "Then shall the kingdom of heaven be likened to ten virgins who took their lamps and went forth to meet the bridegroom, and five of them were wise, and five foolish. The foolish took their lamps, and took no oil with them; but the wise took oil in their vessels with their lamps. While the bridegroom tarried, they all slumbered and slept. At midnight there was a cry made: Behold the bridegroom comes, go out to meet Him. Then all those virgins arose and trimmed their lamps. The foolish said to the wise: Give us of your oil, for our lamps are gone out. But the wise answered saying: Not this way, there is not enough for us and you, but go rather to them that sell and buy for yourselves."
The foolish had light for a while but had not put away their divided spirit to be carried by the Holy Spirit. We can't get a patch of the Holy Spirit to mend our divided spirit, our heart would be thorn worse, in trying to mend and comfort our old life in depravity: our divided spirit is put away to receive the Holy Spirit who will not be divided. The wise entered in the will of God with their whole heart and could not share with those in fear of losing a life for themselves, "God will not share His glory with another." "Behold I come quickly and my reward is with Me, to give every man according as His work shall be," "If we suffer with Him, we shall rule with Him." We become one with Him in the fellowship of His sufferings, to grow up in His Love. "If any man's work shall be burned, he shall suffer loss: but he himself shall be saved; yet so as by fire." "The rest of the dead did not live again until the thousand years were finished."
"For this reason we both labor and suffer reproach, because we trust in the living God, who is the Savior of all men, especially of those that believe."
Learning of Him to enter His rest, we no longer reason concerning the things of the Spirit, but still suffer trials of fear of getting lost on the road and affections indulged cause emptiness. The more we seek support in affections and imagination of this life, the more we feel the lack; weary in quietness like an addict tempted to go back to habits abandoned, like one who left a city and desires to return. Affections remain in the spirit as desire to take things in our hands again, until “When I grew up, I put away childish things.” “We must through much trouble enter the kingdom of God." To enter His presence with thanksgiving and remain standing praying. If we knew to be quietly listening, present with Him and not troubled with controlling desires, we would experience inner refreshment in ease from care; so delicate is the refreshing of the Spirit that even desire to experience Him hinders. This beginning of contemplation is dark to senses, not knowing where to go with understanding and imagination, to trust He communicates our present reality. "Lean not on your own understanding but trust in the Lord."
"When I was a child, I spoke as a child; I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things."
He will give more light when we walk in the light we have: to enter in the relationship of Jesus in constant fellowship with the Father, praying in the influence of His Spirit where we have trouble. “In everything give thanks, pray without ceasing, rejoice ever more, for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you."
Seeing dimly God's perspective we no longer try to master His Word in our understanding and yield ourselves as members of His body. "We all with open face, beholding as in a glass the glory of our Lord, are changed into the same image from glory to glory, by the Spirit of the Lord." Like a vine pruned of excess branches; losing our old life in a wilderness where life doesn't make sense, to emerge as the choice branch remaining in fellowship with God; receiving abundance from the vine to produce more fruit. Detached from love of pleasure and gaining Love of neighbor, not judging as before we have peace and comfort in God.
"Let us not judge one another anymore, but judge this rather, that no-one cause a brother to stumble."
"For those who eat and drink without discerning the body of Christ eat and drink judgment on themselves. That is why many among you are weak and sick and a number of you have fallen asleep. But if we were discerning, we would not come under judgment. Nevertheless, when we are judged by the Lord, we are being disciplined so that we will not be condemned with the world."
The message of the cross is not to deny our self on our own strength, we could not: identified with the disciples of Christ in the communion of the last super, "All of you will abandon me this night," following to the garden of Gethsemane as His disciples, "Became heavy with sleep… This is the hour and power of darkness." Peter convinced to die with Him in battle, unable to identify with His suffering rejection by those desiring to be in charge, until empowered by His Spirit; like His disciples we would abandon Him and go back to our own lives. Good will is not enough, "I want to do what is right but I don’t, Instead I do what I hate... I have the will but not the power to do what is right." Deep down you don’t want to be healed. The Holy Spirit is given to us forever as our healing and Life from the dead, to enable us to Love as God Loves and forgive our enemies, that's why rejecting Him can't be forgiven. "For if you forgive not, neither will your Father in heaven forgive you." Few proceed further in identity with Christ: to get past, you have to surrender everything. Thankful for what we have in relationship with God is advancing into His rest: to dwell with Him as never absent. “Enter in at the strait gate, for wide is the gate and broad is the way, that leads to destruction and many there be which go in there: because strait is the gate, and narrow is the way, that leads to life, and few there be that find it.” Entering in the Father's House is about the will of God, in labor that is fruitful. “Jesus turned and saw them following and said to them: What do you seek? They said to Him: Master where do You live? He said to them: Come, and see. So they came and saw where He lived; and they stayed with Him that day, for it was about the tenth hour."
The night of the spirit could be years after the night of following Christ in our senses, but having experienced Him won’t be forgotten. Night comes and then dawn, having serenity and fellowship in community without hindrances as before, seeing dimly the reality of the kingdom of heaven within. "Where two or more are gathered in My name, there I Am in the midst of them." Now is the accepted time of renewal," "Ask and it shall be given, seek and you shall find, knock and it shall be opened."
To follow His Spirit as our guide to enter into Life, we enter as we learn to give and receive Love, not about changing others: the Spirit empowering us to change and Love others as they are, frees them to change. Brokenness between conscience and subconscious is healed as we admit our faults and become real in relationships. "Confess your faults one to another and pray one for another that you may be healed." Maturing Love is loving out of our need to become real, as opposed to needing to be loved. Honestly admitting and sharing our failure and praying for one another that we may be healed.
Poetic map Inspired from The dark night of the soul, by St John of the cross
1: On a dark night, kindled in love with yearnings, oh happy chance!
I went forth without being observed, My house being now at rest.
Entering into rest in God, our soul no longer experiences distress as in the valley of decision: where we are troubled with cares of this life and not one with God as we should. We forsake the fountain of living water, seeking in creature what is found in God; left to ourselves because we left our first Love, until we return. Think of the prodigal son, in depravity from seeking comfort in this world and coming to His senses to return to the Father as a servant of no reputation. The Father runs to the son, embraces him and gives him the best robe: a new identity by the Holy Spirit. The Father puts a ring on his finger: authority as son of God over all deceitful power of the enemy. The Father puts shoes on his feet: "He that says he lives in Him is to walk even as He walked." Rightly related to God, is not how you see yourself, it's how we see God and change in identity with Him. "How beautiful on the mountains are the feet of Him who brings good news, proclaiming peace, announcing news of renewal.” The Father prepares a feast, the son has come home: the Father does it all! Not about you and what you did, but who's you are and what He did to save us from ourselves.
"Come to Me, all you that labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take My yoke upon you, and learn of Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy, and My burden is light." We don't have anything to prove with ministry of our own, "Then said they to him: What shall we do, that we might work the works of God? Jesus answered and said to them: This is the work of God: that you believe on Him whom He has sent." Believing is "Faith that works by Love," "Love does not insist on its own way." Otherwise thinking we arrived to a place of freedom, we encounter a deceitful enemy unwilling to give up control: desires of the flesh in pride of achievement to take things in our hands again: the fruit of the tree of knowledge of good and evil, the false self in the mind of the flesh. While I start working Jesus stops, "What is gain for me is lost for Christ."
"For all in the world living for pleasures of the flesh and pleasure of the eyes and pride in achievements and possessions, are not of the Father, but of the world."
Just as Saul desired to remain in charge when David is anointed king; the old man still desires control when we receive the Holy Spirit. Progress of inner life is a fight of faith, between the outward man in the mind of the flesh and the inner man in a journey to find the Holy Spirit as our help, to enter the mind of Christ. "The weapons of our warfare are not of our fleshly mind, but mighty through God to pull down strong holds; turning down imaginations and every proud thing that exalts itself against the knowledge of God, and bringing into captivity every thought to obedience of Christ."
"Prepare for war... Multitudes, multitudes in the valley of decision: for the day of the Lord, is near in the valley of decision."
The valley is a depression in the land with limited vision from disappointed expectations, where we stopped short on our journey: the little value we set on Him being what we received. "For where your treasure is there your heart will be." We can't we fight this battle on our own. "He that is not with me is against me; and he that gathers not with me scatters abroad. Wherefore I say to you, all manner of sin shall be forgiven unto men: but rejecting the Holy Ghost shall not be forgiven unto men."
If we do not walk in the light we have, we deceive ourselves and become dull of hearing, so that knowledge of God becomes something far away. In disorder of inner life spiritual reading does not bring relief; not having put away our divided spirit leaves room for the spirit of fear and offensive temper: repeating insanity of looking for fulfilment in deceitful desires of the flesh becomes addictive, driven by fear, to cling to a life for ourselves, "Lovers of pleasure more than Lovers of God."
"This kind does not come out but by prayer and fasting."
"God has not given us the spirit of fear, but of Love and power and a sound mind."
The fast that pleases the Lord, to put away our divided spirit is not about abstaining from food but to get past ourselves: moved by His compassion to share our bread with the hungry, to cease from controlling desires and from our own words (Isaiah 58)... Maturity is to stand alone with God, cough up to God where nothing else is real in sight of reality in God.
"Strive to enter in at the strait gate: for many, I say to you, will seek to enter in, and shall not be able." Fear of losing a life for ourselves keeps us controlled by desires. Just as the caterpillar dissolves for the butterfly to emerge; we lose the old life in unfulfilled desires of the flesh, “Where their worm dies not and the fire is not quenched," to mount up to God with wings as eagles, to have our thirst satisfied by His spirit. "In the last day of the feast, Jesus stood and cried saying: If any man thirst, let Him come to Me and drink. He that believes in Me, as the scriptures say, out of his belly shall flow rivers of living water. (He was refereeing to His Spirit given to everyone who would believe in him)."
You must value what you have, while we continue to drink from the fountain of living water we no longer thirst after the world. The refreshing of His Spirit satisfies us, not to take thing in our hands again "Perfect Love drives out all fear."
"If any of you wants to be my disciple, you must turn from your selfish ways, take up your cross daily and Follow me. If you seek your life, you will lose it, but if you lose your life for My sake you will save it." There is a cost to discipleship, "For which of you intending to build a tower, sits not down first and counts the cost he has to finish?" Not all believers are disciples, unless we forsake everyone and everything that would hold us back, including our own life, we don't have sufficient invested in God to gain interest and cannot be His disciple. “Many are called but few are chosen.” "Consider how you hear, for with the measure you receive and give, it will be measured to you when more is given." "If you continue in My word then are you My disciples, and you shall know the truth and the truth shall set you free."
Our destiny unfolds in a solitary journey of communion with God. As a babe nurtured with milk of its loving mother, the Grace of God carried us effortlessly; finding pleasure in spiritual things with faults unaware until taken from the breast and set down to learn to walk in the Spirit. "Whom shall God teach knowledge and whom shall He make to understand hearing? Those that are weaned from the milk and drawn from the breasts." When discontent to lose habits of a babe we strive for knowledge rather than 'humility. Such one-sided repentance of our will and pride of achievement does great harm, “Knowledge puffs up, but Love builds up.” Having not patience to wait on God to give more light and taking things in our hands again we offend: lecturing or reproving others to feel better about ourselves is contrary to meekness, as friends of God extend reconciliation rather than judgment. "God resists the proud, and gives grace to the humble." Jesus told religious leaders, "The publicans and sinners enter the kingdom of God before you." To seek His authority for advantage disqualifies us; until we see our desire for recognition keeps us from facing our emptiness in relationship with God.
"How shall we escape if we neglect so great salvation?"
"For many walk, of whom I have told you often, and now tell you even weeping, the enemies of the cross of Christ: whose end destruction, whose god their belly, who glory in their shame and mind earthly things."
Paul referred to opposition from worldly religious leaders controlled by desire (Acts 14:4), as having "fought with beasts who caused the multitude of the city to be divided." "I die daily. If after the manner of men I have fought with beasts at Ephesus, what advantaged it me, if the dead rise not?" "For we would not brethren, have you ignorant of our trouble which came to us in Asia, that we were pressed out of measure, above strength, so much that we despaired even of life; but we had the sentence of death in ourselves, that we should not trust in ourselves, but in God who raises the dead."
"I determined not to know anything among you, save Jesus Christ and Him Crucified."
To seek first the kingdom of God is the journey to enter His rest. "Then shall the kingdom of heaven be likened to ten virgins who took their lamps and went forth to meet the bridegroom, and five of them were wise, and five foolish. The foolish took their lamps, and took no oil with them; but the wise took oil in their vessels with their lamps. While the bridegroom tarried, they all slumbered and slept. At midnight there was a cry made: Behold the bridegroom comes, go out to meet Him. Then all those virgins arose and trimmed their lamps. The foolish said to the wise: Give us of your oil, for our lamps are gone out. But the wise answered saying: Not this way, there is not enough for us and you, but go rather to them that sell and buy for yourselves."
The foolish had light for a while but had not put away their divided spirit to be carried by the Holy Spirit. We can't get a patch of the Holy Spirit to mend our divided spirit, our heart would be thorn worse, in trying to mend and comfort our old life in depravity: our divided spirit is put away to receive the Holy Spirit who will not be divided. The wise entered in the will of God with their whole heart and could not share with those in fear of losing a life for themselves, "God will not share His glory with another." "Behold I come quickly and my reward is with Me, to give every man according as His work shall be," "If we suffer with Him, we shall rule with Him." We become one with Him in the fellowship of His sufferings, to grow up in His Love. "If any man's work shall be burned, he shall suffer loss: but he himself shall be saved; yet so as by fire." "The rest of the dead did not live again until the thousand years were finished."
"For this reason we both labor and suffer reproach, because we trust in the living God, who is the Savior of all men, especially of those that believe."
Learning of Him to enter His rest, we no longer reason concerning the things of the Spirit, but still suffer trials of fear of getting lost on the road and affections indulged cause emptiness. The more we seek support in affections and imagination of this life, the more we feel the lack; weary in quietness like an addict tempted to go back to habits abandoned, like one who left a city and desires to return. Affections remain in the spirit as desire to take things in our hands again, until “When I grew up, I put away childish things.” “We must through much trouble enter the kingdom of God." To enter His presence with thanksgiving and remain standing praying. If we knew to be quietly listening, present with Him and not troubled with controlling desires, we would experience inner refreshment in ease from care; so delicate is the refreshing of the Spirit that even desire to experience Him hinders. This beginning of contemplation is dark to senses, not knowing where to go with understanding and imagination, to trust He communicates our present reality. "Lean not on your own understanding but trust in the Lord."
"When I was a child, I spoke as a child; I understood as a child, I thought as a child: but when I became a man, I put away childish things."
He will give more light when we walk in the light we have: to enter in the relationship of Jesus in constant fellowship with the Father, praying in the influence of His Spirit where we have trouble. “In everything give thanks, pray without ceasing, rejoice ever more, for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you."
Seeing dimly God's perspective we no longer try to master His Word in our understanding and yield ourselves as members of His body. "We all with open face, beholding as in a glass the glory of our Lord, are changed into the same image from glory to glory, by the Spirit of the Lord." Like a vine pruned of excess branches; losing our old life in a wilderness where life doesn't make sense, to emerge as the choice branch remaining in fellowship with God; receiving abundance from the vine to produce more fruit. Detached from love of pleasure and gaining Love of neighbor, not judging as before we have peace and comfort in God.
"Let us not judge one another anymore, but judge this rather, that no-one cause a brother to stumble."
"For those who eat and drink without discerning the body of Christ eat and drink judgment on themselves. That is why many among you are weak and sick and a number of you have fallen asleep. But if we were discerning, we would not come under judgment. Nevertheless, when we are judged by the Lord, we are being disciplined so that we will not be condemned with the world."
The message of the cross is not to deny our self on our own strength, we could not: identified with the disciples of Christ in the communion of the last super, "All of you will abandon me this night," following to the garden of Gethsemane as His disciples, "Became heavy with sleep… This is the hour and power of darkness." Peter convinced to die with Him in battle, unable to identify with His suffering rejection by those desiring to be in charge, until empowered by His Spirit; like His disciples we would abandon Him and go back to our own lives. Good will is not enough, "I want to do what is right but I don’t, Instead I do what I hate... I have the will but not the power to do what is right." Deep down you don’t want to be healed. The Holy Spirit is given to us forever as our healing and Life from the dead, to enable us to Love as God Loves and forgive our enemies, that's why rejecting Him can't be forgiven. "For if you forgive not, neither will your Father in heaven forgive you." Few proceed further in identity with Christ: to get past, you have to surrender everything. Thankful for what we have in relationship with God is advancing into His rest: to dwell with Him as never absent. “Enter in at the strait gate, for wide is the gate and broad is the way, that leads to destruction and many there be which go in there: because strait is the gate, and narrow is the way, that leads to life, and few there be that find it.” Entering in the Father's House is about the will of God, in labor that is fruitful. “Jesus turned and saw them following and said to them: What do you seek? They said to Him: Master where do You live? He said to them: Come, and see. So they came and saw where He lived; and they stayed with Him that day, for it was about the tenth hour."
The night of the spirit could be years after the night of following Christ in our senses, but having experienced Him won’t be forgotten. Night comes and then dawn, having serenity and fellowship in community without hindrances as before, seeing dimly the reality of the kingdom of heaven within. "Where two or more are gathered in My name, there I Am in the midst of them." Now is the accepted time of renewal," "Ask and it shall be given, seek and you shall find, knock and it shall be opened."
To follow His Spirit as our guide to enter into Life, we enter as we learn to give and receive Love, not about changing others: the Spirit empowering us to change and Love others as they are, frees them to change. Brokenness between conscience and subconscious is healed as we admit our faults and become real in relationships. "Confess your faults one to another and pray one for another that you may be healed." Maturing Love is loving out of our need to become real, as opposed to needing to be loved. Honestly admitting and sharing our failure and praying for one another that we may be healed.