My apology to CC

[cyphercat]

I deserve your hate.
I deluded myself into thinking I was doing something for Christ.
I lashed out at people who intended good for me.
I am in fear for my own life.
I have hurt my relationship with my daughter.
I said lies about God.
I hurt Christ.
I hurt the cause of Christ.
Please delete all of my threads, except for this one for a while so everyone knows that I have decided to seek counseling, or possibly check into a rehab facility.
You were all right.
I'm taking down my youtube videos. It's tainted with DXM.
I won't really be coming back here, even if you did forgive me.
I was ignorant of the pain I was causing.
I didn't know how my words were hurting all of you.
I deserve a backlash for even this thread.
I say it again, i was entirely ignorant of what I was really doing. My intent was always to help.
I thought I was serving Christ, and I was deluded and wrong.
I'm sorry.

 

[Ugly]

No clue whats going on, but they don't delete most posts/threads unless they are explicitly against the rules. So they aren't about to go hunt down and delete each of your posts, thereby confusing the flow of existing threads.

 

[secularhermit]

Go to the outreached, if you think you´s made wrong cypher.

you have NOT hurt the cause of Christ. Not even Satan, so ALL are learning here (and out there).

You are not an ignorant and deserve the same all WE deserve.

 

[Fenner]

I am pleading with you to have that girl stay with a responsible caring adult until you're well again. I am very worried for her. Please if she has good Grandparents, her Mother, Aunt, Uncle, please keep her safe. I am praying that you put her first.

 

[just_monicat]

cyphercat, i'm sorry if you feel anger from people. that's couldn't be further from my feelings. you must understand that it is very hard for people to watch someone on such a destructive path.

my heart has broken for you since i started reading your posts, and want nothing but healing and good things for you and your daughter. all of my words have been intended to help, whether to educate or encourage you to take any steps necessary for you heal. i have been praying for you, and i truly hope you seek and receive the help that you need.

 

[cyphercat]

I am pleading with you to have that girl stay with a responsible caring adult until you're well again. I am very worried for her. Please if she has good Grandparents, her Mother, Aunt, Uncle, please keep her safe. I am praying that you put her first.

I'm not being sarcastic when I say this.
I know you're expending real worry about my daughter, and will continue to until your notion of how the situation should be handled is satisfied.
I live with her grandparents (my parents).
They've never let her come to harm, they won't while I recover.
This entire incident has made me a bit wounded and tender.
I won't be back for a long while.
Starting now.

 

[wwjd_kilden]

Praying you will get everything back on track, and hoping you will return to us to share the testimony.

- God bless you and keep you

 

[jimmydiggs]

I don't understand. What happened?

 

[38miles]

Discernment. One night I clicked on a video of his. It was confronting and I was both sad and scared for this person. I prayed for him and then sent a PM… It is impossible to know what is truth when there are so many veils of deception. Yes we should give the benefit of the doubt, but…well the thread where he went all Jim Morrison. I only post these private things because I believe this guy was scamming something from the start. Hence the "getting raped in prison" which actually made me think he had some type of delay. Which is obscene considering he has mastery of rhetoric.

Hey man -- just wanted to tell you that I watched your Vlog the other day and I was really moved brother and felt led to pray for you with a fair amount of fervor. If there is anything specific that I can pray for you about, please know that I will gladly and truthfully lift you, your dreams, and any struggles up to the Lord.

I am thankful for you on CC.

Peace in Jesus....

Michael

Reply

Your care is heartwarming.
Everything is well in my life, the Lord has taken care of about everything.
But there are a couple of things.
First, sometimes i shoot my mouth off, and I'm afraid that when I witness to people I'm going to say something that might get me killed or arrested. That would take me away from my daughter for a long time and I might get raped in prison. So if you remember me in prayer, remember that, that God would either intervene and keep this from happening, or that he would help me guard my tongue.
Second, and this is a minor request, that the Lord would help me exercise more, eat right, and lose some weight.
If you thought my vlogs were a blessing, you might keep watching them. I intend to make one everyday.
Thanks!
And if you have a special request I will add it to my prayer list which I pray over daily.

And then...

Hey -- I'm still praying for you. I'll be honest, you seem all jacked up. But I am too.

I saw a post before about hell, but it blinded my eyes.

I'm honest, I listen, and i pray.

Hit me up if you're In ineed?

Jesus ----------------------

I want God to make me not care about falling in love any more.

And my last...

You need to talk or message man i'm usaually around, this stuff you're facing is hard, but don't drug numb the pain.

let me know.

Father, reveal to this man the areas within him that younwant him towork on, such as exercise, eating habits, skating, Father give him peace in knowing that you will work on the inward parts that only You can.

And that was that…he never responded and went on a tear on all the boards

 

[Fenner]

I remember him having a prayer request about going to preach the gospel and essentially what he told you.

When someone isn't sober they don't think straight. Depending on how long he's been drinking this cough syrup and maybe other drugs, he might have some brain damage.

I pray he gets help, sticks with a program and remains sober. Maybe he'll come back here with a testimony someday and that would be good.

 

[ww_21]

I have no idea what you're experiencing but sounds to me as if you're in pain. If you ever need someone to talk to I'm around.

 

[cyphercat]

Update:
I have a church right down the road I can start going to. I have people there I can be accountable to. They are trustworthy and will check up on me.
My daughter is fine. like I've said, I live with my parents. No harm will ever come to my daughter at my hands. I want to be offended that everyone is fearful for her, because I know how tender and delicate I am with her, and how I treat her, and I can be a bit prideful about how much I love my daughter. But I understand that you are my brothers and sisters in Christ, and you have to consider that you only know so much about me and have to assume the worst at times.

But thank you all for reaching out to me.

The first few days have been painful. I have been doubling over in pain at times, but I am getting through it.
I don't have to be angry at people.
I don't have to vent here on CC anymore.

I am thankful that Christ forgave me for blaspheming and for trying to preach the truth under the influence of drugs.
I am glad that people here love me and want the best for me.
I am glad people are praying for my daughter.

I hope that I get things straightened out. Then maybe I'll meet that girl that I keep daydreaming about. You know. She's like that person that we all daydream about, "the one". Or at least a type of "the one". I don't believe in "the one". But I believe that a girl can bring you happiness that will fulfill everything you ever hoped to receive by finding "the one". I don't care how physically unattractive I am, or how revolting it is to girls to think that I might be attracted to them, I'm going to keep trying to find a girl that I can bring the same happiness to that I hope to receive from her. Christ has made it happen with other people, he can make it happen with me.

 

[Toska]

You are obviously having a very hard time in your life right now. If you need a friend, I am here and willing to listen. I am praying for you, cyphercat. God Bless.