Need a woman's view

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
N

Nor86

Guest
#1
#1
My husband and I have been together for almost 10 years, we have 2 children and have divorced and now are trying to work it out again. I struggle at times with feeling like the children and I are not a priority and at time like we get in the way of his life. When he takes time and dedicated it to us he is amazing. We both work a lot and he usually only has one day off. At times after work he hangs out with the guys ( fishing, gym, bating cages, bar). I don't mind once in a while but it seems like almost everyday this week. I am in the military so my work schedule isn't much better but when I get of work I stress about getting the kids on Time, homework, dinner, baths, etc... It would be nice to feel like I had help with these duties when he is here its hard to talk to him because he is always on his phone ( games) I don't know if I am being too needy and I try to be as patient as I can, but I feel very lonely and unimportant. I don't nag at him about it but I notice that to keep from going off on him I avoid talking to him completely, which I know isn't the right answer either. He doesn't see anything wrong with what he's doing and our lack of communication leaves me struggling to make important decisions alone ( reenlistment in the military, possible military schools to attend, what duty station we may go to, etc). I ask for his advice and he says do what's best babe but then when I tell him I made a decision he says its dumb. I go to sleep every night after praying with hope and in the morning I wake up stressed because almost every night I dream about our family and he's always irritable in my dreams. I feel at times like I am walking on eggshells with him, because I don't know how to approach the conversation without him getting mad. I don't know what to do.
 
M

MissCris

Guest
#2
#2
I know it's not pleasant, but sometimes you just have to make your husband mad. You have to deal with it, not take it so personally, and say what you need to say to him. If you don't try, he'll never know you're feeling like this, the non-communication will continue, and eventually things will just explode.

Also, if he's getting angry at you for voicing your feelings/concerns, if you're doing it in a respectful way, then HE has some issues to work out for himself.

If you're both so busy, he does need to be putting in more time to help you.
 
H

hattiebod

Guest
#3
#3
When you decided to try again....what did you both decide to do differently to make it work? It takes 2 to make a relationship work and it needs to have good communication. Loving the Lord and wanting to have Him in charge of the home, is a given? Set asside some time alone, once the children are in bed, make an appointment! :) and then talk it all through. I hope that you will be able to work it out. tell him how you feel but be prepared to accept some criticism too and to remain calm. Maybe he feels he is not needed to make decisions regarding his family and maybe he is not, you are very capable but thats not the point...you need to be a team and make such choices and decisions together. God Bless you and your family . <><
 
You must log in or register to reply here.