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I apologize if this post runs a little long, but I am in need of some advice from a non-biased point of view.
I have found myself in the situation of being in love with one of my best friends. This all started about two years ago when we first started hanging out as just friends. About a year ago we decided to try and see if we could be more. When we decided this he was out of town and wouldn’t be home for about five weeks. So while I anxiously waited for him to come home we talked over the phone, texted morning to night etc. There was one small catch. Yes, were best friends, but in our group of four we were also both best friends with a couple. So the four of us had our own little odd family dynamic going. So we decided to keep things between me and him to not cause any tension within our group. So everything I was feeling I couldn’t express quite yet to by best gal pal who was like my sister.
Once he got back, things had changed somehow, I was still 100% wanting to keep building a relationship. But he on the other hand, was pulling away. We went out a few times and seems to be working out as being a couple. Then one day he told me he needed to work on himself and become closer to God before he decides to settle down with anyone. Being a woman strong in my faith and him being a man strong in his faith, I completely supported and understood that. It broke my heart but at the same time I had so much respect for him in being honest with me.
Until two weeks later….
We were at an event with all of our family and friends. When he walks up with a new women. Now I am not one to judge, but I had heard of her to be not that great of an influence on men and rarely faithful. So aside from having my heart ripped out of my chest to the point I actually had to get up and leave as gracefully as I could. I was worried for him. Genuinely worried. Needless to say I told my gal pal everything that night as I was curled up crying on her couch.
About eight months have gone by now. I had actively tried to move on by getting to know someone new. But I still have not been able to shake this genuine love I have for him. I have never felt this way before. This complete, all in, forgiving of all love that makes it hard to breathe if I think back about it.
We’ve made it back to the point now where things aren’t awkward like they were, we are now god parents to a wonderful little girl whose parents are part of the group we call family. But things seem to be growing again between us.
Now after all that here is my question: Through all of this I have felt like God has been there telling me to not give up on him. I’ve always felt him calm any anger I had towards him and kept telling me not to cut him out of my life. Am I crazy? Could this just be me in denial? Could I be making excuses for not moving on? After this long I just need help. I am truly torn and to get my hopes up for any future progress we may have or to cut those specific emotional ties. Any advice is greatly appreciated!
I have found myself in the situation of being in love with one of my best friends. This all started about two years ago when we first started hanging out as just friends. About a year ago we decided to try and see if we could be more. When we decided this he was out of town and wouldn’t be home for about five weeks. So while I anxiously waited for him to come home we talked over the phone, texted morning to night etc. There was one small catch. Yes, were best friends, but in our group of four we were also both best friends with a couple. So the four of us had our own little odd family dynamic going. So we decided to keep things between me and him to not cause any tension within our group. So everything I was feeling I couldn’t express quite yet to by best gal pal who was like my sister.
Once he got back, things had changed somehow, I was still 100% wanting to keep building a relationship. But he on the other hand, was pulling away. We went out a few times and seems to be working out as being a couple. Then one day he told me he needed to work on himself and become closer to God before he decides to settle down with anyone. Being a woman strong in my faith and him being a man strong in his faith, I completely supported and understood that. It broke my heart but at the same time I had so much respect for him in being honest with me.
Until two weeks later….
We were at an event with all of our family and friends. When he walks up with a new women. Now I am not one to judge, but I had heard of her to be not that great of an influence on men and rarely faithful. So aside from having my heart ripped out of my chest to the point I actually had to get up and leave as gracefully as I could. I was worried for him. Genuinely worried. Needless to say I told my gal pal everything that night as I was curled up crying on her couch.
About eight months have gone by now. I had actively tried to move on by getting to know someone new. But I still have not been able to shake this genuine love I have for him. I have never felt this way before. This complete, all in, forgiving of all love that makes it hard to breathe if I think back about it.
We’ve made it back to the point now where things aren’t awkward like they were, we are now god parents to a wonderful little girl whose parents are part of the group we call family. But things seem to be growing again between us.
Now after all that here is my question: Through all of this I have felt like God has been there telling me to not give up on him. I’ve always felt him calm any anger I had towards him and kept telling me not to cut him out of my life. Am I crazy? Could this just be me in denial? Could I be making excuses for not moving on? After this long I just need help. I am truly torn and to get my hopes up for any future progress we may have or to cut those specific emotional ties. Any advice is greatly appreciated!