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Okay, I've read over this thread a few times, and I think it's time I gave my two cents worth.
I see a lot of negativity and guilt being portrayed in the responses given here, and I find it somewhat amusing that the people who are giving the strongest opinions and claiming they know all the answers are those who aren't even married!
That being said, I'd like to present an opinion from he perspective of not only a Moderator here, but a woman of God and also a WIFE!!!
I agree with the earlier statement made by Silverwind 'What a man and his WIFE do behind closed doors is their own business'.
The thing we gotta remember is ANY kind of sexual activity outside of marriage is wrong! Whether it's oral, anal, intercourse, touching.. whatever.. if you're not married, keep your hands OFF and your clothes ON!
I think the problem is the way we all view sex in todays society, sure the world has this twisted, perverted view of sex, but why are we, as Christians getting it wrong too?
The bible is very clear on sex and the way in which God intended for it to be used. It is not taboo, or sinful. God designed sex, He wants us to enjoy it, BUT ONLY within the realms of marriage. What is right, or enjoyable for one couple may not be for another. There isn't anywhere in the bible that specfies God only wants us to have sex for the purpose of procreation. He never said, you must only be intimate to bear forth children, you must not use any form of protection, you must never engage in oral sex...do you see that anywhere in the bible? NO!!!
He wants to make sure we get it right, by not having sex before we're married, but once we're married He wants us to enjoy it for all it's worth. For some people that will mean an entirely different thing than for others, and you know what? That's okay!!
If I can be really candid and honest here, you gotta spice it up a little. The key to having great sex is to discover what your spouse REALLY LIKES! God doesn't want us to have boring/ restrictive intimate lives. Sex is an essential part of a healthy marriage, you gotta get it right! I'm not saying it's THE most important thing, but it's definitely important. It shouldn't be considered a 'side issue'. Trust me, if you can get that part of your marriage right, and learn to place value in the importance of sex in the relationship, you're gonna avoid a LOT of common mistakes people make. You can save yourself from frustration!
Guys and girls are wired differently, now IN GENERAL (and I say that because I acknowledge it's not ALWAYS the case) guys are usually more interested in sex than girls. Girls need to understand WHY guys are like that, and learn what to do to make it work. Sometimes that will mean trying new things, or exploring different ideas. Let's be honest, sex is GREAT, if you get it right. I'm not ashamed to say that, I love my husband, and I love sex. I have had this conversation with numerous people, and everyone's opinions vary slightly on what is/isn't considered acceptable. I just think you gotta do whatever works for you as a couple.
There are some great books/DVDs/ resources available on these very topics written by Christians from Christian perspectives. I highly recommend these!
I've kinda gone off topic here, but I guess the main point is, it's OKAY to enjoy sex if you're married (we were designed that way- God gave us our sex drives), it's okay if you like oral sex, it's okay if you don't. But let's try not to put words into God's mouth, or impose our opinion on others. There is nowhere in the bible that considers 'oral sex' as immorality, and I don't think it's healthy to portray this as being so!
I hope that helps!
I see a lot of negativity and guilt being portrayed in the responses given here, and I find it somewhat amusing that the people who are giving the strongest opinions and claiming they know all the answers are those who aren't even married!
That being said, I'd like to present an opinion from he perspective of not only a Moderator here, but a woman of God and also a WIFE!!!
I agree with the earlier statement made by Silverwind 'What a man and his WIFE do behind closed doors is their own business'.
The thing we gotta remember is ANY kind of sexual activity outside of marriage is wrong! Whether it's oral, anal, intercourse, touching.. whatever.. if you're not married, keep your hands OFF and your clothes ON!
I think the problem is the way we all view sex in todays society, sure the world has this twisted, perverted view of sex, but why are we, as Christians getting it wrong too?
The bible is very clear on sex and the way in which God intended for it to be used. It is not taboo, or sinful. God designed sex, He wants us to enjoy it, BUT ONLY within the realms of marriage. What is right, or enjoyable for one couple may not be for another. There isn't anywhere in the bible that specfies God only wants us to have sex for the purpose of procreation. He never said, you must only be intimate to bear forth children, you must not use any form of protection, you must never engage in oral sex...do you see that anywhere in the bible? NO!!!
He wants to make sure we get it right, by not having sex before we're married, but once we're married He wants us to enjoy it for all it's worth. For some people that will mean an entirely different thing than for others, and you know what? That's okay!!
If I can be really candid and honest here, you gotta spice it up a little. The key to having great sex is to discover what your spouse REALLY LIKES! God doesn't want us to have boring/ restrictive intimate lives. Sex is an essential part of a healthy marriage, you gotta get it right! I'm not saying it's THE most important thing, but it's definitely important. It shouldn't be considered a 'side issue'. Trust me, if you can get that part of your marriage right, and learn to place value in the importance of sex in the relationship, you're gonna avoid a LOT of common mistakes people make. You can save yourself from frustration!
Guys and girls are wired differently, now IN GENERAL (and I say that because I acknowledge it's not ALWAYS the case) guys are usually more interested in sex than girls. Girls need to understand WHY guys are like that, and learn what to do to make it work. Sometimes that will mean trying new things, or exploring different ideas. Let's be honest, sex is GREAT, if you get it right. I'm not ashamed to say that, I love my husband, and I love sex. I have had this conversation with numerous people, and everyone's opinions vary slightly on what is/isn't considered acceptable. I just think you gotta do whatever works for you as a couple.
There are some great books/DVDs/ resources available on these very topics written by Christians from Christian perspectives. I highly recommend these!
I've kinda gone off topic here, but I guess the main point is, it's OKAY to enjoy sex if you're married (we were designed that way- God gave us our sex drives), it's okay if you like oral sex, it's okay if you don't. But let's try not to put words into God's mouth, or impose our opinion on others. There is nowhere in the bible that considers 'oral sex' as immorality, and I don't think it's healthy to portray this as being so!
I hope that helps!
