N
Alright, this is the first time that I've ever tried to seek advice on this matter, even though it's been happening for quite some time. I'm 21 and I still live with my parents. I love and respect them greatly, however my mother has an extreme anxiety disorder. Here's an example: I work at a cafe, which is obviously a pretty safe job, aside from the occasional knife cut while making a sandwich, and sometimes I get kept at work for a few minutes. I always call my mom when I'm leaving work, because I know that she likes to know when I'm on my way home so that she can know when I get home safe. (It's like her mind makes up crazy, grizzly scenarios when I don't text her. Like me, dead on the side of the road somewhere). So, as I said, sometimes I get off a little bit late. If I don't notify her and let her know, she will call me. Over and over and over, until I answer. It's nonstop. I understand why she worries, I really get it. But sometimes I can't answer, and if I tell her that, or even let out that I'm a bit frustrated, it's like I'm in the wrong. I can't even tell her that her worrying so much is overbearing. She sometimes leaves for a weekend to babysit my nephew, and she will call me at 5 a.m. every morning to make sure I didn't die in my sleep, and to make sure that the doors are locked, we live in a very safe area, mind you. I don't know what to do anymore, and I don't want to fight with her, so I just give in and enable this behavior, but I know that it can't happen for forever. I'm not even allowed to be out late with friends because she can't sleep when I'm not home. Like I said, I'm 21. Honestly I just know that I need this to change. I'm afraid that the only way to change it will be to have some huge blow out between us. I don't want our relationship to change, though. I need help. Are there any parents who've gone through the same thing, or any adults who have had to deal with this?