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The man I called husband beat me and shot one of our family dogs. We had a beautiful home in the foothills and were very happy together for a time.
As a very small child he was raped by a member of his church. His father, the pastor, didn't believe him when he turned to him for help. When he became an adult he married and his wife cheated on him and got pregnant. He divorced her and had been divorced for 5 years when I met him. I knew he had trust issues, but I had no idea he would ever hurt me or kill an innocent creature.
I am out of the situation, but am very very sad and lonely. I miss my husband and the happy times we had together. I miss our life on the sunny hill. Surrounded by beautiful trees, fishing and laughing, listening to music and loving eachother.
How can one person make you experience the most joy you've ever shared with another human being and the worst pain and hurt too? I don't understand that. I know what happened was not my fault. I know he loves me and is sorry for what he did, but I can't go back. He won't get help for the rage that is in his heart. I'm afraid for his soul. His beautiful soul that I love so much!
I miss my husband. I am having a hard time. Starting my life over at 31 is rough and makes you feel like such a failure. I am ashamed that this happened to me. I feel like he took my joy away. I am not the person I was before. I am scared, anxious and depressed.
There have been 7 marriages in my church since this happened to me. Young, beautiful, joyful lives that are just starting out together. This weekend my close family member will be getting married also. I am in the wedding and am hoping I can hold it together through that. Seeing all these young couples makes my struggle harder. Why was my love bond not good enough or strong enough to save?
Please pray that God carries me through this. It's one of those things, you think, "that will never happen to me." I am still in shock at times. I can't sleep.
As a very small child he was raped by a member of his church. His father, the pastor, didn't believe him when he turned to him for help. When he became an adult he married and his wife cheated on him and got pregnant. He divorced her and had been divorced for 5 years when I met him. I knew he had trust issues, but I had no idea he would ever hurt me or kill an innocent creature.
I am out of the situation, but am very very sad and lonely. I miss my husband and the happy times we had together. I miss our life on the sunny hill. Surrounded by beautiful trees, fishing and laughing, listening to music and loving eachother.
How can one person make you experience the most joy you've ever shared with another human being and the worst pain and hurt too? I don't understand that. I know what happened was not my fault. I know he loves me and is sorry for what he did, but I can't go back. He won't get help for the rage that is in his heart. I'm afraid for his soul. His beautiful soul that I love so much!
I miss my husband. I am having a hard time. Starting my life over at 31 is rough and makes you feel like such a failure. I am ashamed that this happened to me. I feel like he took my joy away. I am not the person I was before. I am scared, anxious and depressed.
There have been 7 marriages in my church since this happened to me. Young, beautiful, joyful lives that are just starting out together. This weekend my close family member will be getting married also. I am in the wedding and am hoping I can hold it together through that. Seeing all these young couples makes my struggle harder. Why was my love bond not good enough or strong enough to save?
Please pray that God carries me through this. It's one of those things, you think, "that will never happen to me." I am still in shock at times. I can't sleep.