jesusefreak, I am obviously not a teen so if my post is intrusive, please accept my apologies in advance. I wanted to share with you that I too, think about suicide almost daily. Maybe it is a brain chemistry thing, maybe it is learned behavior I cannot say but it really IS "normal" for me. I do understand that these are merely thoughts (take every thought captive in obedience toJesus Christ) and most likley, these thoughts come from some unyielded, unhealed place withiin me and DO NOT represent the true me, if that makes sense. Since they are just thoughts, I am not obligated to really act on them.
Some will tell you that every thought we have come either from God or Satan. I am not so sure. I have heard a lot of talk about "stanic attacks." I am not syaing satan isnt a liar or that he cannot impose his lies on us all I AM sayng is that I am learning (when these thoughts come) to DISMISS them because they do not represent who I am in Christ.
In other words, I am not actively suicidal per se, but yes, the thoughts are there. I pray that God allows me to come to a new awareness of who I am in Christ, my incorrect view of myself will be healed.
I pray that for you as well.
Feelings aren't facts- they are just emotional repsonses to a situation; I dont have to act on them. I am now OK with talking about suicidal thoughts (in fact I find it lessens their power) and you have my total respect for opening this thread. By the way I've been in therapy a lot befofre, but I have found that NOTHING replaces going on my knees before a mericful God and submitting the the fact that He knows me better than I know myself. I am not suggesting or condemning therapy; merely relating my own experience.
I pray that God heal all the buried parts of me that I cannot access and I yield them to his power. Know that you are truly loved, just as you are,
and Jesus thinks you are to die for.