what do you think would help keenan? I was in a similar boat and had to work through many painful memories but I am sure that with the power of the holy spirit and the grace of our Lord we can work something out and hope for the better.
Keep this in your mind and let it sink in to the soul: John 14:27
My peace I give unto you, not as the world gives it,
understanding your body and praying for bodily wisdom helps ALOT in my personal experience, anyways brother if I can offer any advice it would to try and set your heart on Jesus and on his love and his kindness, take care.