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C
I mean, I want to be best friends with whoever I end up marrying....so it would kind of suck if being best friends with a guy isn't probable. lol However, that's not what I'm looking for right now. I have quite a few guy friends. I usually get along with guys better than girls....but a good portion of them have, at one time or another, expressed feelings for me, so it's made our friendship a little awkward. Especially when I have to VERY GENTLY say, "not in a million years" because they don't love God.
It's just a sad situation to turn someone down and then have it kinda wreck your friendship, ya know?
It's just a sad situation to turn someone down and then have it kinda wreck your friendship, ya know?
D
Yes its possible. Anything is possible as AgeofKnowledge said.
My childhood friend and I have been bestfriends since our diaper days (being that our moms are best friends too)
We've never ever thought of being more than platonic mainly because its like gross for both of us (as were as close as brothers and sisters)
We dont see each other as often as we want to nowadays since Ive moved to another country, but still keep in touch through skype
My childhood friend and I have been bestfriends since our diaper days (being that our moms are best friends too)
We've never ever thought of being more than platonic mainly because its like gross for both of us (as were as close as brothers and sisters)
We dont see each other as often as we want to nowadays since Ive moved to another country, but still keep in touch through skype
U
Yes, it's possible. Though certain things can make it more difficult. One of which is if neither of you are dating anyone else, and he is looking for a spouse. The other difficulty you're going to face is that from a physical standpoint you're very pretty. And, while i don't know you much, the bit i've seen of you you also seem to be a nice friendly person. So for a guy to get to know a pretty girl thats also nice .. its like hitting the jackpot so to speak haha. So while it is totally possible, just know for you it will be harder to do than for some others.
Gr, I've never really stated my opinion on this before and the words just aren't coming out right. I guess I'll apologize in advance for making this so psychological, but I don't know how else to convey my thoughts on it...
Abraham Maslow published a widely accepted "hierarchy of needs". His concept is that there is a progression of needs that must be met by each person in order to grow psychologically. After securing physical needs and safety needs, comes a need for friendship intimacy and family. Until this need has been met by both people involved in the friendship, it is impossible for a normal person to be in a friendship like you desire. In the span of a friendship, this need can be met and then deprived. Specifically applying this, if you were to find a guy that was in an intimate relationship(marriage), or possibly was meeting this need via a partial-family, you could probably avoid the awkwardness. If not, I think you would need to fight through the awkwardness if you truly desired the person as a friend. With no guarantee that they will ever truly meet their need, getting past it can be a longgggg process.
Abraham Maslow published a widely accepted "hierarchy of needs". His concept is that there is a progression of needs that must be met by each person in order to grow psychologically. After securing physical needs and safety needs, comes a need for friendship intimacy and family. Until this need has been met by both people involved in the friendship, it is impossible for a normal person to be in a friendship like you desire. In the span of a friendship, this need can be met and then deprived. Specifically applying this, if you were to find a guy that was in an intimate relationship(marriage), or possibly was meeting this need via a partial-family, you could probably avoid the awkwardness. If not, I think you would need to fight through the awkwardness if you truly desired the person as a friend. With no guarantee that they will ever truly meet their need, getting past it can be a longgggg process.
C
Well, that sucks. lol But thanks so much! You're too sweet. This is pretty much the main reason for wanting to be friends with someone before dating. haha Gotta watch out for the creepers.
However, this question really wasn't for the dating aspect....it's really for the friendship factor. I don't have many friends right now and two of my closest friends are about to move out of state. It's hard to be friends with a single parent, I understand this. Big reason why I came on here was to make some friends. Fellowship with fellow believers is SO important. I felt selfish at first for feeling the need for friends but...I think that's the way God designs some of us. ^_^
Anyway, thank you all for your comments. I guess any friendships I have will just have to be lifted up to the Lord in prayer.
M
This is the thing that makes it seem impossible, it's easy to think that because it becomes akward the only solution is to end the friendship or allow it to just fade away.
It's fair to say that many of these relationships that develop while both people are adults will at some point experience sexual attraction, mutual or not, but it's no different than any other type of relationship problem, like if a marriage suffers a lack of sexual initmacy it isn't a reason to get divorced, it's seriosuly tough to get back to a good place, but people who make the effort do seem to make it back.
Having a close platonic friendship with a man/woman is doable, but like any serious relationship the people involved need to be aware at the start of likely problems they'll face and be prepared to rise to the challenge when it comes, not just pursue a friendhhip with their fingers crossed that their feelings won't evolve somewhere down the line.
After all it is a bit naive to think that if you like a person enough to want them in your life everyday that at some point it won't stray into romance, it can be dealt with, but only if both people truly value the friendship.
It's fair to say that many of these relationships that develop while both people are adults will at some point experience sexual attraction, mutual or not, but it's no different than any other type of relationship problem, like if a marriage suffers a lack of sexual initmacy it isn't a reason to get divorced, it's seriosuly tough to get back to a good place, but people who make the effort do seem to make it back.
Having a close platonic friendship with a man/woman is doable, but like any serious relationship the people involved need to be aware at the start of likely problems they'll face and be prepared to rise to the challenge when it comes, not just pursue a friendhhip with their fingers crossed that their feelings won't evolve somewhere down the line.
After all it is a bit naive to think that if you like a person enough to want them in your life everyday that at some point it won't stray into romance, it can be dealt with, but only if both people truly value the friendship.
C
That's something that I hadn't fully thought about, actually. I mean, I know that any close relationship takes work....I just didn't think too much about that aspect of it. And I'm not saying that I would never want a friendship to progress to the next level....I'm just saying I'd want it to be mutual and I'd want it to be further on in the friendship. I dunno...see, this is why I needed some opinions. lol