Why should the guy ASK the girl out, and, not the other way around, ever ?

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
G

GreenNnice

Guest
#1
#1
Are there many good reasons that a guy should be the ONLY one who asks a girl out on a date?

Now, I know, artyiste did a thread similar but he was asking a similar question, not the same question, and, he said himself that he wanted his specific question answered. So............ :)

This is my specific question above. :)

By the way, I believe, in getting to know someone as friends, developing a friendship and that is the reason to even be seeking marriage, you are telling the Lord that you think that you are ready for THAT kind of a best friend, a partner, whom you can have and hold for the rest of your Earthly life, in serving Him, in glorifying Him, in helping each other to grow closer to Christ in your lives because that should be the #1 thing, in so many ways of doing things for YOU, who are "one flesh" once married. :)

Please, keep the thread with couth and decency and keep the ladies happy, rather , filled with joy, for why you say what you say, guys :)


I will give the biggest reason I can think of. The guy who gets asked out can get into a mentality of this girl is so into him that she asked him out and, therefore, he will be more physical in the relationship, at least, because she asked him out, there is MUCH for temptation and thoughts swimming through the guys' mind because she asked him out.


Again, as I said in artyiste thread, it is vague in what just is 'making the first move,' or, to 'initiate' or, move the relationship to a going-out stage.


And, when I say the word 'ever,' as in the title, there are ALWAYS exceptions to the rule, the Lord leads. I don't have all the answers for God's call on people's lives, but, in most cases, the guy for MANY reasons, should ASK the girl out :)

So, let's hop to it, what are the MANY reasons ?
 
JesusChica1991

JesusChica1991

Banned
#2
May 9, 2012
1,514
25
0
#2
I tend to be the pursuer in relationships. Most guys I am interested in are EXTREMELY shy. Come on...men can appreciate being pursued. Some guys even find it more attractive. I can say I was the pursuer in most of my relationships.
 
Liamson

Liamson

Senior Member
#3
Feb 3, 2010
3,078
69
48
#3
Is this like the 5th thread with the same theme? (at least the 5th this year)
 
secularhermit

secularhermit

Banned
#5
May 3, 2013
8,719
75
0
#5
[h=2]Why should the guy ASK the girl out, and, not the other way around, ever ?[/h]
Perhaps it is cheaper, for her, to be sure he always pays...

Ha! Ha!
 
secularhermit

secularhermit

Banned
#6
May 3, 2013
8,719
75
0
#6
JesusChica1991 said:
I tend to be the pursuer in relationships. Most guys I am interested in are EXTREMELY shy. Come on...men can appreciate being pursued. Some guys even find it more attractive. I can say I was the pursuer in most of my relationships.
Click to expand...
There a Disney´s movie I like: "UP".

I have loved the character of that girl impersonated, as I have seen it in very few people. Now I know you said you are like that.

I wish you the best!
 
C

colalella2891

Guest
#7
#7
JesusChica1991 said:
I tend to be the pursuer in relationships. Most guys I am interested in are EXTREMELY shy. Come on...men can appreciate being pursued. Some guys even find it more attractive. I can say I was the pursuer in most of my relationships.
Click to expand...
Agreed. I don't think it matters who pursues.
 
Lyd

Lyd

Member
#8
Dec 10, 2013
36
3
8
#8
The man is to be the head of the family, and the leader of the home.

When I was a kid (10yrs old) I used to say "If a man doesn't have the balls to ask me out, then he wont be man enough to lead the family."
 
A

Art05

Guest
#9
#9
JesusChica1991 said:
I tend to be the pursuer in relationships. Most guys I am interested in are EXTREMELY shy. Come on...men can appreciate being pursued. Some guys even find it more attractive. I can say I was the pursuer in most of my relationships.
Click to expand...
Yep yep yep. It's very attractive. Ladies, pursue!
 
A

Art05

Guest
#10
#10
artyiste ?


:confused:What on earth? :p
 
Lyd

Lyd

Member
#11
Dec 10, 2013
36
3
8
#11
(I wanted to edit the other message but i took too long and it wouldn't let me edit it, so here's me clarifying myself)

The man is to be the head of the family, and the leader of the home.

When I was a kid (10yrs old) I used to say "If a man doesn't have the balls to ask me into a relationship, then he wont be man enough to lead the family."

Needless to say not just any guy would be daring enough to ask me into a relationship because they knew I wanted the long haul. I didn't believe in dating for the sake of dating, nor just being in a relationship for the sake of being in a relationship. Marriage is to be a reflection of Christ's love to the church. Its sacred, its not all rules and regulations but we are to keep ourselves pure and holy, we are supposed to guard our hearts (proverbs 4) Marriage is only "beautiful" when it is the way God intended it to be...when it is a true reflection of love and intimacy, just as our relationship with God is supposed to be.
 
JesusChica1991

JesusChica1991

Banned
#12
May 9, 2012
1,514
25
0
#12
Lyd said:
The man is to be the head of the family, and the leader of the home.

When I was a kid (10yrs old) I used to say "If a man doesn't have the balls to ask me out, then he wont be man enough to lead the family."
Click to expand...
As a kid, that's cute; but in reality, that's not always the case. My dad is as shy as all get out and he makes a great leader of the household; however, he did pursue my mother. I don't mind being pursued either because personally, it doesn't matter who pursues who.
 
secularhermit

secularhermit

Banned
#13
May 3, 2013
8,719
75
0
#13
Lyd said:
The man is to be the head of the family, and the leader of the home.

When I was a kid (10yrs old) I used to say "If a man doesn't have the balls to ask me out, then he wont be man enough to lead the family."
Click to expand...
I don´t know it as true. By 1993 I met TEAM EXPANSION. Within them, there were two missioneries and Donna told me she was the one who wanted to draw his attention. She tied and tried, so David saw her, the way they finally got married. Otherwise, David was so concerned on the seminary, his work for Jesus, that would have missed a very nice person to be hooked for decades.

I have seen how that "leadership" sometimes, is led the otherway around: CONSENSUS is the leading motive and doing what is best, walk together with GOD´s tips. (AMOS 3:3 may serve to balance both sides and wishes)
 
S

ServantStrike

Guest
#14
#14
JesusChica1991 said:
As a kid, that's cute; but in reality, that's not always the case. My dad is as shy as all get out and he makes a great leader of the household; however, he did pursue my mother. I don't mind being pursued either because personally, it doesn't matter who pursues who.
Click to expand...
Clearly you've never seen The Running Man...
 
D

DragonSlayer

Guest
#16
#16
When I see the Scriptures, all I see is men taking the first step, not to " date ", but to marry !
Men are the natural leaders of their houses,
and they are supposed to behave as Christ did with His Church.
Now the same question could be asked as : " Did Jesus choose His disciples first,
or was it the disciples who chose Jesus first ?
It was Jesus who chose His disciples first,
it was Him making the first step to choose His Church, His beloved Bride !

Men should do the same as Christ towards their potential wife, their potential beloved bride !

Also, beating around the bush, " dating ", that's the worst !
And that utterly disgusting, confusing, vague, and heartbreaking " friend zone " !
Beating around the bush, " dating ", is not for me.

Don't have time and tears to waste ! :(

Courting is the 'straight to the point' way to go ! :)
 
Last edited by a moderator:
M

MissCris

Guest
#17
#17
Neither party should be pursuing the other, that just leads to lustful sinning...er...sinful lusting. Only the parents or family should be setting people up. Arranged marriages for the WIN!!!

*runs full-speed out of thread, laughing like a maniac*

Don't let me eat cookies before dinner anymore. Pleeeease.
 
C

colalella2891

Guest
#18
#18
Lyd said:
(I wanted to edit the other message but i took too long and it wouldn't let me edit it, so here's me clarifying myself)

The man is to be the head of the family, and the leader of the home.

When I was a kid (10yrs old) I used to say "If a man doesn't have the balls to ask me into a relationship, then he wont be man enough to lead the family."
Click to expand...
That's not always the case though. My dad pursued my mom first, and eventually she became the leader of the household. She got so fed up with doing everything that now they're divorced. My mom said at times it felt like she was the only adult in the house.

Just because a man pursues doesn't necessarily mean he'll be a good leader of the household.
 
secularhermit

secularhermit

Banned
#19
May 3, 2013
8,719
75
0
#19
colalella2891 said:
(...) My dad pursued my mom first, and eventually she became the leader of the household. She got so fed up with doing everything that now they're divorced. My mom said at times it felt like she was the only adult in the house.

Just because a man pursues doesn't necessarily mean he'll be a good leader of the household.
Click to expand...
Here we see a "rule" broken... something like that happened to us: My mother worked and my father spent the money with other women. (a sad thing too)
 
U

Ugly

Guest
#20
#20
Lyd said:
The man is to be the head of the family, and the leader of the home.

When I was a kid (10yrs old) I used to say "If a man doesn't have the balls to ask me out, then he wont be man enough to lead the family."
Click to expand...
Which is a pure load of crap. What the two things have to do with one another i've yet to figure out. What a mans level of shyness has to do with their ability to make decisions and run his family is a connection i can't make.

And seriously, how many times can the same people talk on this same topic? Some people think it doesn't matter, some do. Ok. There. Done. Can't we think of anything else to discuss?
 
You must log in or register to reply here.