an experiential crisis <-- so that might explain "feeling fake" or "inner reluctance"
the audacity to let the Lord Jesus Christ <-- the audacity, that word can be potentially helpful, ... let the lord Jesus, that can also feel "crucifying, and we are scared of being crucified"
likeness of Himself <-- so this is the part that never fails
slave, for every message you make, I can see that you are naturally good at making quality thread in cc.com
To become one with Jesus Christ, a person must be willing not only to give up sin, but also to surrender his whole way of looking at things. Being born again by the Spirit of God means that we must first be willing to let go before we can grasp something else. The first thing we must surrender is all of our pretense or deceit. What our Lord wants us to present to Him is not our goodness, honesty, or our efforts to do better, but real solid sin. Actually, that is all He can take from us. And what He gives us in exchange for our sin is real solid righteousness. But we must surrender all pretense that we are anything, and give up all our claims of even being worthy of God’s consideration.
Once we have done that, the Spirit of God will show us what we need to surrender next. Along each step of this process, we will have to give up our claims to our rights to ourselves. Are we willing to surrender our grasp on all that we possess, our desires, and everything else in our lives? Are we ready to be identified with the death of Jesus Christ?
We will suffer a sharp painful disillusionment before we fully surrender; hence, the experiential crisis at first. When people really see themselves as the Lord sees them, it is not the terribly offensive sins of the flesh that shock them, but the awful nature of the
pride of their own hearts opposing Jesus Christ. When they see themselves in the light of the Lord, the shame, horror, and desperate conviction hit home for them.
If you are faced with the question of whether or not to surrender, make a determination to go on through the crisis, surrendering
all that you have and all that you are to Him. And God will then
equip you to do all that He requires of you. This is having the audacity to allow the Lord be indeed your Sovereign Lord and Master.