The go-between

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Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
8,146
2,967
113
#1
Spill
Have you ever...done any of the following ....succesfully matchmaked a couple
set up a blind date for someone else
brokered a marriage
written and spell checked someone else's love letter * @seoulsearch *
officiated at a wedding
been a bridesmaid or best man

or...
have you consoled someones divorce/breakup
been a witness/on the jury
been a 'beard' for someone
told someone else that someone else 'liked' them (or didnt like them)
been the messenger/hitman/person who gave someone else the pink slip

if you have, would you happily do these things or is it just you get roped into doing them??? Is it fun being 'the third wheel'?
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
16,226
3,690
113
#2
Matchmakers are busybodies with too much free time on their hands. They need a real hobby, one that doesn't mess up other people's lives.

As for breaking up, people should have the guts to do it themselves. If somebody ever asked me to tell his girlfriend he was leaving her, I'd tell him to be a man and tell her himself.

That's my grumpy old man perspective. Other people have other opinions on the subjects.
 

laughingheart

Senior Member
Sep 21, 2016
1,662
1,576
113
#3
Somebody cover Lynx's eyes and scroll away from this post on his behalf. One of the fellows in our college and career was a frequent dater but couldn't find "the one". He was a great guy but looking for the wrong type of woman. (I'd known him a number of years and heard enough stories to make that determination.) I have an amazing friend from university who had the values and character that would be a good match for my friend. She was grounded in her faith and humility. She was also beautiful but as she was a couple of inches taller I didn't think they would have necessarily considered each other. I asked her to meet me at our church Christmas concert. I told him to go, he knew who she was, and take my place. I did phone her before, make my apologies and asked her to sit with my friend. Twenty weeks later they were married. They have since had four children, adore each other and it has been 25 + years.
 

Lynx

Folksy yet erudite
Aug 13, 2014
16,226
3,690
113
#4
*Lynx gets out the flamethrower.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
8,146
2,967
113
#5
Somebody cover Lynx's eyes and scroll away from this post on his behalf. One of the fellows in our college and career was a frequent dater but couldn't find "the one". He was a great guy but looking for the wrong type of woman. (I'd known him a number of years and heard enough stories to make that determination.) I have an amazing friend from university who had the values and character that would be a good match for my friend. She was grounded in her faith and humility. She was also beautiful but as she was a couple of inches taller I didn't think they would have necessarily considered each other. I asked her to meet me at our church Christmas concert. I told him to go, he knew who she was, and take my place. I did phone her before, make my apologies and asked her to sit with my friend. Twenty weeks later they were married. They have since had four children, adore each other and it has been 25 + years.
wow secret squirrel. Did they know you were behind all this...? or you didnt tell them/let on.
The fun of being Santa...
 

tourist

Senior Member
Mar 13, 2014
32,520
10,487
113
65
Florida
#7
Somebody cover Lynx's eyes and scroll away from this post on his behalf. One of the fellows in our college and career was a frequent dater but couldn't find "the one". He was a great guy but looking for the wrong type of woman. (I'd known him a number of years and heard enough stories to make that determination.) I have an amazing friend from university who had the values and character that would be a good match for my friend. She was grounded in her faith and humility. She was also beautiful but as she was a couple of inches taller I didn't think they would have necessarily considered each other. I asked her to meet me at our church Christmas concert. I told him to go, he knew who she was, and take my place. I did phone her before, make my apologies and asked her to sit with my friend. Twenty weeks later they were married. They have since had four children, adore each other and it has been 25 + years.
That is a storybook ending for sure. Getting married 20 weeks later is an interesting aspect to your story. It tells me that they both knew what they wanted, and having found it, acted on it swiftly. No need to waste precious years trying to get to know each other and then have a long engagement.
 

Encouragement

Well-known member
Aug 25, 2020
448
412
63
#8
Somebody cover Lynx's eyes and scroll away from this post on his behalf. One of the fellows in our college and career was a frequent dater but couldn't find "the one". He was a great guy but looking for the wrong type of woman. (I'd known him a number of years and heard enough stories to make that determination.) I have an amazing friend from university who had the values and character that would be a good match for my friend. She was grounded in her faith and humility. She was also beautiful but as she was a couple of inches taller I didn't think they would have necessarily considered each other. I asked her to meet me at our church Christmas concert. I told him to go, he knew who she was, and take my place. I did phone her before, make my apologies and asked her to sit with my friend. Twenty weeks later they were married. They have since had four children, adore each other and it has been 25 + years.
Beautiful..💕
 

Encouragement

Well-known member
Aug 25, 2020
448
412
63
#9
That is a storybook ending for sure. Getting married 20 weeks later is an interesting aspect to your story. It tells me that they both knew what they wanted, and having found it, acted on it swiftly. No need to waste precious years trying to get to know each other and then have a long engagement.
True
 

Krumbeard

Well-known member
Apr 15, 2019
569
483
63
#10
Spill
Have you ever...done any of the following ....succesfully matchmaked a couple
set up a blind date for someone else
brokered a marriage
written and spell checked someone else's love letter * @seoulsearch *
officiated at a wedding
been a bridesmaid or best man

or...
have you consoled someones divorce/breakup
been a witness/on the jury
been a 'beard' for someone
told someone else that someone else 'liked' them (or didnt like them)
been the messenger/hitman/person who gave someone else the pink slip

if you have, would you happily do these things or is it just you get roped into doing them??? Is it fun being 'the third wheel'?
I've never tampered with someone else's love life that I can remember...but that ain't sayin much.

However, I have been a groomsman in 8 weddings a best man in 1 and a groom in another.

Of all those marriages only one ended in divorce and one from death.

I did enjoy being in those weddings. It was fun. I was not "roped" into them. It was a privilege and an honor to be in them and more than that that they wanted me in them.

I've never been a "beard" for someone but I've had a beard.😁
 

Dino246

Senior Member
Jun 30, 2015
14,995
8,083
113
#11
While I wouldn't say it was "matchmaking", I did introduce two friends who later got married.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
8,146
2,967
113
#12
I've never tampered with someone else's love life that I can remember...but that ain't sayin much.

However, I have been a groomsman in 8 weddings a best man in 1 and a groom in another.

Of all those marriages only one ended in divorce and one from death.

I did enjoy being in those weddings. It was fun. I was not "roped" into them. It was a privilege and an honor to be in them and more than that that they wanted me in them.

I've never been a "beard" for someone but I've had a beard.😁
what do you have to do to be a groomsman?
I've never been a bridesmaid, but I have been a flowergirl, twice. I just had to hold the flowers.
I always wondered why it was called the 'groom' and how come the bride never had a best woman or BFF but a bridesmaid.
I dont know what 'same sex' couples do either, do they have opposite sex ones? You gotta wonder these days. Well, not really..

I've never matchmaked someone else. The only time I thought of doing it was when someone much older liked me and I tried to get him interested in my OLDER sister. he wasnt interested and my sister didnt know. I have younger brothers and never really thought that any of my friends would be interested in them since they were older. Not that they ever asked either.

I remember a well meaning but busybodyish ladies in church going do you want us to set you up with xxx in church but I'm like no. I think if they had done it without letting on it would have been better. But nobody ever sits next to me in church I like my space. Only widows.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
8,146
2,967
113
#13
if opposite sex single ppl sit next to each other in church, does everyone assume they are a couple. Just wondering.
 

Krumbeard

Well-known member
Apr 15, 2019
569
483
63
#14
what do you have to do to be a groomsman?
I've never been a bridesmaid, but I have been a flowergirl, twice. I just had to hold the flowers.
I always wondered why it was called the 'groom' and how come the bride never had a best woman or BFF but a bridesmaid.
I dont know what 'same sex' couples do either, do they have opposite sex ones? You gotta wonder these days. Well, not really..

I've never matchmaked someone else. The only time I thought of doing it was when someone much older liked me and I tried to get him interested in my OLDER sister. he wasnt interested and my sister didnt know. I have younger brothers and never really thought that any of my friends would be interested in them since they were older. Not that they ever asked either.

I remember a well meaning but busybodyish ladies in church going do you want us to set you up with xxx in church but I'm like no. I think if they had done it without letting on it would have been better. But nobody ever sits next to me in church I like my space. Only widows.
To be a groomsman you need to be asked. Then in all the weddings I've been in I had to wear a tux. We would usually tease the groom just before the wedding started...as good friends do. We also would pray for him and the marriage taking place.

And generally here in the states, the bride does have a maid of honor.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
8,146
2,967
113
#15
To be a groomsman you need to be asked. Then in all the weddings I've been in I had to wear a tux. We would usually tease the groom just before the wedding started...as good friends do. We also would pray for him and the marriage taking place.

And generally here in the states, the bride does have a maid of honor.
oh yes forgot that, I think probably cos the weddings I had gone to only had one bridesmaid not dozens.
The best man has to make a speech right?
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
8,146
2,967
113
#16
have been invited to a wedding and dont even know the groom, and also another friend is getting married to her fiance of 13 years.

I have had absolutely nothing to do with these matches...just invited as a guest. Both couples seem to be throwing their own as their parents are either dead, or in another country.

was talking to my boss and he said he was married once and wouldnt do it again (the wedding) as its just so expensive. Its very stressful I think to have a wedding, not sure if its MORE stressful having to organise it yourself or let your family organise it for you.
 
Mar 22, 2013
4,566
73
48
Indiana
#17
Spill

have you consoled someones divorce/breakup
been a witness/on the jury
been a 'beard' for someone
told someone else that someone else 'liked' them (or didnt like them)
been the messenger/hitman/person who gave someone else the pink slip

if you have, would you happily do these things or is it just you get roped into doing them??? Is it fun being 'the third wheel'?
Well I have been paid to spy on people, when you are good at something never do it for free.