Still accepted?

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
A

angie89

Guest
#1
#1
Does God still listen to me and love me when I have not legally marries my spouse? We've been together for 6 years and have a 3 year old son. We've wanted a decent wedding and have postponed it. I've been engaged for four years now.
We both work and I am a full time nursing student so times are hard.
Has God turned away?
Please I need honesty
 
N

Nicee

Guest
#2
#2
There is nothing u can do to make God love u less. Ask King David, Jona, Peter, Paul, Mose, Rahabb, and Satan. I will go on but u got my point.
 
A

angie89

Guest
#3
#3
Well I have been told by many that I will be denied Heaven because I am not legally married.
 
N

Nicee

Guest
#4
#4
angie89 said:
Well I have been told by many that I will be denied Heaven because I am not legally married.
Click to expand...
Denied Heaven? mmmmmm. By the time u go there u will already be marry..have grand kids..
lived a happy life etc. God can not deny people Heaven. We deny ourself God and Heaven because we think in order to gain God's favor we have to do a set of things.
 
E

Exoaria

Guest
#5
#5
I don't know the answer to this question. If what you're doing is not sin then there is a point where two people coming together is no longer fornication outside of marriage, otherwise it is always sin even if two people are together for 40 years, in love with each other and God and faithful to each other.

Those are the two possibilities.

I know that when I was living with my partner outside of marriage, I was coming from a place of impatience. I was trying to fill a void using her, and not using God to fill that place. I ended up being quite harsh with her and not spending time with her, just demanding and telling her to get out of my hair, and she took off to live with some guy she met on the internet.

I was heartbroken, and she ended up worse. I "loved her" for what I could get out of her. Not from a place of giving myself to her and treating her with the dignity that God values her at. I still pray for her, and feel a weight of responsibility for where she is now. That's just a testimony of my experience with living someone before marriage.

I wouldn't say that God is ever distant. I believe that Jesus has forever abolished the separation between man and God and the ability our sins have to keep Him from loving us. It's just that coming from a place of it being about you, and satisfying yourself, is detrimental.

Yes, you're still accepted.
I don't know if it's sin, most Christians would say it is.
 
G

Gandalf

Guest
#6
#6
angie89 said:
Does God still listen to me and love me when I have not legally marries my spouse? We've been together for 6 years and have a 3 year old son. We've wanted a decent wedding and have postponed it. I've been engaged for four years now.
We both work and I am a full time nursing student so times are hard.
Has God turned away?
Please I need honesty
Click to expand...
Unless one of you had a sexual relationship with another partner you are already married. The Bible also teach us to keep the laws of the country we live in so you have to get “legally married” as per the constitution of the country you life in. In the Bible the consummation of the marriage was when the bride and groom had sex. The Bible also describe this act as the one making us echad (one) with our partner. If you and your partner are Christians you would want to obey God’s word so get married and have a ceremony when you have saved enough money.

God will always love you but he expect us to follow his will and to listen to Him because that is real love and Godley fear of our Creator. Pray for God's guidance and assistance in this matter.
 
E

Exoaria

Guest
#7
#7
Gandalf said:
Unless one of you had a sexual relationship with another partner you are already married. The Bible also teach us to keep the laws of the country we live in so you have to get “legally married” as per the constitution of the country you life in. In the Bible the consummation of the marriage was when the bride and groom had sex.
Click to expand...
I always thought this was the case, well, I kind of thought it was the case.
Previously, I've had more sexual partners than I'm proud of. I don't mean to make this about me but can you share your basis of that first statement? I take it you'd be referring to the words of Christ... oh boy, I sure hope I'm not forever spiritually tied to that mistake I made when I was fourteen... that'd be a mess. Hah. Praise God that my eyes have been opened anyway.
 
G

Gandalf

Guest
#8
#8
Exoaria said:
I always thought this was the case, well, I kind of thought it was the case.
Previously, I've had more sexual partners than I'm proud of. I don't mean to make this about me but can you share your basis of that first statement? I take it you'd be referring to the words of Christ... oh boy, I sure hope I'm not forever spiritually tied to that mistake I made when I was fourteen... that'd be a mess. Hah. Praise God that my eyes have been opened anyway.
Click to expand...
My wife believes that you can break a soul tie but I have never found it in the Bible. Our pastor always warns us to be careful of ungodly soul ties.
 
E

Exoaria

Guest
#9
#9
Gandalf said:
My wife believes that you can break a soul tie but I have never found it in the Bible. Our pastor always warns us to be careful of ungodly soul ties.
Click to expand...
Well I haven't spoken to her or these people in years and very seldom think of them so I suppose the relevance is little. No condemnation, time to keep walking.
 
G

Gandalf

Guest
#10
#10
Exoaria said:
Well I haven't spoken to her or these people in years and very seldom think of them so I suppose the relevance is little. No condemnation, time to keep walking.
Click to expand...
You are right. No matter what we do now we can’t change the past… but definitely the future :) good to see your positive outlook on this!
 
S

sumasa

Guest
#11
#11
There is no problem if you were not christian before living with your man, because God forgives and forgets the sinful past... but, since I supose now you are a christian, you are living in sin. One person can't serve 2 lords, as the Bible sais.
Beeing a christian and fornicating is like a serial killer who thinks himself to be a christian. Our acts must prove our faith. Jesus said that.
..and yes, fornication is same as killing or telling a lie, because God said "he who is guilty of one sin is guilty of them all"
 
Last edited by a moderator:
F

faithisthyvictory

Guest
#12
#12
angie89 said:
Does God still listen to me and love me when I have not legally marries my spouse? We've been together for 6 years and have a 3 year old son. We've wanted a decent wedding and have postponed it. I've been engaged for four years now.
We both work and I am a full time nursing student so times are hard.
Has God turned away?
Please I need honesty
Click to expand...

God is so gracious even we have committed the most vicious crime. Take the example of king david, he committed adultery with bathsheba, murdered uriah. But God didn't stop from loving him. He's even known to be the man after God's own heart. And God has promised us in 1 John 1:9 that if we confess our sins He is faithful and just to forgive us. The important thing you should do like what king david did is to inquire to God, admit you committed a sin and be willing to do what is right. Its a normal thing that you feel like God has turned away from you because of the sin you have committed, everyone can feel that because the Holy Spirit is convicting us everytime we sinned. It only means that you are a child of God because He's convicting you. Remember, God loveth whom He chastiseth. God only hate sin but not the sinner. GBU
 
A

angie89

Guest
#13
#13
Thank you to everyone who has responded. I've been reading each message and taking it all in. It is sad that I thought God turned from me because many of my old Christian friends turned away from me.
 
M

MisterHarmony

Senior Member
#14
Jan 31, 2014
129
2
0
#14
You may consider having your wedding soon to fulfill all righteousness before God.
We have to assess fairly. That first idea is best choice overall, I think.
Your current situation doesn't strike me as super unreasonable though simply for the fact that you and your spouse-to-be are devoted to one another. It is like you already started the family life and you are holding on to the idea of a really nice wedding. I can't say it is wrong to want a nice wedding. Maybe there is a compromise in there somewhere though, because any action you take to marry sooner could be viewed as an offering to the Lord.
 
M

MisterHarmony

Senior Member
#15
Jan 31, 2014
129
2
0
#15
I am also sorry for the Christians making it difficult for you to come closer to the Lord. You can decide who you believe is a true follower by the amount of love they show you.
I think this is why Jesus says 'you are truly my disciples if you love one another'. Sometimes a Christian can get caught up in "rules" and mistakingly start to condemn acts of mercy and compassion.
 
M

MisterHarmony

Senior Member
#16
Jan 31, 2014
129
2
0
#16
Working full time with a child seems like a pretty full plate to me. Don't listen to the ones judging you. Anyone adding more burden or self judgment is not displaying wisdom from above. They are bitter like the devil.
The ones showing you kindness are the ones with the capacity to love more. Listen to those voices is my best advice.
 
M

MadParrotWoman

Guest
#17
#17
angie89 said:
Does God still listen to me and love me when I have not legally marries my spouse? We've been together for 6 years and have a 3 year old son. We've wanted a decent wedding and have postponed it. I've been engaged for four years now.
We both work and I am a full time nursing student so times are hard.
Has God turned away?
Please I need honesty
Click to expand...
God would not turn you away for not being married and your salvation was sealed when you gave your life to Christ. Your son and your partner as well as yourself are important to God, he loves you and that is why He would prefer you to be married. God would look at your lifestyle as sin - but that sin is no worse than all the other sins ALL Christians commit - whether or not they admit to them. Like I said though, it isn't a salvation issue.

It's not about how big and expensive your wedding is, it's about making a commitment to each other at minimum cost. I have found that the biggest, most celebrated weddings are usually the ones that don't last very long because all the emphasis is put on the one day. Really it's not about a single day but the rest of your lives together. God bless your family.
 
M

MadParrotWoman

Guest
#18
#18
angie89 said:
Thank you to everyone who has responded. I've been reading each message and taking it all in. It is sad that I thought God turned from me because many of my old Christian friends turned away from me.
Click to expand...
They weren't Christians...or friends.
 
A

angie89

Guest
#19
#19
I am a believer but my spouse is not.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.