Thread Titles You Will Never See In The Singles Forum

[arwen83]

I have laughed at so many of these posts! Good job! This is gonna be one fun thread

 

[lil_christian]

"Can you feel the Hate (or Hatred?) tonight? Top 5 ways to get the opposite gender to hate you"

 

[lil_christian]

(Now look...we're gonna see multiple forums with these titles as thread titles. And we're all gonna be proven wrong. XD Uh-oh, be prepared. Satan is about to take residence in someone's microwave!!)

 

[Fenner]

Is bringing my own gluten free wafers to communion a sin?

 

[lil_christian]

Is bringing my own gluten free wafers to communion a sin?

Yes, that's why my sis and I are going straight to the place down south that's VEEERRRYYYY hot. haha (for those who don't know, my sis and I are gluten-free/dairy-free)

 

[maxwel]

Gender reassignment surgery: should I tell my girlfriend now, or just surprise her Sunday at church?

 

[T_Laurich]

I believe God was talking about marijuana, when the bible says to stone people... Pass the joint MAN.

 

[Fenner]

I'm dating a Cyclops, is that a sin?

Max your avatar made me think of that.

 

[lil_christian]

How to swing a cat

I thought that said "How to Sew a Cat"

Then again, we probably won't be seeing THAT one in the forums, either.

(btw...aren't you guys getting tired of me since I've been posting so much? lol)

 

[maxwel]

I'm dating a Cyclops, is that a sin?

Max your avatar made me think of that.

It isn't a sin, but it will make all your cyclops-less friends extremely covetous.

 

[Galatians2-20]

"You mean I really have to stop sinning?!?"

Oh wait...

 

[T_Laurich]

I thought that said "How to Sew a Cat"

Then again, we probably won't be seeing THAT one in the forums, either.

(btw...aren't you guys getting tired of me since I've been posting so much? lol)

.........................

 

[arwen83]

I'm perfect. Help!

 

[lil_christian]

View attachment 46817 .........................

hey! Hey! That's not fair! Ya big meanie!

Next thread will never see (inspired by our friend, T_Laurich)

"Bullying is the greatest thing known to man"

 

[Jullianna]

This might be hard considering I've seen some pretty ridiculous thread titles. lol but here it goes............

"Trolling hard for a christian woman who is just as desperate"
"The Jesus in me used to love you,but you posted something I didn't agree with,so you can stick it!"
"Does God approve of strippers for Jesus?"
"Water into whine - why haven't you hooked me up with another single Lord?"
"WWJDFAKB - what would Jesus do for a klondike bar?"
"Did Jesus really mean that we should love one another or was he just joking?"
"The what I had for breakfast lunch and dinner thread,now with animated gifs"
"Satan lives in my microwave...Please pray for me!"
"Is it wrong to sleep with my husbands best friend even if he says it will bring him closer to God?"
"Help! - Reading the bible is like eating too much turkey. It makes me sleepy. 101 ways to stay awake during Numbers 13:1-16"

I've seen some threads over the years that have come kinda close to some of these

 

[iTOREtheSKY]

"How do I explain to my pastor that my outburst of Tourette's during service isn't the gift of Prophecy?"
"Why won't God bless me with more money so I can keep going to the casino weekly?"
"How do I get God to go against his word? AKA: clever ways to trick the Almighty in 10 easy steps"
"Does God hear my prayers better if I close my eyes really really super tight?"
"Can God love people who aren't white?"
"Why are poor people so darn needy?"
"10 ways to break it to your spouse that you hate the way they say "Father God" as a filler when they pray because they have nothing else to say!"
"Brussels Sprouts & 6 other vegetables:Signs of the coming Apocalypse?"
"Please pray for my Wife's,Aunt's,Nephew's parakeet Mr. Clemens who's going in for surgery next Tuesday"

 

[T_Laurich]

Is it in the Bible that I can't marry a dolphin? NEED HELP FAST WE ARE ENGAGED!

Shuts up and waits for Itore's next post

 

[lil_christian]

Is it in the Bible that I can't marry a dolphin? NEED HELP FAST WE ARE ENGAGED!

lol this made me laugh out loud too XD

 

[arwen83]

"How do I explain to my pastor that my outburst of Tourette's during service isn't the gift of Prophecy?"
"Why won't God bless me with more money so I can keep going to the casino weekly?"
"How do I get God to go against his word? AKA: clever ways to trick the Almighty in 10 easy steps"
"Does God hear my prayers better if I close my eyes really really super tight?"
"Can God love people who aren't white?"
"Why are poor people so darn needy?"
"10 ways to break it to your spouse that you hate the way they say "Father God" as a filler when they pray because they have nothing else to say!"
"Brussels Sprouts & 6 other vegetables:Signs of the coming Apocalypse?"
"Please pray for my Wife's,Aunt's,Nephew's parakeet Mr. Clemens who's going in for surgery next Tuesday"

These are TOOOOOOO FUNNY!! I love the one about the veggies lol

 

[NukePooch]

"I am Brad Pitt's body double,and when I'm not on the International Space Station, I dabble in priceless art collecting and writing my novels, and I just sold 250,000 shares of Apple stock to buy a new private jet so that I can make it to my Hawaiian resorts an hour quicker during weekends that I'm not caring for abused puppies or playing guitar on stage with my band in front of 10,000 soldiers stationed overseas. I just don't understand why women won't go out with me....does anyone have any advice?"