Why are so many women attracted to jerks?

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Ariel82 said:
sometimes girls need to recognize that the guy is a jerk to appreciate one who is NOT.

Most girls I know would look to date someone who resembles JESUS, not jerks

but there are some couples I've seen who are just using each other to get what they want: money, jewelry, sex, housing, etc. more of a business arrangement then a godly marriage/relationship. eventually one of them leaves when someone "better" comes along.
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This should have been the first comment... Watching men trying to figure out stuff makes you giggle??? is that why you held out this knowledge for so long????:p
 
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FireWire said:
So that's why women have never been interested in me.

Oh well I'm over it.
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Doubtful.

Sometimes "nice" guys aren't really nice. they just bottle up their emotions and come off as Fake.

Other times "nice" guys go into a meeting with the idea that either THEY or the WOMAN aren't good enough to have an enduring relationship. Causing them to fail before even the first date.

Sometimes people don't pick up the signs that the other person is interested.

Other times the guy is so self concious and insecure that its a warning sign that says "major emotional baggage and unforgiveness, date at your own risk"
 
Ariel82 said:
not all women. some women don't care. but probably all the ones you would want to date. don't know why guys would be bitter over it.
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I wish that was true but I have seen women who were smart, attractive and nice fall for guys who were jerks. I used to have a best friend who was an amateur bodybuilder and so many smart, attractive, nice women would just be crazy for him. I mean they could just blush from being around him and I know he was dating more than one of them at the same time. I wasn't a christian back then so I really didn't care what he did. The women he was with seemed happy so that didn't bother me either.

Me on the other hand, I couldn't get a date to save my life.
 
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T_Laurich said:
This should have been the first comment... Watching men trying to figure out stuff makes you giggle??? is that why you held out this knowledge for so long????:p
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lol no but that made me giggle :)

I don't stalk the singles forum (being married).

I just saw this one and happen to like Zero so read his thread. lol :)

I do talk to my friends in real life about it when the topic comes up (that's how we determined such pearls of wisdom and how to avoid jerks and not be B***)

. it doesn't come up too often nowadays because most of my friends are married too now. :)
 
zeroturbulence said:
I wish that was true but I have seen women who were smart, attractive and nice fall for guys who were jerks. I used to have a best friend who was an amateur bodybuilder and so many smart, attractive, nice women would just be crazy for him. I mean they could just blush from being around him and I know he was dating more than one of them at the same time. I wasn't a christian back then so I really didn't care what he did.
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how smart are they if they don't pick up on the fact he is cheating on them?
 
then they need a lesson on "How to know your man is cheatin' on you" or "how to recognize a faithful mate" list.

My friends compiled one ages ago.

From memory:

1. He gets upset when you show up unexpectedly to say you love him. Dropping by with a picnic lunch is sometimes a good test.

2. He wants to keep your relationship a "secret"

3. He checks out and flirts with other girls, even while you are there.

4. He lies about where he is/ he is not where he says he was going to be (this can be checked by having a friend drop by that place and reporting back)

5. he hits on your girl friends behind your back.

In high school I had a set of five girl friends and we kept it real with each other. Luckily we were so different that we never fell for the same guy. Even if we did we had a policy of NEVER dating a guy who went out with one of our other friends. relationships like that never end well and often cause the breakup of a great friendship.

we had clear lines we would not tolerate from men as well.

If he pressured you for sex. (firm believer that high school students should NOT be having sex)

If he ever HIT you.

and more but my have to take kids to school. ttyl.
 
They were brainwashed by Jane Austen & the like into thinking they can change their own Darcy.

And, as iTore would point out, here comes the backlash to that in 3...2...1...
:D
 
Ariel82 said:
Doubtful.

Sometimes "nice" guys aren't really nice. they just bottle up their emotions and come off as Fake.

Other times "nice" guys go into a meeting with the idea that either THEY or the WOMAN aren't good enough to have an enduring relationship. Causing them to fail before even the first date.

Sometimes people don't pick up the signs that the other person is interested.

Other times the guy is so self concious and insecure that its a warning sign that says "major emotional baggage and unforgiveness, date at your own risk"
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Well I've been told by a female friend that I'm a gentleman and can't understand why I'm not at least dating.

My boss from last year told my current boss I'm a sweetheart. Both are female.
 
Ariel82 said:
then they need a lesson on "How to know your man is cheatin' on you" or "how to recognize a faithful mate" list.

My friends compiled one ages ago.

From memory:

1. He gets upset when you show up unexpectedly to say you love him. Dropping by with a picnic lunch is sometimes a good test.

2. He wants to keep your relationship a "secret"

3. He checks out and flirts with other girls, even while you are there.

4. He lies about where he is/ he is not where he says he was going to be (this can be checked by having a friend drop by that place and reporting back)

5. he hits on your girl friends behind your back.

In high school I had a set of five girl friends and we kept it real with each other. Luckily we were so different that we never fell for the same guy. Even if we did we had a policy of NEVER dating a guy who went out with one of our other friends. relationships like that never end well and often cause the breakup of a great friendship.

we had clear lines we would not tolerate from men as well.

If he pressured you for sex. (firm believer that high school students should NOT be having sex)

If he ever HIT you.

and more but my have to take kids to school. ttyl.
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Oohhhh actually I knew two girls who did find out and they hated him. They even tried to do cruel things to him. One of them put a used cigarette butt in a slice of pizza he was going to eat at a party and she begged me not to tell him but I did (I couldn't let him eat it). The other girl just liked telling everyone what she thought of him...and she was actually a girlfriend of mine in high school :/
 
FireWire said:
ǝlɐɯǝɟ ǝɹɐ ɥʇoq ˙ʇɹɐǝɥʇǝǝʍs ɐ ɯ,I ssoq ʇuǝɹɹnɔ ʎɯ ploʇ ɹɐǝʎ ʇsɐl ɯoɹɟ ssoq ʎW

˙ƃuıʇɐp ʇsɐǝl ʇɐ ʇou ɯ,I ʎɥʍ puɐʇsɹǝpun ʇ,uɐɔ puɐ uɐɯǝlʇuǝƃ ɐ ɯ,I ʇɐɥʇ puǝıɹɟ ǝlɐɯǝɟ ɐ ʎq ploʇ uǝǝq ǝʌ,I llǝM.
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Friend Zone is for another thread....

I am just teasing you... :p
 
Oh man do we Americans have a lot to teach you New Zealand People...

Friend-Zone-2.png
friendzone-12.jpg
 
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I understood that women want a guy who listens. Actually been told this by said boss from last year. So it must be true...women like jerks more!!
 
Lol @ that pic, T

My guesses as to where the attraction comes from..

Not wanting to be alone?
Seeking thrills?
The idea of being the one lady who can tame the jerk?
Some kind of beauty and the beast stockholm syndrome complex?
Maybe its as simple as he's just really physically attractive

Who knows.
 
SeatBelt said:
They were brainwashed by Jane Austen & the like into thinking they can change their own Darcy.

And, as iTore would point out, here comes the backlash to that in 3...2...1...
:D
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LOL! I hear prince charming but never Mr. Darcy, I forgot about him. When I hear women say, I want a Prince, like Prince's are Perfect. Prince Charles was a jerk to his wife, Prince Andrew and his wife are divorced. Princes fart, burp and snore like the rest of the world. Marry a regular guy, there is less chance for a beheading.
 
I used to exclusively date jerks. Because I used to be so smart.

Part of the attraction is definitely thinking "I will be the one who changes him!" Except obviously, that never works. But more than that, it was me thinking, "I will be the one that he WANTS to change for."

Funny how several of those guys would tell me "You make me want to be a better man" (ok, first, these were Boys, not men, and also big whiny babies, so that alone makes me laugh....also, GET SOME ORIGINAL LINES! Ahem...sorry...) but then, of course, nothing ever changed.

So, that leaves me with...no real good answer to your question :D
 
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