J
Spiritual Event ~ Heartache and Tears
I am going to share an experience that had Spiritual outcome.
Wondering if anyone else has had a deep emotional experience?
We had decided to get a dog. It could not be just any dog. I had
to bond with it to know it would be our life companion. We answered
ads, went to homes to see the puppies, but nothing clicked. We knew
we wanted a Poodle, small to medium size.
Finally we found an ad in our local paper and the home that had a
couple of puppies was not far from us. We called, made appt. and
went to see the 2 puppies. The lady went to a room and brought
out one and I held him, but he just didn't feel right. So she said I
have a little girl, his sister. She brought out another cute little
puppy and I held her as we talked and she just stayed so quiet and
felt sooo right. Finally, I looked down at her and said.... "You
look like a Babbette to me." She just looked at me and that did
it. She was in my heart right then.
We brought her home and it was frigid temps. In the 20's and my
husband was not going to have paper trained dog. She was going
to learn to go out doors. It was 20 degrees, and he put her out,
much to my dismay.... but you know what? She used the bathroom.
She was house broken from that time on.
Okay we had the best behaved and loving Babbette, she just was
like one of our children. She traveled with me to visit my husband
when he worked out of town. She would sit outside with me on
Friday evenings, waiting for his truck to come up the highway,
home from work. She knew the sound of that truck. When he
pulled in the drive way she would run to him, run in circles and
run and get her stuffed toy for him to play with her. She was
the light of our life.
Years go by and my husband was working out of town and had
to rent a home, and it worked out because Babbette could go
with me to visit her daddy. She eventually had cataracts and
unbelievable, but she could find her way around both homes
even though she went blind. The day came however, the landlord
needed to sell the home my husband was renting and we had to
find another place to live. People did not want to rent with pets.
She by this time 15 years later was beginning to lose control of
her bodily functions. She had an enlarged heart and could not
eat, and I would try to give her water out of my hand.
We knew we were going to have to make the decision to let her
go. We were sitting on the sofa at his house and we both were
already grieving at the decision. I remember, as she lay between
us, saying, "give mommy kisses Babbie", and she licked my
hand like a dozen times. It was as if she knew it was her last
time she would be here.
The day came we had to find an apartment and they did not
allow pets, even for 2 nights. And Babbette would not have
been able to find her way around as she was really at the end
stages of her life. The heartache was more than I can share
with you. My husband and I knew what we had to do since
she was no longer able to hold her bodily function and she
could hardly walk. The decision had to be made. She would
have to be put to sleep. There are no words to describe the
anguish of making that decision. The bad part was I had
called the Vet on Monday, and had to wait until Friday eve.
I fixed her a place on the sofa here at home on her favorite
blanket. She just lay there sleeping. Could barely raise her
head. I would try to give her water, but she could hardly
lick my hand. That was my week of grief like I had never
known. I would walk by her, drop to my knees and weep,
and kept saying " I am so sorry Babbie, I am so sorry."
She just lay there. I prayed and asked God to take her in
her sleep. Please, Lord ? Please don't make us do this to
her. Let her just go to sleep, please ? But, God had other
plans, and I had 5 days of grieving and sobbing and I said
never again would I go through that heartache.
She was our baby. No other dog would have the same traits
she had. No other dog could love us as she did, nor be as
well trained. She was ours for 15 years.
Friday night came and my husband came home from being
out of town and his heart was as torn and broken as mine.
We both cried as we wrapped her in her pink blanket to go
to the Vet. I held her on my lap and she just slept all the
way to the Vets office and I cried all the way there. After
we got in the office and took our seat, we had to wait until
the Vet was finished seeing his last patient, I think because
of the nature of our visit, he did not want someone come in
and see what was going to happen. Our son came immediately
after work, and he came to hold her one more time. We
each held her, and even now 16 yrs later I still feel her in
my arms.
The tech came out to get Babbette, I was holding her. I had
to hand her over to the tech.... I still can't write about it without
tears streaming. The tech took her and she started to turn to
leave the room, I said wait ! The tech was like, uh oh, but I
just wanted to kiss Babbette on the forehead one last time.
I went to the car and waited, my husband and son went to
back where the Vet would bring Babbie out, and they waited,
and finally he brought her to them, wrapped up in her pink
blanket. My husband brought her to me and I held her on
my lap until we got home. Her little lifeless body still warm.
We had a metal box my husband had fixed years before that
for just that time we would need it for her. It was lined and
ready to hold her body. He and our son dug her grave
and she was buried with her little stuffed toy, and another
favorite blanket.
Grief is indescribable for every person. I went down to her
grave on Sat. , Sun. nite, to say good night to her and tell
her I loved her. Monday night I went down to say good
night because I was going to go to be with my husband for
couple of days. My first trip without her. When I went
to her grave, an odor of death came up at me. I heard
in my spirit, "She is dead Judy." It was as if God had to
cause me to realize grief was not going to bring her back,
and help me to accept the fact she was gone, and not to
get in habit of going to say good nite to a deceased pet.
I called my neighbor and asked him if he had lime.
I explained I thought for some reason there is odor
coming up and should not be. He was kind enough
to go next day and put lime on her grave. He told
me there was NO ODOR at all. God used His own
way to make me understand it was finished.
I believe God gave her to us for 15 years because He
had a plan. We were blessed. There is a story that
follows along with this but too much detail to go into
now. She, "Babbette", will always be the joy of our
life. We never did replace her.
Our heart goes out to those who have had to make
the same decision. Why God did not take her in her
sleep, I don't know. There was a spiritual lesson for
me through it all. I used to think I want to see her
in Heaven, but I am okay now if there are no pets
we owned in Heaven. We were given 15 years of
great happiness and love no other pet could give.
Thank You Lord, for Your guidance and love in time
of need.
J~K~2
I am going to share an experience that had Spiritual outcome.
Wondering if anyone else has had a deep emotional experience?
We had decided to get a dog. It could not be just any dog. I had
to bond with it to know it would be our life companion. We answered
ads, went to homes to see the puppies, but nothing clicked. We knew
we wanted a Poodle, small to medium size.
Finally we found an ad in our local paper and the home that had a
couple of puppies was not far from us. We called, made appt. and
went to see the 2 puppies. The lady went to a room and brought
out one and I held him, but he just didn't feel right. So she said I
have a little girl, his sister. She brought out another cute little
puppy and I held her as we talked and she just stayed so quiet and
felt sooo right. Finally, I looked down at her and said.... "You
look like a Babbette to me." She just looked at me and that did
it. She was in my heart right then.
We brought her home and it was frigid temps. In the 20's and my
husband was not going to have paper trained dog. She was going
to learn to go out doors. It was 20 degrees, and he put her out,
much to my dismay.... but you know what? She used the bathroom.
She was house broken from that time on.
Okay we had the best behaved and loving Babbette, she just was
like one of our children. She traveled with me to visit my husband
when he worked out of town. She would sit outside with me on
Friday evenings, waiting for his truck to come up the highway,
home from work. She knew the sound of that truck. When he
pulled in the drive way she would run to him, run in circles and
run and get her stuffed toy for him to play with her. She was
the light of our life.
Years go by and my husband was working out of town and had
to rent a home, and it worked out because Babbette could go
with me to visit her daddy. She eventually had cataracts and
unbelievable, but she could find her way around both homes
even though she went blind. The day came however, the landlord
needed to sell the home my husband was renting and we had to
find another place to live. People did not want to rent with pets.
She by this time 15 years later was beginning to lose control of
her bodily functions. She had an enlarged heart and could not
eat, and I would try to give her water out of my hand.
We knew we were going to have to make the decision to let her
go. We were sitting on the sofa at his house and we both were
already grieving at the decision. I remember, as she lay between
us, saying, "give mommy kisses Babbie", and she licked my
hand like a dozen times. It was as if she knew it was her last
time she would be here.
The day came we had to find an apartment and they did not
allow pets, even for 2 nights. And Babbette would not have
been able to find her way around as she was really at the end
stages of her life. The heartache was more than I can share
with you. My husband and I knew what we had to do since
she was no longer able to hold her bodily function and she
could hardly walk. The decision had to be made. She would
have to be put to sleep. There are no words to describe the
anguish of making that decision. The bad part was I had
called the Vet on Monday, and had to wait until Friday eve.
I fixed her a place on the sofa here at home on her favorite
blanket. She just lay there sleeping. Could barely raise her
head. I would try to give her water, but she could hardly
lick my hand. That was my week of grief like I had never
known. I would walk by her, drop to my knees and weep,
and kept saying " I am so sorry Babbie, I am so sorry."
She just lay there. I prayed and asked God to take her in
her sleep. Please, Lord ? Please don't make us do this to
her. Let her just go to sleep, please ? But, God had other
plans, and I had 5 days of grieving and sobbing and I said
never again would I go through that heartache.
She was our baby. No other dog would have the same traits
she had. No other dog could love us as she did, nor be as
well trained. She was ours for 15 years.
Friday night came and my husband came home from being
out of town and his heart was as torn and broken as mine.
We both cried as we wrapped her in her pink blanket to go
to the Vet. I held her on my lap and she just slept all the
way to the Vets office and I cried all the way there. After
we got in the office and took our seat, we had to wait until
the Vet was finished seeing his last patient, I think because
of the nature of our visit, he did not want someone come in
and see what was going to happen. Our son came immediately
after work, and he came to hold her one more time. We
each held her, and even now 16 yrs later I still feel her in
my arms.
The tech came out to get Babbette, I was holding her. I had
to hand her over to the tech.... I still can't write about it without
tears streaming. The tech took her and she started to turn to
leave the room, I said wait ! The tech was like, uh oh, but I
just wanted to kiss Babbette on the forehead one last time.
I went to the car and waited, my husband and son went to
back where the Vet would bring Babbie out, and they waited,
and finally he brought her to them, wrapped up in her pink
blanket. My husband brought her to me and I held her on
my lap until we got home. Her little lifeless body still warm.
We had a metal box my husband had fixed years before that
for just that time we would need it for her. It was lined and
ready to hold her body. He and our son dug her grave
and she was buried with her little stuffed toy, and another
favorite blanket.
Grief is indescribable for every person. I went down to her
grave on Sat. , Sun. nite, to say good night to her and tell
her I loved her. Monday night I went down to say good
night because I was going to go to be with my husband for
couple of days. My first trip without her. When I went
to her grave, an odor of death came up at me. I heard
in my spirit, "She is dead Judy." It was as if God had to
cause me to realize grief was not going to bring her back,
and help me to accept the fact she was gone, and not to
get in habit of going to say good nite to a deceased pet.
I called my neighbor and asked him if he had lime.
I explained I thought for some reason there is odor
coming up and should not be. He was kind enough
to go next day and put lime on her grave. He told
me there was NO ODOR at all. God used His own
way to make me understand it was finished.
I believe God gave her to us for 15 years because He
had a plan. We were blessed. There is a story that
follows along with this but too much detail to go into
now. She, "Babbette", will always be the joy of our
life. We never did replace her.
Our heart goes out to those who have had to make
the same decision. Why God did not take her in her
sleep, I don't know. There was a spiritual lesson for
me through it all. I used to think I want to see her
in Heaven, but I am okay now if there are no pets
we owned in Heaven. We were given 15 years of
great happiness and love no other pet could give.
Thank You Lord, for Your guidance and love in time
of need.
J~K~2
Anyway, fast-forward through 2000. Rusty was doing ok, he was happy and he loved his mummy. And I loved him dearly. In about March or April of 2001, he started having more seizures, he lost weight in his hindquarters, he pretty much still ate and drank but he started becoming incontinent with his bowels. He would come up to me all the time, sit in front of me and just stare at me with these beautiful golden eyes of his. They were sad but wise eyes, and I knew he was trying to tell me I needed to let him go. I'm actually crying right now as I write this.