Re: Do The "Things We're Looking For" Lists Make You Feel Like No One Is Looking For
Well, I think that a few years ago they would have made me feel inadequate. Sometimes I still do feel that way, though it has less to do with lists and more to do with how I view myself.
That aside, I think I'm just...happy where I'm at. So, if I don't meet all of the qualifications on someone's list, I don't really care. I'm not going to change just to fit a list. If I had to change major things about myself, am I really a match for that person, anyway?
I've liked several guys with fairly different personalities and backgrounds. They had a few similar qualities, I suppose (the important ones). Granted, my crushes never became a relationship (nor have I been in one to know) so I can't say that I know whether or not it would have actually worked out.
I think there's a difference between what you need, want, and prefer. And from person to person, the same quality may be on a different part of the "list". For example, I would NEED my future husband to be family-oriented, but for someone else, that may only be a preference, but wouldn't overall affect the relationship if they weren't because they weren't that interested in having kids.
I dunno, I guess I'm just feeling pretty chill about my singleness (I think the DST hour loss has gotten to my brain) so to answer the original question, someone else's list does not bother me.