This would all be well and good except that the apparently the Bible doesn't actually contain a list of dos and donts outside of having sex before mattiage when it comes to physical intimacy in a relationship. Hence why there are so many different views of whats OK beforehand be it kissing, hugging, or those awkward creepy no touching things. So maybe be less condescending and try helping people when they have a question instead of blindly dismissing them and giving little to no information.
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I've been thinking about how I and future boyfriends can stay sexually pure in relationships. I wanted some insight into how young Christian males would feel about my relationship preferences, and I also wanted to find out their own preferences. I've created a survey, which isn't the best in the world lol, but I'd really appreciate it if you could answer as honestly as you can.
https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/2DXDPMV
Thank you very much
https://www.surveymonkey.com/r/2DXDPMV
Thank you very much
A
I'm going to weigh in on this. I believe the survey is appropriate for young adults (but not minors). Honestly, I could use such a survey as a teaching and evangelistic tool to help young people see where they are at and where scripture teaches them they still need to go.
It's unfortunate that young adults find themselves literally immersed at present in a civilization in rapid moral decline, many through no fault of their own, and it is desirable for them to understand and talk about this world they've been birthed into and with a goal toward gaining a correct understanding of God's moral design and purpose for their lives and how to better align with that.
It's unfortunate that young adults find themselves literally immersed at present in a civilization in rapid moral decline, many through no fault of their own, and it is desirable for them to understand and talk about this world they've been birthed into and with a goal toward gaining a correct understanding of God's moral design and purpose for their lives and how to better align with that.
A
Says the "progressive" who was condoning marital anal sodomy in previous posts.
In addition to scripture mandating fornication, adultery, homosexuality, incest, etc... as sexual immorality, you've obviously not read the passages which mandate particular sex acts as sin.
Let's take your fav as an example. In the Old Testament, sodomy refers to men lying with men. The Old English word means “Unnatural sexual intercourse, especially of one man with another or of a human being with an animal.”
But also scripture defines sexual immoralities associated with temple prostitution, which included male on female sodomy, as sexually immoral activities. This isn't surprising as God’s intent is for men and women to marry each other and have normal sexual relations within the bonds of marriage and anal sex is not normal sexual intercourse.
Instead of always trying to be as immoral as possible Nautilus, within the bounds of what you think is morality, how about trying the opposite approach for a change: try to be as holy as possible.
In addition to scripture mandating fornication, adultery, homosexuality, incest, etc... as sexual immorality, you've obviously not read the passages which mandate particular sex acts as sin.
Let's take your fav as an example. In the Old Testament, sodomy refers to men lying with men. The Old English word means “Unnatural sexual intercourse, especially of one man with another or of a human being with an animal.”
But also scripture defines sexual immoralities associated with temple prostitution, which included male on female sodomy, as sexually immoral activities. This isn't surprising as God’s intent is for men and women to marry each other and have normal sexual relations within the bonds of marriage and anal sex is not normal sexual intercourse.
Instead of always trying to be as immoral as possible Nautilus, within the bounds of what you think is morality, how about trying the opposite approach for a change: try to be as holy as possible.
I think on this one point neither of us is going to change the others mind. Im all for free sexual exploration between a man and a woman within the bonds of marriage while you have your own opinion on this topic. Im okay with that personally. I wouldn't tell you how to sleep with your wife and I expect the same.
sorry, but you don't get to declare yourself more holy, or of greater moral fiber simply because you've chosen to create additional rules and boundaries for what is appropriate inside the boundaries of marriage.
as long as both parties agree, free from coercion, tactics and any abusive or disrespectful behavior, what goes on in the marriage bed of a married wife and husband is their business alone.
i think there is a very clear reason why God has chosen to give us the principles of how to conduct ourselves inside marriage, including a picture of what ideal marriage should resemble, and has even provided us the information how to "govern" and conduct matters/business within the union.
and yet, He has provided so very little information as to what is (sexually) actually allowable inside the boundaries of holy marriage. i don't think that was an accident. : )
Same with almost all matters of holiness. We have standards based on principles in the Bible, not a list of rules from the Bible. There are a (very) few things specifically outlined but God mostly gave us the spirit of the law, not the letter of the law.
Of course that's why people argue so much about standards. They interpret principles different and apply them to various standards (or lack thereof) different.
Of course that's why people argue so much about standards. They interpret principles different and apply them to various standards (or lack thereof) different.
Once again you still think your interpretation is right and the only one, while not realizing most other people aren't going to agree with you 100% of the time. I think this bothers you. Especially considering your reasoning is mostly inference from verses about 'temple porstitutes' when the Bible never actually mentions the act in question in a heterosexual relationship thus meaning your personal opinion of it being wrong is just that personal.
BologneseBirmie: i know that you just want to know what Christian man here think about relationship male-female.. i understood that you want to compare your own standards with the result.. Maybe you just worried and want to know if you put your own standard too high and very different with the result and worried if you'll make your future bf dissapointed at you???
If you have a strong principles you'll not having such dilemma and wondering anymore and yes, it need a lot of process, spending more time to read bible and pray to God.. as the time goes by it will help you to know what is right and what is not to do in a relationship..
The survey is no use for me.. its good to know what mostly people here think but will not change my own standard (i hope you do the same if you already have your own standard)..
Lets say i have standard that i would not date a smoker and a drinker (just an example) BUT on your own mind you think nothing wrong with that.. when you ask me to fill the survey i'll say NO and walk away for sure.. while you?? after you know my answer on that survey can you apply it to your own life when a very handsome guy, kind, good christian BUT a smoker and a drinker trying to approach you??
of course not.. you'll having dilemma..
If you have strong standard you can decided what to do.. if there is a man who try to approach you but not match with your own standard you'll walk away..
again, its not an easy thing.. feeling can be trouble too..
I'm here not trying to let you down but i just hope that you spend more time in reading and praying and growing so you have a strong principles and ready to have a relationship and i'm sorry if maybe some of my words has offend you.. thats not my intention.. we are learning and growing everyday
Best wishes for you ^_^
If you have a strong principles you'll not having such dilemma and wondering anymore and yes, it need a lot of process, spending more time to read bible and pray to God.. as the time goes by it will help you to know what is right and what is not to do in a relationship..
The survey is no use for me.. its good to know what mostly people here think but will not change my own standard (i hope you do the same if you already have your own standard)..
Lets say i have standard that i would not date a smoker and a drinker (just an example) BUT on your own mind you think nothing wrong with that.. when you ask me to fill the survey i'll say NO and walk away for sure.. while you?? after you know my answer on that survey can you apply it to your own life when a very handsome guy, kind, good christian BUT a smoker and a drinker trying to approach you??
of course not.. you'll having dilemma..
If you have strong standard you can decided what to do.. if there is a man who try to approach you but not match with your own standard you'll walk away..
again, its not an easy thing.. feeling can be trouble too..
I'm here not trying to let you down but i just hope that you spend more time in reading and praying and growing so you have a strong principles and ready to have a relationship
and i'm sorry if maybe some of my words has offend you.. thats not my intention.. we are learning and growing everyday Best wishes for you ^_^
I think that if your survey had more clinical terms for some of the acts mentioned instead of their "street names," things might have gone over better. But, I think it's too late to delete or change - you will have to request a mod do that for you.
As for the survey itself, I think it's wise to research what you may find out in the world while you are dating.
As for the survey itself, I think it's wise to research what you may find out in the world while you are dating.
M
If you actually were to read all of my previous posts you will no doubt see that far from
being condescending, I was rather concerned about the OP.
No age was stated and so they could therefore have been as young as 13 years of
age. The type of terminology used suggested the OP was a young person and I
was right. The OP later stated they were 19 but they could very easily have been 15-16.
Do you think it is appropriate for complete strangers to suggest to a young person (via
a survey) how far they would go sexually? Such a survey in the context of how it was
put together on a public forum open for anyone to see and also comment on, could
have attracted all sorts of weirdos and what if the OP was the sort of person who
was easily led.
If you had a young daughter would you honestly want her to ask strangers how far it was
appropriate to go?
There are other threads on here which deal with the issue of purity etc.
Please use some descernment and think about the safety of people on here, especially
young people.
A
I'm not. You are fabricating that in your mind and then projecting it at me as if I declared myself "more holy, or of greater moral fiber simply because you've chosen to create additional rules and boundaries for what is appropriate inside the boundaries of marriage" which I never did.
You're just making stuff up and projecting it at me. What I'm asserting is that scripture reveals God's design for human sexuality in marriage which people either choose to align their behavior with or they do not. God has already set the boundaries, not me.
If you want to deny those boundaries and assert that it's moral for people to defile the marriage bed with sexual immorality, then you've deviated negatively from the truth.
It's not moral for married couples to do all sorts of things. You may feel that it's fine if they beat on each other and cut each other up in sado masochist activities or use their bodies for purposes they were never designed for but that's not in line with God's morality and design for their sexual union as revealed in scripture.
That's what I'm talking about.
You're just making stuff up and projecting it at me. What I'm asserting is that scripture reveals God's design for human sexuality in marriage which people either choose to align their behavior with or they do not. God has already set the boundaries, not me.
If you want to deny those boundaries and assert that it's moral for people to defile the marriage bed with sexual immorality, then you've deviated negatively from the truth.
It's not moral for married couples to do all sorts of things. You may feel that it's fine if they beat on each other and cut each other up in sado masochist activities or use their bodies for purposes they were never designed for but that's not in line with God's morality and design for their sexual union as revealed in scripture.
That's what I'm talking about.