Ok, a few things ^_^
Where are you getting the "unknown does not necessarily mean not sinful" thing? If God really wanted to speak out against something, he certainly would have, huh?
He might've but we don't know or have not yet discovered or have not yet figured out so you cannot assume either for or against. You can only keep in mind that it is currently unknown which isn't very helpful but that is a strict interpretation.
Also, the Jewish law, while I realize it wasn't always flawed, it still had flaws and is not a Biblical basis. Jewish custom can sometimes be used to get a clearer picture of the circumstance, but I don't think you should use it by itself in judging the sinful nature of a certain activity. Also, I believe we're ont he same page on the "honouring God" thing. Not everything you do is supposed to honour God (thought nothing is supposed to dishonour Him), and calling something honour does not change dishonouring behavior into honouring behavior.
Actually, Jewish law has biblical roots. It has been... heavily modified... but some of their older traditions have not changed much from what we are able to figure out. Those older traditions (though some may be outdated and pointless because of Jesus' death) give us insight into the nature of God - what He wants, what He sees as good or bad. For example, the shaving of one's beard is an Old Testament sin. If you look at Jewish laws & culture, to shave one's beard is a really big deal. But why is it a big deal? I mean, do you grow a giant beard today or would you shave your face regularly? (Maybe you don't have enough to shave just yet
) So you dig into it and you figure out that beard shaving was part of a pagan ritual back in ancient times. God forbade the Israelites from shaving their faces so that they would not sin against Him by partaking in this ritual. This gives us insight into God's nature.
Also, for the whole questions I have remaining thing- I knew hentai was probably wrong, but what about it makes it wrong? Is it just the general lust of women, period? And if so, that means just coming up with a 100% imaginary picture of (parts of) someone in your picture would also be wrong? Anyway, an interesting thing I've noticed, but been kinda scared to point out- the verse says adultery. Adultery implies that you are in a marriage, because otherwise it is fornication. Is there any reason to believe that this philosophy applies also to the unmarried? I'm definitely NOT trying to make a point here, I'm genuinely curious.
What you're doing is what many teens and young adults do - find the thin red line and see if there are any technicalities to work around. It may not be something you are consciously and intentionally trying to do but you end up looking for that loophole.
The great thing about being a Christian is that God puts His presence (the Holy Spirit) into you at the time of belief. God is constant (His laws, wants, desires, etc. don't change). We may not know all of His rules and laws but if He's placed His Holy Spirit within us, then He will undoubtedly help us out in a consistent manner. So you need to listen carefully. Do you feel guilt or conviction when you look at Hentai porn? Only you are most attuned to your own feelings. If deep down, you already know it is wrong, then it doesn't matter whether it is adultery, fornication, or lust because you've already committed the sin. For you then, the Holy Spirit has convicted you. What remains now is how you deal with this sin. Do you continue or do you confess it and stop?
Oftentimes (even for myself), if we already feel or know that something we do probably goes against God's laws, there's a tendency for us to look for a way out particularly if we want or desire to continue to do whatever that something is. The trick to figuring it out is discernment and sadly, that cannot be taught. It takes time, practice, and careful listening to what the Holy Spirit is telling you.
I'm sorry if I couldn't provide an easy way out for you to figure out all this stuff but the truth is, there is no easy and "get rich quick" way of growing a close relationship with God. All relationships take time and effort; growing a relationship with God is no different.
But on the bright side, it's worth putting in that effort and work!
And finally, the whole arguing thing... Yeah, I know ^_^ Unfortunately, my gf's mom declared an ultimatum and said that if she keeps seeing conflict between me and her, she is ending the relationship... I have yet to talk to my gf about this since she happens to be grounded until Friday+, but I'm just going to give my gf's mom a cold shoulder and occasionally thank her for the effort she goes through to plan trips and get Mr V to let me date her daughter... Since apparently she wasn't supposed to be in a "serious" emotional relationship like this until she was 16 (even though she could have a boyfriend at 13... The logic behind THIS one makes no sense to me XD). And- this is the hard one- I'm supposed to encourage her to give full respect to her parents even when her parents are dead wrong. Woo -.- Trying and learning, but I hate being scared to death over this whole thing =(
Oh, and to prevent a few possible confusions about what I just said, here's some info- I'm 17, she's 15. Our B-days are right around standard school entrance cut-off dates in September. I barely missed the cut, but got in anyway since my parents taught me advanced stuff like multiplication before kindergarten XD Her birth parents... Not so much... Plus, she missed the date my a couple more weeks than I did, and her parents weren't very concerned about her =( She's adopted now with different parents though, so it's cool. Anyway, the point of that was explain grade difference- She's in 9th and I'm in 12th. It's hard, and even though her parents preach about how they're doing all this stuff to help us, they honestly just make it harder =/ </off-topicminirant)
You are still young. I will be fair to you - I have never been in a relationship before but I can tell you this: it is probably not a good idea to have conflict with your girlfriend's parents (or in-laws if you get that far). They are, at the end of the day, her parents and she loves them even though she may not admit it. Conflict with them will result in conflict with her because you are basically disrespecting her parents. That's my two cents but let someone else who has been in a relationship give you more advice on that.
As for respecting her parents... honour and respect are subjective thoughts. It can change depending on the person. For example, in first and second-generation conservative Asian culture, honour and respect is equated with obeying your parents' authority even when they are wrong. Of course, there are exceptions but those are far and few in between. But for Caucasians, it is different - everyone has an opinion and right. However, God calls us to honour our parents. They may not be your parents but they are her's. So you have a choice. Conflict with your girlfriend and her parents (which usually leads to a sad place) or give up your right to be "right" and honour and respect them as well. Keep in mind also that they are much older than you and have greater experience and wisdom in relationship matters.
If you truly love her, then you will do whatever it takes to make her happy. If that means giving up arguing/debating, then that may be something you will need to do. Love comes with a price, buddy. Why do you think I'm still single? LOL
As far as the college thing, I am definitely NOT going to a Christian college.
You might eat those words one day.
