An evening visiting a new church in my neighbourhood

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Mooky

Guest
#1
#1
This evening I visited a church that was not my home church.I found it it on the internet.I went there really not knowing what to expect but in great need of fellowship.
Everything was good.The people were welcoming and friendly, the sermon was encouraging and there was a yummy felowship meal afterwards consisting of spaghetti and meat sauce with chocolate brownies for dessert.
I had a great conversation with one of the older women there and felt like I had known her for years.
There was just one fly in the ointment.When it was time to greet each other,a guy who looked like he was in his 60' s sitting in my pew made a bee line for me, took my hand and kissed it.At the time it happened so quickly and unexpectedly that I didn't register until it was too late.It made me feel uncomfortable and in retrospect - I think it is pretty worldly behaviour.
What really vexes me is that if I had walked into that church with a husband this guy wouldn't have had the guts to be so forward.
Why is it that men so often feel that they can take liberties with single women - christian or not?Just because I am single doesn't mean I am available or interested in people twice my age.
I came away from this evening uplifted but wishing that I had been firmer with this persons behaviour and that I would have had quicker reflexes to have have pulled my hand away and put this chauvinist in his place.
 
Demi777

Demi777

Senior Member
#2
Oct 13, 2014
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#2
Havent had that happen to me in church so far but it has happened to me in other places. I noticed (no offence) that mostly the older men get, the less they control themselves. Now u know u gotta be prepared when you go places.
 
Willie-T

Willie-T

Banned
#3
Feb 7, 2015
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#3
I'm glad you found the determent you were looking for.
 
M

Mooky

Guest
#4
#4
Ugh! It's maddening!They probably dont even know what they are doing but it is really asserting dominance over what they deem to be the inferior gender.Or that's what it feels like.
 
Demi777

Demi777

Senior Member
#6
Oct 13, 2014
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#6
Yea somehow some forget to look into the mirror over 50 years lol. Its baffling indeed but now u can prepare for it to take action.

Mooky said:
Ugh! It's maddening!They probably dont even know what they are doing but it is really asserting dominance over what they deem to be the inferior gender.Or that's what it feels like.
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M

Mooky

Guest
#8
#8
Thanks for explaining that Willie.I will ponder this great wisdom.
 
Willie-T

Willie-T

Banned
#9
Feb 7, 2015
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#9
I usually open doors for women. And it is generally greeted with appreciation. (My wife no longer even considers opening a door for herself if she is with a man, especially me.) But some feminists no longer receive that respect from me if I can sense their attitude ahead of time. I don't need their problems in my life.
 
M

Mooky

Guest
#10
#10
Its not a matter of opening doors or feminism.It's a matter of respecting peoples boundaries.I think my OP was clear enough.
 
mailmandan

mailmandan

Senior Member
#11
Apr 7, 2014
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#11
Demi777 said:
Havent had that happen to me in church so far but it has happened to me in other places. I noticed (no offence) that mostly the older men get, the less they control themselves. Now u know u gotta be prepared when you go places.
Click to expand...
Maybe that explains why when I deliver mail in a business (particularly a fast food restaurant) and say good morning to teenage girls working there, I usually get that funny look like they are wondering why this old guy is talking to them and what my angle is. Young women seem to naturally see older men as creepers because apparently, plenty of older men have blown it for the rest of us. :eek:
 
M

Mooky

Guest
#12
#12
Not everyone is a gentleman like you, Dan.:)
 
mailmandan

mailmandan

Senior Member
#13
Apr 7, 2014
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#13
Mooky said:
When it was time to greet each other,a guy who looked like he was in his 60' s sitting in my pew made a bee line for me, took my hand and kissed it.
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I'm sorry to hear this happened to you Mooky. That was inappropriate behavior. I can see where you came away uplifted after your visit to that church -- "people were welcoming and friendly, the sermon was encouraging and there was a yummy felowship meal." Sounds great! Don't let that one knuckle head keep you from going to that church again. Just make sure you don't sit by that guy again. :)
 
Demi777

Demi777

Senior Member
#14
Oct 13, 2014
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#14
lol Usually I go to the pensioners and have coffee time with them and stuff. I generally get along better with older folks. BUT the fun ends when a 75 year old tries to grab me places and wants to drag me into bed.. I draw a big fat line there lol

mailmandan said:
Maybe that explains why when I deliver mail in a business (particularly a fast food restaurant) and say good morning to teenage girls working there, I usually get that funny look like they are wondering why this old guy is talking to them and what my angle is. Young women seem to naturally see older men as creepers because apparently, plenty of older men have blown it for the rest of us. :eek:
Click to expand...
 
mailmandan

mailmandan

Senior Member
#15
Apr 7, 2014
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Demi777 said:
lBUT the fun ends when a 75 year old tries to grab me places and wants to drag me into bed.. I draw a big fat line there lol
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That actually happened?! It did not bother him one bit that you are a teenager? Some old guys have no moral compass at all. :eek:
 
Willie-T

Willie-T

Banned
#16
Feb 7, 2015
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#16
Some women seriously need to see what is really in the mirror when they look in there. LOL
 
M

Mooky

Guest
#17
#17
My mirror is the bible.Thank you all the same.
 
Demi777

Demi777

Senior Member
#18
Oct 13, 2014
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#18
the youngest was in his late 40s and the oldest 75.. sickening. when my mom showed up and some other people took em aside they werent very amused (so dont think im alone on this, I do have people who step in).

mailmandan said:
That actually happened?! It did not bother him one bit that you are a teenager? Some old guys have no moral compass at all. :eek:
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M

Mooky

Guest
#19
#19
Anyway.Thanks all for your input and for allowing me to vent.
It has achieved the purpose of normalizing things for me as I came home and had no one available to share the details of my lovely evening with a twist.
 
hornetguy

hornetguy

Senior Member
#20
Jan 18, 2016
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#20
Or, perhaps he thought he was following Romans 16.... :)

Greet one another with a holy kiss. All the churches of Christ greet you.
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Seriously, though, we had a visiting preacher a couple of years ago.... VERY dynamic... a charismatic kind of guy. Most everyone really enjoyed his speaking. He touched on this scripture, and he said that he practiced it....greeting believers with a kiss.

But, he only did it with the men...not the women. Specifically for this reason. He didn't want anyone thinking anything untoward about his behavior. He said that, at the most, he would do the "side hug" with a woman. He also said that he received some funny reactions when he kissed guys on the cheek as a greeting...
 
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