Empathy

[Pilkington]

I definately believe Empathy can be taught, as it is something we are trained to be as trainee health care professionals. I think some people find it easier to be empathetic than others but it can be cultivated. The video I posted was used to challenge our thinking on the course I am doing.

 

[Depleted]

It mostly comes with life experiences too.

If you don't know what it is like to experience the death of a loved one for example,
then it can be hard to understand the effect it has on someone else. It's only when
you experience it yourself that you can fully empathise.

Not all examples have to be that extreme but you know what I mean.

I don't remember JFK being assassinated. I'm his daughter Caroline's age, so I should remember. I don't. Probably because it didn't enter into my little world.

BUT, I do remember the mule taking the wagon with his coffin in it by the White House. (I liked the mule.) And then I saw Jon-Jon saluting his daddy's coffin.

[video=youtube;Pz5waH25x4U]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Pz5waH25x4U[/video]

It broke my heart. I realized Caroline got it. Jon-Jon didn't. He had no idea Daddy wouldn't be home for dinner ever again. He had no idea that he couldn't play under Daddy's desk anymore. He had no idea he would no longer learn how to play football from Daddy. He had no idea Daddy wouldn't be there to grab him up into his arms and laugh with him or hug him. He had no idea he'd never show Daddy how well he could read.

I still had my dad. I hadn't lost anyone I knew in my family yet. But I cried.

I think empathy is to experience something another person is going through, even if you don't know it from personal experience. I knew what Dad meant. I knew Caroline got it, because I got it. And I knew Jon-Jon was too young to fully get it yet.

 

[Miri]

I thought I would post this as it sort of links in

Bad memories could be ERASED from your mind for good | Daily Mail Online

Erasing bad memories from our brains may sound like science fiction, but scientists
say that it could soon be a reality.
Researchers have targeted a small number of 'fear' neurons in mice to wipe out
traumatic memories.
They claim believe the same technique could be used in humans, although it
would come with 'huge' ethical implications.
They say that while it may help treat PTSD and drug addictions, removing
bad memories could prevent us from learning from our mistakes.


When I read this I thought, noooo. It would be such a bad thing if it ever became possible.
We learn and grow through the difficult times, we learn to overcome and character is built.
We also learn about empathy and in turn can reach out and help others.

 

[oldethennew]

we will weep with those that weep', we will rejoice with those that rejoice -
these are 'heavenly gifts' and not for the common-man,
for he lacks in sincerity and true Messiah-Love......

 

[Socreta93]

In my opinion you can teach someone why they should empathetic but it has to come from them. Alot of people confuse empathy with sympathy. Sympathy is feeling sorry for someone while empathy is putting yourselves in someones shoes and looking at their point of view. It takes practice as you have to first start by putting yourself in someone's shoes and viewing their point of view when it comes to any situation. Someone may develop it faster than others but I believe it's natural and just comes from you.

 

[oldethennew]

In my opinion you can teach someone why they should empathetic but it has to come from them. Alot of people confuse empathy with sympathy. Sympathy is feeling sorry for someone while empathy is putting yourselves in someones shoes and looking at their point of view. It takes practice as you have to first start by putting yourself in someone's shoes and viewing their point of view when it comes to any situation. Someone may develop it faster than others but I believe it's natural and just comes from you.

==================================================

Socreta,
part of your 'post' is so true, for it is NOT common to man to even have the smallest desire
to 'put themselves in another's shoes'...this is a real 'travesty', especially in today's times, when
folks tend to despise their 'neighbors'...

 

[TemporaryCircumstances]

What if someone lacks sympathy, empathy, and can't feel love towards anyone, including family

 

[oldethennew]

you are describing someone who is lost and floundering in the 'fallen-world' before
they are beckoned/called/chosen, by their Creator/Lord/Master, Jesus Christ...

 

[resurrection33]

Is empathy something you can teach or is it natural?

I think to empathize with someone is pretty much the same as loving that person. The Bible is an instruction book on how to do that. It could therefore be concluded, perhaps, that we need to learn love (or empathy). On the other hand, some people are willing to learn and others aren't.

 

[Galatea]

Compassion has a lot to do with imagination. A person who can not imagine themselves in another's situation, can have little compassion. For example, people who can not imagine themselves being homeless, cant really have a lot of compassion for the homeless. This is one reason why Christianity is so beautiful. The Bible teaches us to imagine ourselves in others' conditions- "There, but for the grace of God, go I." We could ALL every one of us, be drug addicts, homeless, murderers, thieves, etc. We can imagine ourselves without Christ and can see where our own sinful steps could take us.

 

[Laish]

What if someone lacks sympathy, empathy, and can't feel love towards anyone, including family

You get a sociopath . They are scary people. I worked for the maricopia country sheriffs office some 25 years back . I ran in to two people that were sociopaths. They both lacked sympathy, empathy, and the capacity to love . Both were charming and both had killed multiple times . I don't believe either had a feeling of guilt for what the did . They were the closest things to pure evil I had seen in my life .
Blessings
Bill

 

[TemporaryCircumstances]

You get a sociopath . They are scary people. I worked for the maricopia country sheriffs office some 25 years back . I ran in to two people that were sociopaths. They both lacked sympathy, empathy, and the capacity to love . Both were charming and both had killed multiple times . I don't believe either had a feeling of guilt for what the did . They were the closest things to pure evil I had seen in my life .
Blessings
Bill

What if it is a child?

 

[Laish]

What if it is a child?

Scary to think about that . I am not a expert on when a person becomes a sociopath or is born that way . If I did suspected that a child was one . I would get him or her Christ centered Psychological help as soon as I could .I hate to say it but I would not turn my back on that child ever.
Blessings
Bill

 

[TemporaryCircumstances]

Scary to think about that . I am not a expert on when a person becomes a sociopath or is born that way . If I did suspected that a child was one . I would get him or her Christ centered Psychological help as soon as I could .I hate to say it but I would not turn my back on that child ever.
Blessings
Bill

May I PM you?

 

[Laish]

May I PM you?

Not a problem Go ahead .
blessings
Bill

 

[WineRose]

I think that it can definitely be taught. I have Asperger's Syndrome. It's now barely noticeable, but it used to be much worse. One of the symptoms I had, among being very sensitive to loud noises and not understanding common social cues, was a lack of empathy, as I have a different brain from most people. Fortunately, I got help when I was 3, and now I talk and act almost like a neurotypical. My lack of empathy was among the hardest things to improve for me, and I still slip up and say inappropriate things sometimes, but now it's much better. So I would say yes, it CAN be taught, at least to some extent.

 

[Depleted]

What if someone lacks sympathy, empathy, and can't feel love towards anyone, including family

That's called "sociopath." If you've ever seen The Big Bang Theory, Sheldon is a sociopath.

But be careful in thinking that's what's wrong with someone, especially since you're a teenager. People grow into who they are, and most of that growing is in the second decade of life. We try to figure out who we want to be, and try on different styles. Then we pick out what's effective in those styles, and might latch onto some of it for a while. I was melodramatic as a kid. As a teen, I tried being cool, calm, and collected. I tried to be the type of person to hold my emotions close to the vest, so no one could guess them.

In high school, I moved every summer, so I had the opportunity to try different personalities every year. By my senior year, I was trying that one. We had moved into the new house a couple of days before. Two girls my age came to introduce themselves and invite me out with them for the day. Inner-Lynnie was flipping out with joy. This was the first time I didn't have to work to find friends. Outer-Lynnie played it cool, calm, and collected. Like this kind of thing happened every day.

A few weeks later, we were walking to school together and one of them told me that I scared them. They expected a better reaction, but I gave them no reaction. I think my Inner-Lynnie must have slipped out somewhere along the line, or she probably wouldn't have told me that. lol

 

[Depleted]

You get a sociopath . They are scary people. I worked for the maricopia country sheriffs office some 25 years back . I ran in to two people that were sociopaths. They both lacked sympathy, empathy, and the capacity to love . Both were charming and both had killed multiple times . I don't believe either had a feeling of guilt for what the did . They were the closest things to pure evil I had seen in my life .
Blessings
Bill

Sounds like they were psychopaths, not sociopaths.

 

[Depleted]

I think that it can definitely be taught. I have Asperger's Syndrome. It's now barely noticeable, but it used to be much worse. One of the symptoms I had, among being very sensitive to loud noises and not understanding common social cues, was a lack of empathy, as I have a different brain from most people. Fortunately, I got help when I was 3, and now I talk and act almost like a neurotypical. My lack of empathy was among the hardest things to improve for me, and I still slip up and say inappropriate things sometimes, but now it's much better. So I would say yes, it CAN be taught, at least to some extent.

Neurotypicals slip up and say inappropriate things too.

 

[Hungry]

God hard wired us with some learning programming. They discovered that when we watch certain individuals, especially in our close circles, we neurologically experience the same thing they do. By sticking electrodes in the brains of monkeys they saw that when the monkeys watched other monkeys eat, or whatever it fired the same corresponding neurons in their own brains. They called them mirror neurons. The reaction was more prevalent among closely related primates, like parents and offspring or younger to older but less older to younger. This makes perfect sense when you look at the how we react when we see somebody get their hand burnt, we wince. When a child scores a goal, or misses the goal, the parent reacts accordingly. The conclusions can be drawn that we learn from those close to us, and in authority, but not subordinate. If we see someone as less of an authority we have less of learning connectivity. This is empathy.

Also the brain is always trying to seek balance. If it experiences too much excitement or not enough, it adjusts. It "throttles" the receptors accordingly. If you present too much excitement to your brain with chemicals like cocaine or video games it causes your brain to become less receptive to excitement. This results in depression and you have to continually increase the excitement until the point where no excitement is enough, enter depression. The opposite is true as well. If you have a crappy life and nothing to do, your brain will adapt and cause excitement with very little. Many stand up comedians came from impoverished, or abusive circumstances. It's God's way of allowing us to be happy with less.

There is direct relation with things like watching movies but to cut through the chase, our brain adapts to experience. If we experience continual, physical and emotional trauma, our brain disconnects from emotion. Then you get sociopathic behaviour. I think that these people are so starving for any form of emotion that they turn to causing the extreme pain of others to get just a tingle for themselves. Narcissistic behaviour I believe is the result from having one parent that has nothing but praise and the other who has nothing but criticism. This leaves the individual with extreme insecurities, protected by outer self who is seemingly accomplished. They work hard to keep up appearances. If there is any challenge to this facade, the individual will lash out to any degree to conceal the weak, fallible self. These people look like they have it all together, and seek controllable mates. They look like perfect parents then in private become abusive.