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Narcissistic personality disorder — one of several types of personality disorders — is a mental condition in which people have an inflated sense of their own importance, a deep need for excessive attention and admiration, troubled relationships, and a lack of empathy for others. But behind this mask of extreme confidence lies a fragile self-esteem that's vulnerable to the slightest criticism.
A narcissistic personality disorder causes problems in many areas of life, such as relationships, work, school or financial affairs. People with narcissistic personality disorder may be generally unhappy and disappointed when they're not given the special favors or admiration they believe they deserve. They may find their relationships unfulfilling, and others may not enjoy being around them.
Treatment for narcissistic personality disorder centers around talk therapy (psychotherapy).
Signs and symptoms of narcissistic personality disorder and the severity of symptoms vary. People with the disorder can:
People with narcissistic personality disorder may not want to think that anything could be wrong, so they may be unlikely to seek treatment. If they do seek treatment, it's more likely to be for symptoms of depression, drug or alcohol use, or another mental health problem. But perceived insults to self-esteem may make it difficult to accept and follow through with treatment.
If you recognize aspects of your personality that are common to narcissistic personality disorder or you're feeling overwhelmed by sadness, consider reaching out to a trusted doctor or mental health provider. Getting the right treatment can help make your life more rewarding and enjoyable.
Request an Appointment at Mayo Clinic
Causes
It's not known what causes narcissistic personality disorder. As with personality development and with other mental health disorders, the cause of narcissistic personality disorder is likely complex. Narcissistic personality disorder may be linked to:
Narcissistic personality disorder affects more males than females, and it often begins in the teens or early adulthood. Keep in mind that, although some children may show traits of narcissism, this may simply be typical of their age and doesn't mean they'll go on to develop narcissistic personality disorder.
Although the cause of narcissistic personality disorder isn't known, some researchers think that in biologically vulnerable children, parenting styles that are overprotective or neglectful may have an impact. Genetics and neurobiology also may play a role in development of narcissistic personality disorder.
Complications
Complications of narcissistic personality disorder, and other conditions that can occur along with it, can include:
Because the cause of narcissistic personality disorder is unknown, there's no known way to prevent the condition. However, it may help to:
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Narcissistic personality disorder
A narcissistic personality disorder causes problems in many areas of life, such as relationships, work, school or financial affairs. People with narcissistic personality disorder may be generally unhappy and disappointed when they're not given the special favors or admiration they believe they deserve. They may find their relationships unfulfilling, and others may not enjoy being around them.
Treatment for narcissistic personality disorder centers around talk therapy (psychotherapy).
Signs and symptoms of narcissistic personality disorder and the severity of symptoms vary. People with the disorder can:
- Have an exaggerated sense of self-importance
- Have a sense of entitlement and require constant, excessive admiration
- Expect to be recognized as superior even without achievements that warrant it
- Exaggerate achievements and talents
- Be preoccupied with fantasies about success, power, brilliance, beauty or the perfect mate
- Believe they are superior and can only associate with equally special people
- Monopolize conversations and belittle or look down on people they perceive as inferior
- Expect special favors and unquestioning compliance with their expectations
- Take advantage of others to get what they want
- Have an inability or unwillingness to recognize the needs and feelings of others
- Be envious of others and believe others envy them
- Behave in an arrogant or haughty manner, coming across as conceited, boastful and pretentious
- Insist on having the best of everything — for instance, the best car or office
- Become impatient or angry when they don't receive special treatment
- Have significant interpersonal problems and easily feel slighted
- React with rage or contempt and try to belittle the other person to make themselves appear superior
- Have difficulty regulating emotions and behavior
- Experience major problems dealing with stress and adapting to change
- Feel depressed and moody because they fall short of perfection
- Have secret feelings of insecurity, shame, vulnerability and humiliation
People with narcissistic personality disorder may not want to think that anything could be wrong, so they may be unlikely to seek treatment. If they do seek treatment, it's more likely to be for symptoms of depression, drug or alcohol use, or another mental health problem. But perceived insults to self-esteem may make it difficult to accept and follow through with treatment.
If you recognize aspects of your personality that are common to narcissistic personality disorder or you're feeling overwhelmed by sadness, consider reaching out to a trusted doctor or mental health provider. Getting the right treatment can help make your life more rewarding and enjoyable.
Request an Appointment at Mayo Clinic
Causes
It's not known what causes narcissistic personality disorder. As with personality development and with other mental health disorders, the cause of narcissistic personality disorder is likely complex. Narcissistic personality disorder may be linked to:
- Environment ― mismatches in parent-child relationships with either excessive adoration or excessive criticism that is poorly attuned to the child's experience
- Genetics ― inherited characteristics
- Neurobiology — the connection between the brain and behavior and thinking
Narcissistic personality disorder affects more males than females, and it often begins in the teens or early adulthood. Keep in mind that, although some children may show traits of narcissism, this may simply be typical of their age and doesn't mean they'll go on to develop narcissistic personality disorder.
Although the cause of narcissistic personality disorder isn't known, some researchers think that in biologically vulnerable children, parenting styles that are overprotective or neglectful may have an impact. Genetics and neurobiology also may play a role in development of narcissistic personality disorder.
Complications
Complications of narcissistic personality disorder, and other conditions that can occur along with it, can include:
- Relationship difficulties
- Problems at work or school
- Depression and anxiety
- Physical health problems
- Drug or alcohol misuse
- Suicidal thoughts or behavior
Because the cause of narcissistic personality disorder is unknown, there's no known way to prevent the condition. However, it may help to:
- Get treatment as soon as possible for childhood mental health problems
- Participate in family therapy to learn healthy ways to communicate or to cope with conflicts or emotional distress
- Attend parenting classes and seek guidance from therapists or social workers if needed
Related
Associated Procedures
Narcissistic personality disorder
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[QUOTE="Silverwings]"I just read more of the thread and I believe you are much better off without this woman, she sounds like a narcissist, and I do not believe that they ever change. If so would be to continue in misery from now on, that does not sound like a good recipe for happiness .[/QUOTE]
She definitely has symptoms of narcissism. She always accused me of being a narcissist as well (she projected constantly). I think at times I acted in ways that could be construed as narcissistic, but doesn't everyone at some time? I have yet to meet the perfectly humble person.
She displayed more of this condition in my opinion after living with her for three years: https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/diseases/9784-paranoid-personality-disorder
I imagined her the entire time we've been separated as staying up half the night waiting for me to break into our home and hurt her even though I've never been physically abusive to her in our entire marriage. I'd almost bet on it.
But yes, I love her dearly. I also believe in God's version of marriage and not just leaving someone because of a hard time. If she had cancer and I left her, everyone would call me a villain, but with mental illness, people say otherwise.
She definitely has symptoms of narcissism. She always accused me of being a narcissist as well (she projected constantly). I think at times I acted in ways that could be construed as narcissistic, but doesn't everyone at some time? I have yet to meet the perfectly humble person.
She displayed more of this condition in my opinion after living with her for three years: https://my.clevelandclinic.org/health/diseases/9784-paranoid-personality-disorder
I imagined her the entire time we've been separated as staying up half the night waiting for me to break into our home and hurt her even though I've never been physically abusive to her in our entire marriage. I'd almost bet on it.
But yes, I love her dearly. I also believe in God's version of marriage and not just leaving someone because of a hard time. If she had cancer and I left her, everyone would call me a villain, but with mental illness, people say otherwise.
It's possible, but I can assure you I'm not happy when making extreme sacrifices for my wife. In fact I'd say it's just the opposite. I'd be happy if she was not putting me in a position to make extreme sacrifices. I actually didn't plan my entire life around pleasing my wife. That might have been why she was so upset with me at times. Many times in our marriage, I wanted to open up our home to Bible study and outreach and she would always shy away from it. She basically didn't trust men coming into the home that she didn't know that could later break in and hurt her or my daughter or something. I personally believe she didn't want people to be around her disabled son because he can be annoying if you don't know his personality quirks.
I've been through divorce and all that before. I really don't want to go through it again. I deeply love my wife and like Christ loved the church and gave Himself for it, I haven't given up on her. I can't tell you how many times I've failed Christ and He has taken me back and hasn't abandoned me, I won't abandon her if there is even a slight chance for reconciliation.
I've been through divorce and all that before. I really don't want to go through it again. I deeply love my wife and like Christ loved the church and gave Himself for it, I haven't given up on her. I can't tell you how many times I've failed Christ and He has taken me back and hasn't abandoned me, I won't abandon her if there is even a slight chance for reconciliation.
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She definitely should. And that's part of the reason I care so much. I know she will be alone without me. Whether or not that has sank in I don't know. She will never have someone that cares for her as much as I do and is willing to go through so much for her. I really don't want her to lose that. I know that I have value. Many people cannot understand why I still want to be with her when she has put me through so much, but all I can is that it's love. The thought of being with someone else makes me sick, yet being alone is also making me sad. Such a tough time to go through.
I appreciate your replies and your support. I know my wife has mental illness and most likely has paranoid personality disorder. I think when I was so stressed out about work and life and everything, I kept trying to communicate with her as if she was a normal person and more and more frequently being angry that she did the things she did. If I would have taken time to step back and really analyze situations more often, I could have communicated to her in a way that spoke to what she needed to hear. For her, perception is the truth, regardless of facts. For me, I'm a super logical thinker, where truth (MOST of the time) is based upon facts and not feelings. We clashed a lot in this area.
I truly believe with all my heart that God wants us to reconcile. But, if you watched that video, you know I'm up against a mountain and walls fortified to the sky of a stubborn woman's heart. She's literally vilified me for some made up reason in her head and has completely cut me off from her life. But God is Almighty and He is bigger than this. If anyone can move this mountain and break down these walls, He can. I will continue to love her through all this. I just wish she could see I went through all this for her and to be true to what I preach about marriage. To see how much I persevered for my love for her. She will be sad in the future if I end up with someone else. I can't imagine how much she will regret her actions. I will feel sorry for her.
I appreciate your replies and your support. I know my wife has mental illness and most likely has paranoid personality disorder. I think when I was so stressed out about work and life and everything, I kept trying to communicate with her as if she was a normal person and more and more frequently being angry that she did the things she did. If I would have taken time to step back and really analyze situations more often, I could have communicated to her in a way that spoke to what she needed to hear. For her, perception is the truth, regardless of facts. For me, I'm a super logical thinker, where truth (MOST of the time) is based upon facts and not feelings. We clashed a lot in this area.
I truly believe with all my heart that God wants us to reconcile. But, if you watched that video, you know I'm up against a mountain and walls fortified to the sky of a stubborn woman's heart. She's literally vilified me for some made up reason in her head and has completely cut me off from her life. But God is Almighty and He is bigger than this. If anyone can move this mountain and break down these walls, He can. I will continue to love her through all this. I just wish she could see I went through all this for her and to be true to what I preach about marriage. To see how much I persevered for my love for her. She will be sad in the future if I end up with someone else. I can't imagine how much she will regret her actions. I will feel sorry for her.
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I've been feeling a lot better for the most part recently.
I believe the Holy Spirit spoke to me the other day and it gave me a lot of hope about my situation.
I've been learning to play guitar and I've been writing a Christian song that I'm almost finished with and I believe it will help encourage a lot of people. I'll be happy to share it here when I'm done.
I've also restarted writing a Christian science fiction book I started a few years ago. It's a very original concept that will be the plot twist equivalent of watching The Matrix for the first time.
I also decided to start a Bible study / fellowship / prayer group on Sunday nights for lonely, depressed, grieving, and hurt people. It was something I felt I should do the whole time I was a crisis worker and now I finally feel ready to do it.
Trying to be productive for the Kingdom of God in whatever way I can.
I just want y'all to know I love you as my fellow Christians and I'm so grateful for all your prayers and support through the past few months that were probably the hardest in my life. You have no idea how important you and others have been in helping me stay alive and keep my sanity through all such unbelievable turmoil.
Everything my wife has done to hurt me, God has turned around for good. I still have a few more hurdles to clear, but I believe He will be with me to face those as well.
Again, I'm eternally grateful for the encouraging words and prayer y'all have offered for me. God bless you!
I believe the Holy Spirit spoke to me the other day and it gave me a lot of hope about my situation.
I've been learning to play guitar and I've been writing a Christian song that I'm almost finished with and I believe it will help encourage a lot of people. I'll be happy to share it here when I'm done.
I've also restarted writing a Christian science fiction book I started a few years ago. It's a very original concept that will be the plot twist equivalent of watching The Matrix for the first time.
I also decided to start a Bible study / fellowship / prayer group on Sunday nights for lonely, depressed, grieving, and hurt people. It was something I felt I should do the whole time I was a crisis worker and now I finally feel ready to do it.
Trying to be productive for the Kingdom of God in whatever way I can.
I just want y'all to know I love you as my fellow Christians and I'm so grateful for all your prayers and support through the past few months that were probably the hardest in my life. You have no idea how important you and others have been in helping me stay alive and keep my sanity through all such unbelievable turmoil.
Everything my wife has done to hurt me, God has turned around for good. I still have a few more hurdles to clear, but I believe He will be with me to face those as well.
Again, I'm eternally grateful for the encouraging words and prayer y'all have offered for me. God bless you!
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