What is a Gentleman?

[victoriangent1961]

Whatever we read in fiction, leads to unfulfilled fantasies.
I refer to myself as a gentleman. I do so because I am more interested in conversation with a lady instead of talking about myself unless part of the conversation but I give preference to the lady first. I pay for meals and do acts of service unless the lady desires to pay. I walk her to the car door or to the house door but do not demand to go inside. A gentleman is considerate of the lady first and sex is not a subject to be focused on but an interest in the lady as a whole person created in God's image.
But I do draw the line when being a gentleman is taken for granted instead of being appreciated. If not respected or being deceived by the lady, I will withdraw from spending time with them.

 

[Lanolin]

welll there is a whole genre in fiction called FANTASY although its commonly featuring dragons and such, but theres also a genre that is supposedly real life about 'ordinary' people albeit its more of a middle class ordinary 'I cant get a man' dilemma than anyone actually struggling to put food on the table kind of ordinary.

 

[Lanolin]

Though suppsedly thas why Cinderella stories are so compelling, heres someone whos been abused and dirt poor, yet this prince charming sweeps her off her feet and she loses her borrowed super expensive shoe.

 

[JustJames]

Can men in the forum answer this I want to know

What you think a 'gentleman' is?

Is it different to just being an ordinary man? If so, what qualities do you need to have. Is it necessary?

Short answer: me.
But in all seriousness one who dresses for the occasion and has social decorum.

 

[Lanolin]

Short answer: me.
But in all seriousness one who dresses for the occasion and has social decorum.

I fully expect you to wear a mask and be two metres apart when out shopping. No spitting or handshaking right.

 

[JustJames]

I fully expect you to wear a mask and be two metres apart when out shopping. No spitting or handshaking right.

Not that kind of gentleman. I love fresh air not my own CO2, spitting is for camels and llamas, and I only shake hands with other gentlemen.

 

[brighthouse98]

My view of a gentleman- A Man who is known not to have rash judgement,a Man who in the Lord has learned to think twice before speaking once,one who would rather be kind in both actions and speech then bold and indifferent.Learning and still learning as I am in the Lord it is not always what is said that is important, through words do matter,but rather what one does with what they say to me is most important.

But how one delivers any word spoken is to be done in love as if one is speaking to one self. The other problem can be in telling the truth. example Hi honey how do you like my new dress?? Do you like it sweetheart??? She said I love it!!! Then baby that is all that matters!! If you love it then I love it. LOLSee how you can afford an arguement?? lol

Instead of saying, Baby I would not wear that at a worm wrestle. lol The point is caring about another feeling as you do your own,but still being truthful!! In the Lord I look to always remember these scriptures. ( Eph 4:17-32) Before I speak or do anything. Fine question Lanolin! This is just my view on the subject.

 

[Lanolin]

Not that kind of gentleman. I love fresh air not my own CO2, spitting is for camels and llamas, and I only shake hands with other gentlemen.

would you just tell the lady to shop instead then

put her in the line of fire? or get goods delivered by servants? under covid restrictions. just wondering.

 

[Lanolin]

My view of a gentleman- A Man who is known not to have rash judgement,a Man who in the Lord has learned to think twice before speaking once,one who would rather be kind in both actions and speech then bold and indifferent.Learning and still learning as I am in the Lord it is not always what is said that is important, through words do matter,but rather what one does with what they say to me is most important.

But how one delivers any word spoken is to be done in love as if one is speaking to one self. The other problem can be in telling the truth. example Hi honey how do you like my new dress?? Do you like it sweetheart??? She said I love it!!! Then baby that is all that matters!! If you love it then I love it. LOLSee how you can afford an arguement?? lol

Instead of saying, Baby I would not wear that at a worm wrestle. lol The point is caring about another feeling as you do your own,but still being truthful!! In the Lord I look to always remember these scriptures. ( Eph 4:17-32) Before I speak or do anything. Fine question Lanolin! This is just my view on the subject.

if its a new dress she bought it because she likes it. why would she buy it (or make it) if she hated it or didnt like wearing it?!

the only ppl that dont like wearing new clothes are if its like a work uniform or something they forced to wear...like a bridesmaids dress!

come on men have some smarts about how you respond.....shes the one wearing it not you.

 

[Lanolin]

you could say. I have no clue about dresses.

even a sack would look good on you.

 

[1ofthem]

A gentleman is fancy....

He's fancy like Applebees on date night.
With the Bourbon steak and an oreo shake with some whipped cream on top too.
Two staws, one check and he's got that...Yeah, he's all that...lol

 

[17Bees]

A gentleman is fancy....

He's fancy like Applebees on date night.
With the Bourbon steak and an oreo shake with some whipped cream on top too.
Two staws, one check and he's got that...Yeah, he's all that...lol

Only occasionally can I find someone beautiful without seeing their picture. I believe God shows favor to the humble and to the oppressed. I believe your humility precedes you, @1ofthem. And when that brings blessings from Our Lord God, it brings beauty as well. "When the pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with the humble is wisdom". Proverbs 11:2

 

[1ofthem]

Only occasionally can I find someone beautiful without seeing their picture. I believe God shows favor to the humble and to the oppressed. I believe your humility precedes you, @1ofthem. And when that brings blessings from Our Lord God, it brings beauty as well. "When the pride comes, then comes disgrace, but with the humble is wisdom". Proverbs 11:2

^^^^^^^a perfect example of a true gentleman.


Thanks, that was very nice of you to say.

 

[Lynx]

A gentleman is fancy....

He's fancy like Applebees on date night.
With the Bourbon steak and an oreo shake with some whipped cream on top too.
Two staws, one check and he's got that...Yeah, he's all that...lol

*Lynx checks his wallet...

Well that puts me out. My wallet doesn't have the specs to play that song. In fact all my wallet will play is banjo picking. I need to find a girl who likes fried okra I guess.

 

[1ofthem]

No worries, Lynx...I'm sure there are many women out there just living for deep-fried okra...Try that one maybe it'll play for ya... lol

 

[Lynx]

I have heard that song. As a southern boy I like it better than the original living la vita loca.

 

[JustJames]

Living la vida okra!

 

[Lynx]

A gentleman is fancy....

He's fancy like Applebees on date night.
With the Bourbon steak and an oreo shake with some whipped cream on top too.
Two staws, one check and he's got that...Yeah, he's all that...lol

Oh yeah, I forgot to say something I intended to say...

That commercial plays on my grandmother's game show channel. Every time I see it I think, if I wanted a FANCY date night I'm pretty sure I could do something better than a chain restaurant like Applebee's. I mean... even at the same price level I can think of better places. And if I really wanted to do fancy I'm certain I could put up more for a much better place.

 

[1ofthem]

Oh yeah, I forgot to say something I intended to say...

That commercial plays on my grandmother's game show channel. Every time I see it I think, if I wanted a FANCY date night I'm pretty sure I could do something better than a chain restaurant like Applebee's. I mean... even at the same price level I can think of better places. And if I really wanted to do fancy I'm certain I could put up more for a much better place.

The song isn't just a commercial. It's a country music song and a TikTock challenge... neither of which is probably appropriate to post on Christian Chat.

The song is simply saying that you don't need to be rich to impress most women. The first part is about how they are just as happy at Wendy's, but he tries to give his lady a little upgrade when he gets paid....lol

Anyways, being from the part of the south that I am...Yeah, we women find Applebee's fancy...we don't need a Tesla to impress us we're just as fine rolling on a Vespa...Don't need a mansion for romancing....we're super fine with double-wide slow dancing.

While I don't really like the song...I heard it in the store while I was shopping and it is one of those catchy little ditties.
But it's actually true in ways. Like there are a few that would say a gentleman dresses the part, speaks the part, maybe fancy, etc.

To me, a gentleman can be that down-to-earth guy with the faded jeans and workboats who nods and holds the door for you.
Although it may be nice every now and then...He really doesn't have to be fancy like Applebee's all the time....lol

 

[Lanolin]

ok the latest novel I read has 3 men in it, as it centres around 3 couples

one guy married to a former dancer who is very wealthy, is his second wife and they like partying, has many children
an incompatible couple of one guy who is kinda tone deaf married to a cellist, they have 2 daughters
and a childless couple but the guy wants children and they have been doing IVF.

The guy that is childless saves the life of one of the daughters of the incompatible couple who nearly drowns in the rich guys fountain..at his party he is hosting. the childless guy gives her CPR along with his wife. They had asked the cellist to donate her eggs but she really doesnt want to but pretends to them she does...

In the end (spoiler) the childless guy decides he doesnt want to cellists charity since it is making her friendship with his wife uncomfortable (and showing up the tone deaf guy husband for maybe neglecting his daughters) so they decide to foster-adopt instead.

Which guy is the gentleman?