Dad jokes

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Lanolin

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
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Something Ive always wondered...why are there so many dad jokes but no mum jokes.
I worked in a bookstore and half the humour shelves were taken up with dad jokes but never any mum jokes.

I cant tell you any off the top of my head though.
Im sure there must be some funny mothers..?!
 
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My dad doesn't really tell ha-ha jokes. When I laugh about something my dad says, it is usually out of disbelief. He has a high IQ and has some interesting interpretations/views on a wide range of topics.
 
I dated a girl once who was cross-eyed. It didn't work out. We never really saw eye to eye and I had my suspicions she was seeing someone on the side.
 
MsMediator said:
My dad doesn't really tell ha-ha jokes. When I laugh about something my dad says, it is usually out of disbelief. He has a high IQ and has some interesting interpretations/views on a wide range of topics.
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I love memories like that.
My daughter's memories of my late husband were of his history lessons. He would take the place of the main character. He was Christopher Columbus, George Washington, Pocahontas and John Rolf, even Mrs. O'Leary's cow in the great Chicago fire. So many great stories and memories. Despite his lessons, all three daughters passed their history classes.
 
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Cameron143 said:
I dated a girl once who was cross-eyed. It didn't work out. We never really saw eye to eye and I had my suspicions she was seeing someone on the side.
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That's sooo wrong but soooo very funny. Got this old man to lol. thanks
 
shittim said:
Which is a dinosaurs least favorite reindeer? Comet!
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Here's an interesting factoid. All of Santa's reindeers were actually female.

Only female reindeer have antlers in the winter months. While the male reindeer have their antlers in spring and summer in time for the rut.



Which days are the strongest? Saturday and Sunday. The rest are weekdays. I just found out I’m colorblind. The news came out of the purple!

What do you call a beehive without an exit? Unbelievable.
 
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The only time I get jokes is at Christmas when I have a box of christmas crackers. But they are all christmas jokes about santa and snow.

There should be on Fathers day Fathers day crackers, with dad jokes inside.
 
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I stood in the garden early yesterday wondering where the sun had gone.
Then it dawned on me.

I used to make a lot of money clearing leaves from gardens,
I was raking it in.

What do you call a homeless snail?
A slug.

Why did the tomato blush?
Because he saw the salad dressing.

What is a zucchini's favorite sport?
Squash
 
When we go somewhere and drive back late at night, as the dad, I'm almost always the one driving. As they settle in to sleep in the car, I'll say, "Wake me up when we get there."
 
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er...I rememer as a child terrified of getting into car with my dad. I was always made to sit in the middle, being the middle child. The middle car seat had only a lap seat belt that wouldnt protect you in a crash and you'd go flying out through the windscreen if you did.

At least if you driving you are holding on to the wheel...
 
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