Would you date or marry a separated or divorced person?

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,179
113
These were Samaritans, so a bit different religion that relied on a version of the first six books of the Bible. But even so the MEN probably divorced HER. They were using a very similar law of Moses with three different verses about the location of the temple/tabernacle and a few other textual variants here and there.
you dont know that for sure dont assume
also, a woman could be divorced if a man abandoned her.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,179
113
Or they don't get the butterflies in their stomach...

Or they get bored...

Or they find someone else who excites them...

Or they want to be independent and live life on their own.

The stereotype of the husband who runs off with his secretary isn't the majority of cases. There are plenty of flighty unfaithful wives out there, too, just as there are unfaithful husbands. Sexual immorality is not required for one to be unfaithful towards ones family and ones commitments.

Malachi 2:16 warns against men divorcing their wives, "therefore take heed to your spirit, that ye deal not treacherously ". But Jeremiah 3:20 also mentions treacherous wives,
Surely, as a wife treacherously departs from her husband, So have you dealt treacherously with Me, O house of Israel,” says the LORD.
(NKJV)
I never mentioned any stereotype

I dont know about 'butterflies in stomach' which is a stupid reason to leave someone, but I have known some divorceees who married without undertanding what marriage meant - hello you have to look after your husband and wait around till he gets home if you dont have a job or children to look after. Some husbands who are very proud wont allow their wives to work or have any money of their own.

Which is a bit unreasonable. Then dont care about their need for new clothes like they have to continue wearing whatver they took with them into the marriage. The other thing is not providing them with any food or ingredients to cook with and then expect a hot meal every day.
 

presidente

Senior Member
May 29, 2013
9,093
1,756
113
you dont know that for sure dont assume
also, a woman could be divorced if a man abandoned her.

About the first part, if they like the actual Jews followed the Torah on this, the men had to give out the certificates. And the Torah tells a man not to sell a slave he took as a concubine wife, but the Jews wouldn't have considered him sending her away a legal divorce unless he gave out the certificate. I do not see any reason to think that the Samaritans were different. There weren't that many textual variants between their books and the Jews books.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,179
113
About the first part, if they like the actual Jews followed the Torah on this, the men had to give out the certificates. And the Torah tells a man not to sell a slave he took as a concubine wife, but the Jews wouldn't have considered him sending her away a legal divorce unless he gave out the certificate. I do not see any reason to think that the Samaritans were different. There weren't that many textual variants between their books and the Jews books.
Samaritans were quite different and Jews hated them for being different.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,179
113
Solomon's wisdom came from God. That's why he stood out singularly from everyone else.
His mother gave him lots of advice, that came from God. However she never took any credit
 

Cameron143

Well-known member
Mar 1, 2022
16,025
5,643
113
62
His mother gave him lots of advice, that came from God. However she never took any credit
Do you have scriptural evidence, or is this something you believe?
I'm simply trying to point out the difference between wisdom that is garnered through our senses and experience, and that which is given directly from God. For example, there are many people who are good teachers. They are naturally gifted to fill this profession. But the teachers God gives to shepherd His people are endowed with a supernatural gift of teaching from God Himself, that is over and above what one receives naturally. This is the case with the wisdom that Solomon experienced.
 

Adstar

Senior Member
Jul 24, 2016
7,481
3,523
113
A seperated person is still married to their former husband/ wife.. So i would not marry a seperated person..

A divorced person ( as long as their divorce was justified by the Word of God ) i would marry..

Of course they would have the right stuff to qualify to get a proposal from me.. :cool:
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,179
113
Do you have scriptural evidence, or is this something you believe?
I'm simply trying to point out the difference between wisdom that is garnered through our senses and experience, and that which is given directly from God. For example, there are many people who are good teachers. They are naturally gifted to fill this profession. But the teachers God gives to shepherd His people are endowed with a supernatural gift of teaching from God Himself, that is over and above what one receives naturally. This is the case with the wisdom that Solomon experienced.
Have you never read Proverbs chapters 2, 3 and 4 where wisdom is personified as a woman.

Why would it come from David, he gave instruction, which Solomon did not always follow.
Isn't Bathesheba the Proverbs 31 woman. Who else could it be.

She wasn't a teacher. She was a MOTHER. Are you saying your mother isn't wise?
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,179
113
I finished reading a Kings Story it was a memoir by former King Edward who married divorcee Wallis Simpson. What a drama he had, to give up the throne to marry her.

Otherwise he would have had a 'morganitic' marriage which I have never heard of but apparently they were unequal because she was a commoner, an American, and divorced (actually twice divorced!) and he was the King of England. So if they were to marry, she was not allowed to be Queen and any children would not inherit any titles.

Talk about unequally yoked! Not spiritually but in terms of titles and class, although she was no pauper. The parliament and prime minister did everything to stop the marriage but the King decided otherwise. Even when Mrs Simpson decided to run away to France and not carry on the relationship - she tried to stop the abdication but it was too late, he already made up his mind. At the time she was nearly divorced but he made up his mind to marry her anyway.

They had no children, she never had any children from the first two marriages, one to navy man, the other was an alcoholic (not sure what he did), when she married she was stuck to him for the rest of her life, he loved her but it can't be said she loved him as much as he did her. Which was kind of sad. They were exiled to France and the Bahamas and his brother succeeded to the throne.

In his memoirs he never mentions what pressure or burden he placed on his brother and just assumed he would do it because he was already a family man with two daughters (one of whom was Princess Elizabeth). At the time of King Edwards short reign he was unmarried but he never made the coronation.

Not sure what to think about this. Mrs Simpson or Wallis as she was known was ostracised by the Royal family and became known as 'that woman'

This happened in the last century. King Edward was meant to be the head of the Church of England! Ironic.
 

Cameron143

Well-known member
Mar 1, 2022
16,025
5,643
113
62
Have you never read Proverbs chapters 2, 3 and 4 where wisdom is personified as a woman.

Why would it come from David, he gave instruction, which Solomon did not always follow.
Isn't Bathesheba the Proverbs 31 woman. Who else could it be.

She wasn't a teacher. She was a MOTHER. Are you saying your mother isn't wise?
My mother possesses a worldly wisdom, garnered from teaching and experience. Solomon possessed a wisdom the source of which is God. My mom's wisdom can save me from an earthly peril. Solomon's wisdom can save my soul.
The source of wisdom makes the difference.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,179
113
My mother possesses a worldly wisdom, garnered from teaching and experience. Solomon possessed a wisdom the source of which is God. My mom's wisdom can save me from an earthly peril. Solomon's wisdom can save my soul.
The source of wisdom makes the difference.
it wasnt solomons wisdom though he got it from someone as many of the proverbs keep saying 'my son' so it may have been from either his mum or his dad

Rememeber Solomon asked God for wisdom above all else.
Solomon wasnt giving advice to his own son, the proverbs are what he received. Someone had to tell him the proverbs. Unlike Samuel, Solomon wasnt hearing directly from God. So conclusion was that God used his mother Bathesheba to advise him. It could have been his dad David but we know enough about David that he wasnt always the sharpest knife in the drawer.
 

Mosie

Active member
May 30, 2022
120
54
28
Would you date or marry someone who had been divorced? If so, under what conditions?

Would you date someone who was separated from their spouse? If so, under what conditions?

Some scripture for discussion and consideration.

Mark 10:11-12
11 And he said unto them, Whosoever shall put away his wife, and marry another, commits adultery against her.
12 And if a woman shall put away her husband, and be married to another, she commits adultery.
(KJ2000B)

Matthew 19:9
And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, commits adultery: and whoever marries her who is put away does commit adultery.
(KJ2000B)

I Corinthians 7
10 And unto the married I command, yet not I, but the Lord, Let not the wife depart from her husband:
11 But if she depart, let her remain unmarried, or be reconciled to her husband: and let not the husband put away his wife.
(KJ2000B)

Romans 7
7 Or do you not know, brethren (for I speak to those who know the law), that the law [a]has dominion over a man as long as he lives? 2 For the woman who has a husband is bound by the law to her husband as long as he lives. But if the husband dies, she is released from the law of her husband. 3 So then if, while her husband lives, she marries another man, she will be called an adulteress; but if her husband dies, she is free from that law, so that she is no adulteress, though she has married another man.
(NKJV)
...............
Not Separated no way, they are still married.

Divorced, maybe ....be careful though. You must date and get to know them at least a year or two....and date based on godly principles.

***If you are against divorce, what about if the marriage was abusive? Would you advise the person to stay? Divorce is like any other sin and can be forgiven.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,179
113
King Edward it seems didnt listen to his mother....he had parliamentary advisors.
He also received a rather nasty letter from the Archbishop at the time, basically telling him that it would be impossible for him to marry Wallis and keep the throne.

But he was in love and threw caution to the wind. Ive read both sides and it just seems a bit messy. Wallis became the most hated woman in america by the brits because it was seen as she was trying to become Queen, but in the US I dont think too many people cared, marrying 'up' was what independent socialite women did for a living.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,179
113
Princess Grace or Grace Kelly married into royalty but found it very hard to adjust to royal life. I think most non royals who marry into a royal family would find that wealth and lifestyle completely overwhelming.

she was not a divorcee though, however, I have heard that at the time, it was very importnat that she was a virgin, however, she was a Hollywood star and had had several lovers before she married, but people wanted to believe a complete fantasy that she was a pure white bride and never been touched before. I dont think so!
 

Cameron143

Well-known member
Mar 1, 2022
16,025
5,643
113
62
it wasnt solomons wisdom though he got it from someone as many of the proverbs keep saying 'my son' so it may have been from either his mum or his dad

Rememeber Solomon asked God for wisdom above all else.
Solomon wasnt giving advice to his own son, the proverbs are what he received. Someone had to tell him the proverbs. Unlike Samuel, Solomon wasnt hearing directly from God. So conclusion was that God used his mother Bathesheba to advise him. It could have been his dad David but we know enough about David that he wasnt always the sharpest knife in the drawer.

Why can't you accept that God is the Father who provided the wisdom? And that there is a wisdom of man, and a wisdom of God?
Solomon's words are scripture...God breathed...out of God's mouth. Can his mother or father say the same of their words? So what is written couldn't have come from them.