I know this is just another does God exist thread... So I apologize...
I just can't seem to accept the fact that I am not the most powerful being that exists... I have gone through moments that can only be explained as God... I have seen things that many say that 'it is from God'. Some days I have no doubt in my mind that there is a God and I love Him, cherish Him, and willing to serve Him.
But most days I laugh... It's almost like if there is a God he is holding my place of honor... I want/believe I can be greater or more... It feels like I am trapped (If that makes sense...).
When I think God exists a part of me says he doesn't. When I say He does not exist a part of me says He does. It's like I am stuck in the middle... Why can't there be a (curse word) clear sign either way!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Why do I love to read of Jesus but can not seem to convince myself that He died for our sins... I want to believe so badly... But the more the world sees me the less I see God.
I came across a quote recently it says. "Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.' We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people will not feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It is not just in some of us; it is in everyone and as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give others permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others." ~ Marianne Williamson
It is almost like I am more scared of the existence of God then anything imaginable!
I guess what my real question is how do you truly accept God... I have tried every way it seems... And no matter what at some point I seem to slip away from those thoughts... I'm getting fed up with this ping ponging between He exists and He doesn't exist...
I just can't seem to accept the fact that I am not the most powerful being that exists... I have gone through moments that can only be explained as God... I have seen things that many say that 'it is from God'. Some days I have no doubt in my mind that there is a God and I love Him, cherish Him, and willing to serve Him.
But most days I laugh... It's almost like if there is a God he is holding my place of honor... I want/believe I can be greater or more... It feels like I am trapped (If that makes sense...).
When I think God exists a part of me says he doesn't. When I say He does not exist a part of me says He does. It's like I am stuck in the middle... Why can't there be a (curse word) clear sign either way!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Why do I love to read of Jesus but can not seem to convince myself that He died for our sins... I want to believe so badly... But the more the world sees me the less I see God.
I came across a quote recently it says. "Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.' We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people will not feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It is not just in some of us; it is in everyone and as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give others permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others." ~ Marianne Williamson
It is almost like I am more scared of the existence of God then anything imaginable!
I guess what my real question is how do you truly accept God... I have tried every way it seems... And no matter what at some point I seem to slip away from those thoughts... I'm getting fed up with this ping ponging between He exists and He doesn't exist...
