Funny stories in the Bible

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.

posthuman

Senior Member
Jul 31, 2013
37,693
13,513
113
Its kind of like a dutch auction. Or haggling. The way he bargains it down to ten. But there werent even ten righteous living there.

And Abraham doesnt come right out and say to God, hey can you just please save my nephew lot. Which is what many people would do right? How many of us pray numerically for people to be saved. LOrd can you save 50 people. Or failing that, 40 people. No? How about 30.
My guess is there were exactly 10 ppl in Lots family in Sodom

So guess what Lots wife turned back for?
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
My guess is there were exactly 10 ppl in Lots family in Sodom

So guess what Lots wife turned back for?
...did he have some of other daughters that were married cos he had sons in law. Or were they actually gay husbands of his two daughters that hadnt known a man. I dont quite understand that part, why he mocked them, the sons in law didnt go with him or their wives together. Or were they engaged to be married?
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
Then those daughters who Lot said didnt know a man got him drunk and both slept with him.

Um. Ok its not funny, but its kinda weird....Lot was declaring their chasitity at the same time as giving them away and then they go and kind of rape their father. ?! And they dont really seem bothered that their mum got killed.

I presume the sons in laws perished.

Wonder if Lot ever found out that he was the father. He must have known...? How could you not know you fathered a child, is getting drunk really an excuse. Does wine somehow make you want to procreate with your daughters...?
 

posthuman

Senior Member
Jul 31, 2013
37,693
13,513
113
...did he have some of other daughters that were married cos he had sons in law. Or were they actually gay husbands of his two daughters that hadnt known a man. I dont quite understand that part, why he mocked them, the sons in law didnt go with him or their wives together. Or were they engaged to be married?
Lot, his wife, the two daughters that went with him = 4

In genesis 19:12 the angels ask him about "sons, sons-in-law or daughters" and he speaks to his sons in law, but not to a son. Sons in law is plural so at least two sons in law, and two corresponding other daughters besides the ones who are at his home - verse 15 the angels say to take the "daughters who are here" indicating they aren't his only daughters.

That makes 8, Lot, his wife, two virgin daughters, two married daughters and their two husbands.

Verse 12 the angels said "sons" plural. The language here specifies sons in law as different than sons, and if we make the presumption that the angels are not ignorant about Lot - which really ought to be the presumption, because when has one of God's angels sent to do God's will been ignorant of His will? These angels know everything about what they are there to do according to the text - so taking that to indicate he has at least two sons, who he does not go speak to, that brings his family total in Sodom & /or Gomorrah to 10

Lot
Lot's wife
2 unmarried daughters
2 married daughters
2 sons in law
2 unmarried sons

Reading the whole context of the account Lot is contradictory to the angels at every single step of the way. He argues with them about where they want to stay when they arrive, he doesn't go warn all his family, he hesitates and has to be forcibly dragged out of the city, he refuses to go to the mountains and wants to go to one of the smaller towns that they were going to destroy.

To me that's a kind of tragic humor though this whole thing - this seemingly completely oblivious and obstinate man Lot, backtalking and dragging his feet while angels are sent by God to rescue him, us later called righteous in 2 Peter 2:27! Because of how he acted? Nope! Because he was vexed by the evil around him ((per Peter)) - not vexed enough to get out of there, tho!
That tells me something about righteousness that's ironically different from how we, who look at the outside, usually think about it :)
 

posthuman

Senior Member
Jul 31, 2013
37,693
13,513
113
Then those daughters who Lot said didnt know a man got him drunk and both slept with him.

Um. Ok its not funny, but its kinda weird....Lot was declaring their chasitity at the same time as giving them away and then they go and kind of rape their father. ?! And they dont really seem bothered that their mum got killed.

I presume the sons in laws perished.

Wonder if Lot ever found out that he was the father. He must have known...? How could you not know you fathered a child, is getting drunk really an excuse. Does wine somehow make you want to procreate with your daughters...?
The daughters say there is no man they could marry - where do they get that idea?
How do they wind up living in a cave when Lots plan was to go to Zoar? Where'd he get wine in a cave?

Lot didn't 'want' this - - his daughters essentially raped him.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
Yea I dont know why Lot was kind of arguing with the angels who were going to get him out.

And the Bible doesnt say whether he was reunited with Abrahams clan or not, maybe their descendants were further down. The Moabites.

As for lots wife, I dont know about the lippy. Because the daughters did not turn back so it wasnt really a woman thing. I imagine she just turned around to look but not left them and went running back. Maybe she was just rubbernecking. I know there are people that slow down to gawk at car crashes, or even when warned about tsunamis, go to the shore to gaze, and tornado chasers. God sent down fire and brimstone and she just wanted to watch the destruction???!

How about the news media in our day. When 9/11 happened, did people go theres a plane crash into the world trade centre, lets go have a look. And it was on the tv and everyone was glued to it. I couldnt bear to watch thousands of people die.
 

exegete

Active member
Dec 23, 2018
261
219
43
57
My Tiny Apartment
2 Kings 4:38-41: there was a meeting of prophets where they were eating stew and they all cried out that there was "death in the pot". Elisha had them put flour in it; it was fine and no one died! Was this some expert culinary skill? An old family recipe? Does this even count as a miracle?

Honestly, this account always gets a chuckle out of me.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
The daughters say there is no man they could marry - where do they get that idea?
How do they wind up living in a cave when Lots plan was to go to Zoar? Where'd he get wine in a cave?

Lot didn't 'want' this - - his daughters essentially raped him.
Lots daughters were secret alcoholics and snuck some wine out as they were fleeing Sodom.
 

posthuman

Senior Member
Jul 31, 2013
37,693
13,513
113
As for lots wife, I dont know about the lippy. Because the daughters did not turn back so it wasnt really a woman thing.
That's a good point.

If I'm right about her having born six children and only two of them being with her, i have a different notion of why she may have lingered.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
That's a good point.

If I'm right about her having born six children and only two of them being with her, i have a different notion of why she may have lingered.
True..Jesus said dont be like Lots wife and look back, and he did talk about leaving family behind.
The destruction seemed to come without much warning I dont know if God had sent any messengers before hand to to tell the whole town they were doomed and to repent like he did with Ninevah. He only let Abraham know and it seemes He hesitated about telling Abraham as well.

I suppose if God hadnt told Abraham, abraham might have eventually heard Sodom was destroyed and got angry with God?
 

posthuman

Senior Member
Jul 31, 2013
37,693
13,513
113
True..Jesus said dont be like Lots wife and look back, and he did talk about leaving family behind.
well what He actually said was remember her.

see if you can find anywhere in the Bible that either a pillar or salt is spoken of as being a sign if evil...?

fact is, God prevented her from returning to the city, and preserved her.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
Its a memorial, I dont remember it ever said the pillar of salt was evil where did you get that from?
 

posthuman

Senior Member
Jul 31, 2013
37,693
13,513
113
Its a memorial, I dont remember it ever said the pillar of salt was evil where did you get that from?
From everyone who always says we're supposed to remember Lot's wife as a symbol of evil - - not necc. you ;)
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
From everyone who always says we're supposed to remember Lot's wife as a symbol of evil - - not necc. you ;)
Thats new to me.
Maybe they just mean sodom and gomorrahs destruction in general.
 

posthuman

Senior Member
Jul 31, 2013
37,693
13,513
113
Thats new to me.
Maybe they just mean sodom and gomorrahs destruction in general.
have a listen to some random sermons on 'remember Lot's wife' -- if you find one that doesn't put her in a very bad light, i'd love to hear it :)
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
have a listen to some random sermons on 'remember Lot's wife' -- if you find one that doesn't put her in a very bad light, i'd love to hear it :)
Jesus gave a mini-sermon on Lots wife in Luke 17:30-33. He did not mention she was a symbol of evil, just that the day the son of Man is revealed, the destruction will all be sudden and there wont be any time to go back for anything. Dont look back. Whoever tries to keep his life will lose it and whoever loses his life will preserve it.

It was a warning to followers not to be doubleminded and be destroyed. Interestingly this will all happen in ONE DAY.
 

Lanolin

Well-known member
Dec 15, 2018
23,460
7,188
113
I come back to this thread...
I find it funny that a woman washed Jesus feet with tears and dried them with her hair. I cant imagine how she did this, she must have had really long hair, or maybe I'm reading it wrong.

I've never seen anyone do this, or cry buckets enough to wash someones feet with their tears?? Or was she crying as she washed Jesus feet.
 

1ofthem

Senior Member
Mar 30, 2016
3,729
1,921
113
I'm sure she probably had long hair. My hair is almost to my waist I have some family members whose hair is much longer than mine. I know Paul discouraged women from cutting their hair back then so I'm sure most women in Jesus day had really long hair. Don't know for sure if she filled a bowl with her tears and washed his feet of if her tears just mixed with the ointment that she bought as she was washing his feet.

But the moral of this story is clear. This was a very special occasion it showed her respect and love for Jesus. She was grateful for his love and mercy.

Jesus said:
He said to him, "You have judged correctly." Turning to the woman, he said to Simon, "Do you see this woman? I entered into your house, and you gave me no water for my feet, but she has wet my feet with her tears, and wiped them with the hair of her head. You gave me no kiss, but she, since the time I came in, has not ceased to kiss my feet. You didn't anoint my head with oil, but she has anointed my feet with ointment. Therefore I tell you, her sins, which are many, are forgiven, for she loved much. But to whom little is forgiven, the same loves little." He said to her, "Your sins are forgiven."

— Luke 7:40-47, World English Bible