Can husband still cancel his wife's promise to God?

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Dec 6, 2019
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#41
This pertains to the old testament Mitzvah, laws of God, and do not stand for the Christian today. A woman is not property of her husband. They are united as one. Not one greater than the other.
I think New Testament emphasizes different roles for wives and husbands especially much.. sure you find this in Old Testament too but the theological side of this is described maybe even more in New Testament... For example

"Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything." (Efesians 5.)

And of course the husbands must love their wives... But I think The New Covenant doesn't cancel this order. ? (With a good husband and maybe also in a little more difficult situation I think this is a good system for wives... They don't need to bear same kind of responsibility of everything as husbands..)
 

Whispered

Well-known member
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#42
I think New Testament emphasizes different roles for wives and husbands especially much.. sure you find this in Old Testament too but the theological side of this is described maybe even more in New Testament... For example

"Wives, submit yourselves to your own husbands as you do to the Lord. 23 For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. 24 Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything." (Efesians 5.)

And of course the husbands must love their wives... But I think The New Covenant doesn't cancel this order. ? (With a good husband and maybe also in a little more difficult situation I think this is a good system for wives... They don't need to bear same kind of responsibility of everything as husbands..)
I consider Paul's instruction in Ephesians to be his personal opinion of the matter. Whereas God said:
The Book of Genesis 2:24 Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh.
 
Sep 15, 2019
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#43
Or then you are thinking same way as is in Moses' law in the place that I quoted earlier, "Her husband may confirm or nullify any vow she makes or any sworn pledge to deny herself"? ...
I think an extreme example would be if you promised someone a visit to the Whitehouse. But you don't really have any jurisdiction to allow the promise you gave. So it would really be up to President Trump to either allow you to keep your promise, or to say 'No, sorry, the one who made this promise was a little crazy and acting beyond her jurisdiction'. I think the husband's role over the wife is the same, as women can sometimes be quite emotional and not act rationally, hence the explicit veto provision given by God in the Old Testament (in case some husbands felt obliged to honour the promises of their wives).
 
Dec 6, 2019
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#44
I think an extreme example would be if you promised someone a visit to the Whitehouse. But you don't really have any jurisdiction to allow the promise you gave. So it would really be up to President Trump to either allow you to keep your promise, or to say 'No, sorry, the one who made this promise was a little crazy and acting beyond her jurisdiction'. I think the husband's role over the wife is the same, as women can sometimes be quite emotional and not act rationally, hence the explicit veto provision given by God in the Old Testament (in case some husbands felt obliged to honour the promises of their wives).
I think this is a very mercyful place in Moses' law...
 

TheLearner

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Jan 14, 2019
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#45
Ephesians 5:21 Easy-to-Read Version (ERV)
Wives and Husbands
21 Be willing to serve each other out of respect for Christ.
 

presidente

Senior Member
May 29, 2013
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#46
I think they can. Men could do that in the Old Testament because it was explicitly commanded. But I think it was also because the husband, as the head of the wife, had control over family assets. She was vowing assets he had control over. Spiritually, the husband is still the head of the wife even if secular law changes about property ownership. She is also to submit to him, and her vow may lead her into areas where she may not submit to him. The man in the passage has to consent sent to a vow, or at least do so implicitly by not rejecting the vow the same day he hears of it.

I read a post from a man once who said when he married, he asked his wife if she had made any vows to the Lord, and cancelled them all. That seems like a wise thing to do.

Jesus said, "Swear not at all" and James repeated this teaching. If the wife doesn't take this to heart, and the husband does, he can prevent a lot of trouble.
 
Dec 6, 2019
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#47
This is an interesting place too. Are there different rules to jewish christians? (Acts 21:20-26)

"When they heard this, they praised God. Then they said to Paul: “You see, brother, how many thousands of Jews have believed, and all of them are zealous for the law. 21 They have been informed that you teach all the Jews who live among the Gentiles to turn away from Moses, telling them not to circumcise their children or live according to our customs. 22 What shall we do? They will certainly hear that you have come, 23 so do what we tell you. There are four men with us who have made a vow. 24 Take these men, join in their purification rites and pay their expenses, so that they can have their heads shaved. Then everyone will know there is no truth in these reports about you, but that you yourself are living in obedience to the law. 25 As for the Gentile believers, we have written to them our decision that they should abstain from food sacrificed to idols, from blood, from the meat of strangled animals and from sexual immorality.”

26 The next day Paul took the men and purified himself along with them. Then he went to the temple to give notice of the date when the days of purification would end and the offering would be made for each of them."

Christian jews had made promises and Paul doesn't rebuke them for that but goes with them.
 
Dec 6, 2019
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#48
Obviously these Christian jews even obeyed Mose's law until some point, and Paul doesn't say anything to that either but tries to look like he does the same. If I understand this right...
 

presidente

Senior Member
May 29, 2013
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#49
Obviously these Christian jews even obeyed Mose's law until some point, and Paul doesn't say anything to that either but tries to look like he does the same. If I understand this right...
Or did the same, and did not tell the Jewish believers not to circumcise their children, etc. There isn't a passage that shows Paul eating a ham and cheese sandwich. Those issues are not addressed.
 
Dec 6, 2019
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#50
One new point of view: if a wife has promised God to give money to all beggars who ask money from her, but she doesn't have much money with her because she has a little baby and cannot go to work at the moment. So after she has used all her little money she must ask money from her husband. In this case is this Moses law place for her situation? I mean, if her husband has Rolf her not to give money even though she has made a promise to God. Because her own money using is also away from her husband. That would sound logical to me.
 
Dec 6, 2019
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#51
And please let's just keep concentrated on this issue and not on writers here thanx 😊
 

oyster67

Senior Member
May 24, 2014
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#52
One new point of view: if a wife has promised God to give money to all beggars who ask money from her, but she doesn't have much money with her because she has a little baby and cannot go to work at the moment. So after she has used all her little money she must ask money from her husband. In this case is this Moses law place for her situation? I mean, if her husband has Rolf her not to give money even though she has made a promise to God. Because her own money using is also away from her husband. That would sound logical to me.
God looks upon the heart.

Luke
21:1 And he looked up, and saw the rich men casting their gifts into the treasury.
21:2 And he saw also a certain poor widow casting in thither two mites.
21:3 And he said, Of a truth I say unto you, that this poor widow hath cast in more than they all:
21:4 For all these have of their abundance cast in unto the offerings of God: but she of her penury hath cast in all the living that she had.
 

oyster67

Senior Member
May 24, 2014
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#53
Obviously these Christian jews even obeyed Mose's law until some point, and Paul doesn't say anything to that either but tries to look like he does the same. If I understand this right...
Yes you do. Paul did some odd things himself, even after he fell off his horse.:confused:

Or did the same, and did not tell the Jewish believers not to circumcise their children, etc. There isn't a passage that shows Paul eating a ham and cheese sandwich. Those issues are not addressed.
The early church was nearly all "Jewish Believers". The New Way was for them just like it is for you and I. Ham and cheese sandwiches may well have been a subject of much disputation and indigestion:

Galatians
2:11 But when Peter was come to Antioch, I withstood him to the face, because he was to be blamed.
2:12 For before that certain came from James, he did eat with the Gentiles: but when they were come, he withdrew and separated himself, fearing them which were of the circumcision.
2:13 And the other Jews dissembled likewise with him; insomuch that Barnabas also was carried away with their dissimulation.
2:14 But when I saw that they walked not uprightly according to the truth of the gospel, I said unto Peter before [them] all, If thou, being a Jew, livest after the manner of Gentiles, and not as do the Jews, why compellest thou the Gentiles to live as do the Jews?
2:15 We [who are] Jews by nature, and not sinners of the Gentiles,
2:16 Knowing that a man is not justified by the works of the law, but by the faith of Jesus Christ, even we have believed in Jesus Christ, that we might be justified by the faith of Christ, and not by the works of the law: for by the works of the law shall no flesh be justified.
2:17 But if, while we seek to be justified by Christ, we ourselves also are found sinners, [is] therefore Christ the minister of sin? God forbid.
2:18 For if I build again the things which I destroyed, I make myself a transgressor.
2:19 For I through the law am dead to the law, that I might live unto God.
2:20 I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me.
2:21 I do not frustrate the grace of God: for if righteousness [come] by the law, then Christ is dead in vain.
 
Sep 15, 2019
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#54
This is an interesting place too. Are there different rules to jewish christians? (Acts 21:20-26)

"When they heard this, they praised God. Then they said to Paul: “You see, brother, how many thousands of Jews have believed, and all of them are zealous for the law. 21 They have been informed that you teach all the Jews who live among the Gentiles to turn away from Moses, telling them not to circumcise their children or live according to our customs. 22 What shall we do? They will certainly hear that you have come, 23 so do what we tell you. There are four men with us who have made a vow. 24 Take these men, join in their purification rites and pay their expenses, so that they can have their heads shaved. Then everyone will know there is no truth in these reports about you, but that you yourself are living in obedience to the law. 25 As for the Gentile believers, we have written to them our decision that they should abstain from food sacrificed to idols, from blood, from the meat of strangled animals and from sexual immorality.”

26 The next day Paul took the men and purified himself along with them. Then he went to the temple to give notice of the date when the days of purification would end and the offering would be made for each of them."

Christian jews had made promises and Paul doesn't rebuke them for that but goes with them.
Paul circumcised Timothy in Acts 16:3, so I'm not sure that Paul would have been teaching Jews to turn away from Moses. I don't think he had anything against Jews keeping Jewish customs, and as you point out, practiced some customs himself. But he was also careful to point out that Jewish customs don't save anyone - especially gentiles.
 
Dec 6, 2019
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#55
God looks upon the heart.

Luke
21:1 And he looked up, and saw the rich men casting their gifts into the treasury.
21:2 And he saw also a certain poor widow casting in thither two mites.
21:3 And he said, Of a truth I say unto you, that this poor widow hath cast in more than they all:
21:4 For all these have of their abundance cast in unto the offerings of God: but she of her penury hath cast in all the living that she had.
I think with a husband this is a little different.. for example I
if I cannot buy diapers and milk for our baby then my husband has to do that, so what I do with my money is also away from his money. Well, I don't know this for sure but how would you like your wife to do in this kind of situation? ....
 

oyster67

Senior Member
May 24, 2014
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#56
I think with a husband this is a little different.. for example I
if I cannot buy diapers and milk for our baby then my husband has to do that, so what I do with my money is also away from his money. Well, I don't know this for sure but how would you like your wife to do in this kind of situation? ....
Matthew
25:34 Then shall the King say unto them on his right hand, Come, ye blessed of my Father, inherit the kingdom prepared for you from the foundation of the world:
25:35 For I was an hungred, and ye gave me meat: I was thirsty, and ye gave me drink: I was a stranger, and ye took me in:
25:36 Naked, and ye clothed me: I was sick, and ye visited me: I was in prison, and ye came unto me.
25:37 Then shall the righteous answer him, saying, Lord, when saw we thee an hungred, and fed [thee]? or thirsty, and gave [thee] drink?
25:38 When saw we thee a stranger, and took [thee] in? or naked, and clothed [thee]?
25:39 Or when saw we thee sick, or in prison, and came unto thee?
25:40 And the King shall answer and say unto them, Verily I say unto you, Inasmuch as ye have done [it] unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done [it] unto me.

I believe this applies to you and what you do for your baby. I would want you to help take care of our baby. That would be more than enough for both myself and the Lord, I should think. Peace and joy be to you, my dearly beloved sister.
 

infinitekhanol

Active member
Jul 11, 2020
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#57
"Anamaria1, posted
One more question guys... would you yourself support your wife in fulfilling her promise, IF that would mean you should let big part of your home's property go into garbage? For example she has promised to put away all made in China products from your home because they persecute christians and HongKong people in China and are kind of qonquering the world and getting rich and powerful with all their cheep products so that all people want to please them. But after this promise you and your wife realize that you must throw away almost all electronics, clothes and furniture from your home, tv, computer... Would you be supporting her in this? Or would you be happy to find a Bible place that tells that the husband can say no to his wife's promise? .... Or would you simply divorce from her or what?[/QUOTE]


PRACTICAL CHRISTIANITY!!!
 

infinitekhanol

Active member
Jul 11, 2020
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#58
"
"Dino246, posted

No, I would not support her. If she made a promise as you described without my prior involvement and agreement, I would consider it to be her problem to sort out, and I would not tolerate her throwing out jointly-owned items. If she persisted in such foolishness, I would separate from her until she got her head straight. Divorce would be her choice, not mine.

A promise is not an unbreakable chain on your future behaviour; rather, it is a statement of commitment within your ability. James 4:13-15 speaks to this:

Come now, you who say, “Today or tomorrow we will go to such and such a city, and spend a year there and engage in business and make a profit.” Yet you do not know what your life will be like tomorrow. You are just a vapor that appears for a little while and then vanishes away. Instead, you ought to say, “If the Lord wills, we will live and also do this or that.”

You can promise to do something, and be prevented by forces outside your control. What then? Is your life over because you didn't fulfill your promise? No. However, being a person of your word is an aspect of godly character, as is owning your mistakes. Further, it matters to whom the promise was made. If it was to God, you need to repent. If it was to another person, explain, apologize, and move on. If to yourself, get over it. Next time, don't make rash promises.[/QUOTE]


Just wondering if your first paragraph is scriptural.
What if your wife did not know about James 4:13- 15 which you quoted before she made the promise?
Is there nothing like abetment to divorce if you decide to separate
Is there no other Christian way to settle?
ok
Let us hear other men's opinion.
 

infinitekhanol

Active member
Jul 11, 2020
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#59
"tourist, posted:

No part of my home's property is going in the garbage despite any promises made. It is best in a marriage not to make a promise that would affect the spouse who had no part in making such a promise. Most products today are made in China. Sorry about persecution but don't believe that a boycott of China is practical at this time.[/QUOTE]


The man shall leave his father and mother and cleave to his wife and the two shall be one flesh.

For better and for worse.


You are not alone, guy. Most men will take your path. But, the question is, is that a Christian solution.
 

infinitekhanol

Active member
Jul 11, 2020
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#60
TheLearner, posted:
Numbers 30 Easy-to-Read Version (ERV)
Special Promises
30 Moses spoke with all the leaders of the Israelite tribes and told them about these commands from the Lord:

Are you and your wife a member of one of the tribes of Israel? If not, then the chapter is not even addressed to you and your wife is not a slave of it.[/QUOTE]

She asked a hypothetical question. if you are the man in that situation, what will you do. Give your honest answer.