The Imperfect Date

Well, I was gonna tell the story about this girl on a date that hung on to my arm when I first met with her and then hung on through the entire night - and it was a football game - and then hung on to it all the way to her place before she finally go. There was nerve damage. I'm positive blood congealed in my shoulder somewhere. There were finger imprints in my upper arm. But no I'm gonna let it all go because I think you shamed me. Then trumped it with "I have other stories...". That beats two weeks of tingling fingers.

But not the dreams.

I didn't do anything to you, lol.

Well looks like I did not delete all the post I was typing out gonna make a joke about probably being a bad date before I replied to you. Hate when I ruin a joke and don't even get to do a punch line............LOL Doooooohh, pay attention boy now...........LOL

Ha! No no. I was just comparing stories - of which I came in second. Not you at all. But I am looking for a little sympathy here. You gotta think about it. It was a football game so there's standing in line at the gate (arm held). Concessions (arm), finding seat (arm held) stumbling by other people to get to the seat (with arm held), standing up when there's touchdowns, interceptions, etc - arm. It was hideous. I thought it would never end. But no, you didn't do anything to me.

I'm glad there was no permanent damage.

What you ruin a joke? I don't believe you? That could never happen...

I knew exactly what you were saying at the top of the post and got a good laugh out of it...

I was just wondering how it fit in with the story about my dad...LOL

Did you notice how I just used that wink and smile and smile and wink....

Did I do it right?



LOL

This is why we have a second amendment LOL

Really, that would have creeped me out. (Actually had a DUDE do something like that to me. Yuck.)

Hey no fair you are enjoying his just a little bit to much............LOL

What... it was a perfect and hilarious joke...

And I seriously mean that

Haha, that sounds terrible.

Oh yeah from your vantage point it looks peachy and great...............LOL

I don’t have any stories to share lol.

I forget my bad dates or my mind has permanently blanked them out. you dont really want to know lol

I am not used to tattoos. I went on about three dates with this guy, ,met online, awhile ago. First date, he was wearing long sleeves and pants so I did not see any tattoos. Second date, he wore a polo shirt and I saw that he had tattoos. Third date he wore shorts and I saw more tattoos. Anyway wasn't a huge fan of his tattoos either, he had a skull and things of that nature. They weren't bad dates but I was just surprised in a bad way each time.

I haven't had many dates. I've probably turned down more than I've had. There are some things I don't let myself get pressured into doing if I don't want to... and this is one of them. I've been chased... man, at least half a dozen times, sometimes very aggressively. Women can be scary.

And I'm super prudish, I'm not ashamed to admit it. I've never even kissed a girl - except kinda once in elementary school where 5-6 guys actually tried to physically force me and a girl I was friends with to kiss - and I intend for my first kiss to be on my wedding day, Lord willing.

My most awkward was my first date. It was my senior year of high school. I went to a really small Christian high school, and honestly wasn't close with anyone in my class of 10. We didn't have prom but had a junior/senior banquet instead. I should have gone my junior year and skipped the one my senior year. Instead I skipped my junior year and went to the banquet my senior year... anyways the one my junior year was on a yacht cruise out of Baltimore Harbor. The one my senior year... was a rented barn in the middle of nowhere, lol. Oh man, now that I think about it it sounds like the setup of a horror movie, haha!

There was this one gal in my class who always seemed to think we would get together eventually, but our values were just too different. I didn't want to skip the banquet that year but I also didn't want to go alone, so I asked a really nice gal that I had worked with for several years and that I liked. Turns out she had a boyfriend but she said she would go anyways. I probably should have... disentangled from that situation right then. I have no idea how women think. Maybe she thought we were just going as friends. And honestly, I have no idea what I was thinking. Was she a friend or a romantic interest? I really don't even have a clue, even today.

Well, I went to pick her up and met her mom for the first time. I immediately felt bad because she had gotten a nice prom-esque dress and I had opted for a suit not a tux. The dress was a bit racy for my school's standards, too, lol. I hadn't been to the place before and this was back in the days when GPS wasn't readily available. I had a small handheld GPS for hiking but nothing for driving directions. It was the flip phone era still. I got pretty lost trying to find this random farm in the middle of nowhere. It was so awkward. She was a really good sport about it, and fortunately I had left us enough time that it didn't end up being a big deal... but man, it was so awkward. So the evening was off to a good start.

It was all downhill from there. The banquet ended up being a catered meal... and that was it. There wasn't much to do except sit around and talk (no music or dancing at my Christian school). There was a horse carriage ride around the property, but it was short, very uncomfortable (I didn't care but a lot of the gals complained) and chilly. The gals were cursing the fool who thought this venue would be a good idea for women wearing nice dresses. Climbing up into the carriage was apparently a real challenge also. Ah, the trials of womanhood! The farm was also pretty muddy, lol.

And the company! Like I said, there were no activities to do or anything, so it was literally hours of sitting around trying to think of things to talk about. And I already mentioned I was not close with my classmates... spent more than enough time with them at school. And it was awkward for my date who didn't know anyone. The whole thing was a fiasco. But my date was a really good sport about it all. I couldn't apologize enough to her afterwards...

Ugh, I'm cringing just remembering it!!

In the spirit of wisebeardman:

wots a date?

Since I ruined my joke I was gonna do by not deleting my opening line in a reply to 1ofThem..........LOL Reckon I will go with what was a bad date to me. It was one of my date nights with my ex. The date and she and I was not the bad part it was the 3rd wheel we picked up.

Which happened to be a officer of the law. I had suggested hey lets grab some sleeping bags, blankets, and pillows. Take my truck up into the mountains and park it off road so we can see the lights of the city and the stars above and lets lay out all that bedding in the back of the truck and carry on like some teenager's, so we did.

Then our 3rd wheel happened upon us flashlight in hand and lets us know we need to being taking ourselves on back home......LOL

LOL...

And you know it's the last call when the LAW comes walking in....hahaha

Seriously though, I've been on a couple dates where I was hoping and praying that a cop would just somehow magically appear... lol

Im gonna share the bad dates that Danielle Steel wrote about in her novel The Dating Game as some of them were really bad. Ok all of them were except for the last one where she put in her cheesy happy ending.

If nothing it was a fun read until it got too unrealistic, but thats quite normal for a Danielle Steel novel. so the heroine is a Forty six year old divorcee...her husband left her for somone fifteen years younger and all her friends insist she needs to find a man and because shes apparently way too beautiful to be alone and her two adult children have flown the nest

a. the date where her married friends set her up with a plaid wearing drunk guy at a dinner party
b. the date where her workmates set her up with an artist who sculpts male anatomy...who is also racist, and farts a lot
c. the smooth producer guy who takes her to the Grammy awards in his own private plane, escorts her in a limo and buys her a chanel handbag. Then the inevitable happens though they wear a condom But hes not exclusive, she forgot to ask
d. the widowed dad her daughter sets her up with who cant stop talking about his deceased wife so she tries to seduce him to get his mind off his wife
e. the french photographer who is on a working visa who is also fifteen years younger than her, so she has a fling, but gets annoyed that he acts like a boy and hates his ex wife. He proposes but she doesnt accept

so finally she decides Ive had enough of men, im just gonna adopt a baby girl. On my own. Then lo and behold a friend of her daughters older husband who is his lawyer partner turns up and even drives her to the hospital to pick up her adopted baby whos being borrn and THEY get married.

?! btw her first husband was a lawyer too so dunno how long that will last. But the novel mercifully ends there. But the baby girl is called HOPE isnt that sweet. Even though she gets palmed off to a wet nurse after a few weeks while the couple goes on their round the world honeymoon, cos thats just what you do in a Danielle Steel novel.

It's a small dessert fruit. Watch out for the pits. They're like rocks.