Unhappy/confused about life in general.

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.
R

RaceBoy

Guest
#1
It's 2022 now and I'm 20 years old with nothing to show for. Nothing is what i want it to be, whether it's where I live or just my general life. I've been living with my parents for my entire life, and the one time i thought i could start my life is when COVID hit. It's almost like God doesn't want me to live on this earth happy because I've been seemingly unlucky for almost my entire adult life.
I always wanted to live in California (sadly I live in South Carolina, which isn't a bad state, but not where I really want to be) but California has gotten so expensive that's its nearly impossible to live there unless you're a millionaire.
I'm trying to get a car soon but the car I want (and nearly everything) has gone up in price that its no linger financially worth the cost. I've been priced out of the housing market so I can't afford rent, and I live in an area where the dating scene is basically pointless.
Riots and a seemingly out of control police force, along with the LGBTQ forcing their agenda on to society.

Sometimes I really miss the early 2010s when I actually enjoyed my life, and I can only imagine what life COULD of been like if I was an adult at those times.

But instead God has me born in the 2000s so I can struggle to make ends meet.
 

Subhumanoidal

Well-known member
Sep 17, 2018
4,044
3,146
113
#2
It's 2022 now and I'm 20 years old with nothing to show for. Nothing is what i want it to be, whether it's where I live or just my general life. I've been living with my parents for my entire life, and the one time i thought i could start my life is when COVID hit. It's almost like God doesn't want me to live on this earth happy because I've been seemingly unlucky for almost my entire adult life.
I always wanted to live in California (sadly I live in South Carolina, which isn't a bad state, but not where I really want to be) but California has gotten so expensive that's its nearly impossible to live there unless you're a millionaire.
I'm trying to get a car soon but the car I want (and nearly everything) has gone up in price that its no linger financially worth the cost. I've been priced out of the housing market so I can't afford rent, and I live in an area where the dating scene is basically pointless.
Riots and a seemingly out of control police force, along with the LGBTQ forcing their agenda on to society.

Sometimes I really miss the early 2010s when I actually enjoyed my life, and I can only imagine what life COULD of been like if I was an adult at those times.

But instead God has me born in the 2000s so I can struggle to make ends meet.
Umm... I'm 46, more than double your age, and literally nothing has gone as I had hoped. I currently live in NC, but spent 10 years in CA. I moved there around 98/99 and left around 2008. Guess what. It was expensive then, too.
I had always wanted to move to CA. Now I'm glad to be out.

As a teen I planned on being married in my 20s, and possibly working full time in ministry. Instead I ended up broke in CA in a dead end job I hated. And eventually homeless. And by the time I did move here to NC my health went gave out and I've been disabled since. I've also never married. Never owned my own place or even had an apartment of my own.

I could go on and on and on, but I think you get the point. All of this was before Covid.

So my life has been Very similar to yours (and probably worse), but 20 years earlier. Things aren't as different as you make them seem.
 

TabinRivCA

Well-known member
Oct 23, 2018
13,039
10,601
113
#3
It's 2022 now and I'm 20 years old with nothing to show for. Nothing is what i want it to be, whether it's where I live or just my general life. I've been living with my parents for my entire life, and the one time i thought i could start my life is when COVID hit. It's almost like God doesn't want me to live on this earth happy because I've been seemingly unlucky for almost my entire adult life.
I always wanted to live in California (sadly I live in South Carolina, which isn't a bad state, but not where I really want to be) but California has gotten so expensive that's its nearly impossible to live there unless you're a millionaire.
I'm trying to get a car soon but the car I want (and nearly everything) has gone up in price that its no linger financially worth the cost. I've been priced out of the housing market so I can't afford rent, and I live in an area where the dating scene is basically pointless.
Riots and a seemingly out of control police force, along with the LGBTQ forcing their agenda on to society.

Sometimes I really miss the early 2010s when I actually enjoyed my life, and I can only imagine what life COULD of been like if I was an adult at those times.

But instead God has me born in the 2000s so I can struggle to make ends meet.
Are there no churches by you that you attend? During covid church attendance went down so many churches started online services and even small group Bible studies on zoom. I'm in two online groups, one local to me and one from all over the US. We get to know each other and pray for each other and study the Bible of course. It's called Harvest at Home, btw.
In your situation settle for a good less expensive car. I had a Jaguar a few decades ago and still want another one but realize that may not happen, but it could. There's nothing wrong with living w/your parents actually it's quite smart, unless there's a problem of some sort between you all.
I have always lived in CA and many people rent out rooms in their house, like me, for under $500. It sounds like you need a more positive outlook and as a Christian with the God of miracles on your side, you actually don't have it so bad. Whenever I use water I think of the billions of people who don't have access to clean water or sanitation or bathrooms & food.
So I would be thankful to God for what you have, hopeful when you pray knowing that God listens and share the Gospel whenever you're led to because that's what we are told to do in whatever way we can, ie a smile, a helping hand, a prayer said with someone etc. God bless you and open your spiritual eyes to the fruit of the Spirit inside of you.
 
R

RaceBoy

Guest
#4
Umm... I'm 46, more than double your age, and literally nothing has gone as I had hoped. I currently live in NC, but spent 10 years in CA. I moved there around 98/99 and left around 2008. Guess what. It was expensive then, too.
I had always wanted to move to CA. Now I'm glad to be out.

As a teen I planned on being married in my 20s, and possibly working full time in ministry. Instead I ended up broke in CA in a dead end job I hated. And eventually homeless. And by the time I did move here to NC my health went gave out and I've been disabled since. I've also never married. Never owned my own place or even had an apartment of my own.

I could go on and on and on, but I think you get the point. All of this was before Covid.

So my life has been Very similar to yours (and probably worse), but 20 years earlier. Things aren't as different as you make them seem.
I'm sorry that all those things happened to you... I understand that I'm not the only one who's suffered, but I still have emotions and I still feel pain... Yes you've suffered like me, but my thoughts and feelings are not the same as yours.
 
R

RaceBoy

Guest
#5
Are there no churches by you that you attend? During covid church attendance went down so many churches started online services and even small group Bible studies on zoom. I'm in two online groups, one local to me and one from all over the US. We get to know each other and pray for each other and study the Bible of course. It's called Harvest at Home, btw.
In your situation settle for a good less expensive car. I had a Jaguar a few decades ago and still want another one but realize that may not happen, but it could. There's nothing wrong with living w/your parents actually it's quite smart, unless there's a problem of some sort between you all.
I have always lived in CA and many people rent out rooms in their house, like me, for under $500. It sounds like you need a more positive outlook and as a Christian with the God of miracles on your side, you actually don't have it so bad. Whenever I use water I think of the billions of people who don't have access to clean water or sanitation or bathrooms & food.
So I would be thankful to God for what you have, hopeful when you pray knowing that God listens and share the Gospel whenever you're led to because that's what we are told to do in whatever way we can, ie a smile, a helping hand, a prayer said with someone etc. God bless you and open your spiritual eyes to the fruit of the Spirit inside of you.
There are currently no churches I'm attending at the moment, nor do I intend to. As for the car... I'm probably gonna drive my brother's car, but the car that I went isn't even that expensive or new. It's just the price and timing has ruined my plans, guess I have bad luck.

I don't wanna live with my parents. It's too embarrassing, and makes me feel like I failed.

Congrats on living in my dream state of Cali. I'm probably going to get a room mate it I decide to live there...

Life is not good... Unless you rich then there's really nothing to life besides working for most of your life to get nothing in return. Yes I don't have it so bad, but that doesn't mean I'm happy or where I want to be.

Honestly no one will truly understand how I feel and that's fine. Just wish that things were different.
 

TabinRivCA

Well-known member
Oct 23, 2018
13,039
10,601
113
#6
There are currently no churches I'm attending at the moment, nor do I intend to. As for the car... I'm probably gonna drive my brother's car, but the car that I went isn't even that expensive or new. It's just the price and timing has ruined my plans, guess I have bad luck.

I don't wanna live with my parents. It's too embarrassing, and makes me feel like I failed.

Congrats on living in my dream state of Cali. I'm probably going to get a room mate it I decide to live there...

Life is not good... Unless you rich then there's really nothing to life besides working for most of your life to get nothing in return. Yes I don't have it so bad, but that doesn't mean I'm happy or where I want to be.

Honestly no one will truly understand how I feel and that's fine. Just wish that things were different.
Cali is nice but like most over populated places there are more and more homeless ones who actually have nothing to look forward to. Shame on cities, states and countries who ignore the plight of people who for whatever reason are dying as people pass them by.
Who's gonna judge you for living with your parents? Out of respect for them, make the best of it until you leave.
I'm older than you and have finally realized life is meaningless if I'm not doing something for the Lord. Everyone has a choice to be happy (working but also maintaining a close relationship with the Lord) or mopey. Imo having a vision of life as problematic is missing the point of why God put us here. 'The joy of the Lord is our strength'.
I know we all have different tendencies, but some things that aren't from God, we need to change. I would suggest reading some Psalms every day and see how people who know God worship Him for He is worthy.
'Seek ye first the Kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added unto you' Mt 6:33.
Make a choice to be happy, pray & praise God, one day we will face Him.
 
Mar 4, 2020
8,614
3,691
113
#7
It's 2022 now and I'm 20 years old with nothing to show for. Nothing is what i want it to be, whether it's where I live or just my general life. I've been living with my parents for my entire life, and the one time i thought i could start my life is when COVID hit. It's almost like God doesn't want me to live on this earth happy because I've been seemingly unlucky for almost my entire adult life.
I always wanted to live in California (sadly I live in South Carolina, which isn't a bad state, but not where I really want to be) but California has gotten so expensive that's its nearly impossible to live there unless you're a millionaire.
I'm trying to get a car soon but the car I want (and nearly everything) has gone up in price that its no linger financially worth the cost. I've been priced out of the housing market so I can't afford rent, and I live in an area where the dating scene is basically pointless.
Riots and a seemingly out of control police force, along with the LGBTQ forcing their agenda on to society.

Sometimes I really miss the early 2010s when I actually enjoyed my life, and I can only imagine what life COULD of been like if I was an adult at those times.

But instead God has me born in the 2000s so I can struggle to make ends meet.
Yes I under how difficult that is from your current perspective. Having been born into poverty without enough food to eat at times, my perspective of what constitutes being rich has changed. Maybe you can see that if you have a stable home life, food, and clean clothes that fit that you’re doing pretty good. The situation is pretty dire in many places in the world.

Covid has caused many problems. I understand that having problems often seems like they are designed specifically for us, but rarely that is the case. It’s more like we’re all in this rat race together and there are struggles to get ahead. Many problems are beyond our control as individuals. Our perspective is what matters most.

Ever heard of the serenity prayer? I think it’s very good wisdom we can apply in practical ways in life:

“God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
courage to change the things I can,
and wisdom to know the difference.”
 

Deuteronomy

Well-known member
Jun 11, 2018
3,316
3,675
113
68
#8
Hello @RaceBoy, I can't imagine what it must be like to have lived through the COVID lockdown insanity at your age (I would have gone CRAZY). That said, you need to figure out where to go from here so that you can begin to move on, to 'get your life started' as you mentioned in the OP (y)(y)

As a believer, choosing to trust God to see you to past this time in your life (and then to see you to the place that you need to be) is very important .. see Isaiah 40:31; Jeremiah 29:11; Lamentations 3:22-24. As Pastor Chuck Swindoll once said too, "two words will help you cope when you run low on hope, accept and trust".


Here is one of the reasons that we choose to trust Him (one of His great promises to all of us who are or who will be His adopted children, that is).

Romans 8
28 We know that God causes ~all things~ to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.


Getting the majority of your focus off of yourself and your present situation, and putting it on God and others instead, will help .. e.g. Psalm 37:4; Galatians 6:9-10.

As missionary/author Elisabeth Elliot said,

Do you often feel like parched ground, unable to produce anything worthwhile? I do. When I am in need of refreshment, it isn't easy to think of the needs of others. But I have found that if, instead of praying for my own comfort and satisfaction, I ask the Lord to enable me to give to others, an amazing thing often happens - I find my own needs wonderfully met. Refreshment comes in ways I would never have thought of, both for others, and then, incidentally, for myself.


It also helps me, especially when I'm in a rut, to look for ways to obey the commands in this short passage, to practice the presence of God in my life (so to speak) by doing so :)

1 Thessalonians 5
16 Rejoice always;
17 pray without ceasing;

18 in everything give thanks; for this is God’s will for you in Christ Jesus.


If you haven't done this before, start by looking for something small, but wonderful to rejoice in, and then to pray to God and thank Him for it (whatever it is, even if it's something as simple as a warm summer breeze hitting your face). Then keep on doing so, turning your eyes/heart toward Him, that is, and (as the hymn tells us) "the things of earth will grow strangely dim, in the light of His glory and grace".

Praying for you!!

~Deut


"The secret is Christ in me, not me in a different set of circumstances" ~Elisabeth Elliot
 
R

RaceBoy

Guest
#9
Cali is nice but like most over populated places there are more and more homeless ones who actually have nothing to look forward to. Shame on cities, states and countries who ignore the plight of people who for whatever reason are dying as people pass them by.
Who's gonna judge you for living with your parents? Out of respect for them, make the best of it until you leave.
I'm older than you and have finally realized life is meaningless if I'm not doing something for the Lord. Everyone has a choice to be happy (working but also maintaining a close relationship with the Lord) or mopey. Imo having a vision of life as problematic is missing the point of why God put us here. 'The joy of the Lord is our strength'.
I know we all have different tendencies, but some things that aren't from God, we need to change. I would suggest reading some Psalms every day and see how people who know God worship Him for He is worthy.
'Seek ye first the Kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added unto you' Mt 6:33.
Make a choice to be happy, pray & praise God, one day we will face Him.
Still sucks that I'm living with my parents... And homeless in Cali are just another thing that's unlucky for me... My dream state gets ruined year after year further causing me more unhappiness.
 
R

RaceBoy

Guest
#10
Yes I under how difficult that is from your current perspective. Having been born into poverty without enough food to eat at times, my perspective of what constitutes being rich has changed. Maybe you can see that if you have a stable home life, food, and clean clothes that fit that you’re doing pretty good. The situation is pretty dire in many places in the world.

Covid has caused many problems. I understand that having problems often seems like they are designed specifically for us, but rarely that is the case. It’s more like we’re all in this rat race together and there are struggles to get ahead. Many problems are beyond our control as individuals. Our perspective is what matters most.

Ever heard of the serenity prayer? I think it’s very good wisdom we can apply in practical ways in life:

“God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
courage to change the things I can,
and wisdom to know the difference.”
Just more proof that the world sucks 😔
 

JohnDB

Well-known member
Jan 16, 2021
6,176
2,478
113
#11
A block is either something that stops you or its something that you climb on top of to get a better view of the terrain in front of you.

However....

God guides a man's path for his benefit...
Meaning that God is directing your path for good reasons. Ones that you will enjoy.

Your attitude is all you truly own. God is Sovereign over the rest.

"Whatever my lot Thou hast taught me to say, ' It is well with my soul'"

Great line that I appreciate more and more every year.
 
Mar 4, 2020
8,614
3,691
113
#12
Just more proof that the world sucks 😔
Life can be difficult. Just straight up the truth. We’re strong, tough as nails even. Don’t worry God is with us forever. There are ways to use unfortunate circumstances to your advantage. With every problem there is the potential for gain and profit because these things effect everyone.

For example, when Covid hit we should have known to invest in face mask companies because we would have gained a lot. Get the picture? You can use world events to your advantage to make money and potentially make a lot.
 
R

RaceBoy

Guest
#13
Yeah I really wish I was born in the 90s... I could be married with children right now, and in my own house. Life sucks....
 

Jesusfollower

Active member
Oct 21, 2021
352
197
43
jamaica
#14
you
Yeah I really wish I was born in the 90s... I could be married with children right now, and in my own house. Life sucks....

I used to think the same at your age, the ideal is to get married, buy a nice big house be successful $$$. this is the current world view. The life that GOD have given you can be much much more than this. Who you should be trying to please and impess right now is GOD, get close to him, pray with an open heart, he does listen and will do what is best for you. You were called and belong to Christ if you will let him in your life. God will decide who was successful or not not this world's standards.

The times we live in are not pretty, in the fifties when my father was a young man, life was much easier than today, time change you have to adapt and do the best you can in this era. As for living with your parents absolutely O.K. Family and friends are the most precious thing we all have. Enjoy living with your parents while you can it is a blessing in these times, just help them out as best you can.

Never forget that GOD is always with you, he loves you.

Blessings,

JF
 
R

RaceBoy

Guest
#15
Update.... I got my permit yesterday and was required to sign (I think its called) a draft for the military. That means for the next 5-6 years I may have to go to war (if necessary) if things go downhill.

Yeah My life is looking more like a curse.
 

JohnDB

Well-known member
Jan 16, 2021
6,176
2,478
113
#16
Update.... I got my permit yesterday and was required to sign (I think its called) a draft for the military. That means for the next 5-6 years I may have to go to war (if necessary) if things go downhill.

Yeah My life is looking more like a curse.
You have to register but that's about it.

They haven't used the draft for over 80 years...and there's a lot of exemptions for various things like medical, education and age. And the last time they drafted anybody there was a huge outcry from the public...


But congratulations on passing the test to get your permit.

Now you just need some drive time practice.

I took my son to the church parking lot to learn to drive backwards and parallel park. I know it seems strange but the lessons really come in handy.
 
R

RaceBoy

Guest
#17
You have to register but that's about it.

They haven't used the draft for over 80 years...and there's a lot of exemptions for various things like medical, education and age. And the last time they drafted anybody there was a huge outcry from the public...


But congratulations on passing the test to get your permit.

Now you just need some drive time practice.

I took my son to the church parking lot to learn to drive backwards and parallel park. I know it seems strange but the lessons really come in handy.
Mate for all you know I could be fighting in a war in the next 2-3 years... You think I'm going to make it in the military not knowing how to swim, and with a weight of about 130lbs?

Just admit my life is terrible...
 

JohnDB

Well-known member
Jan 16, 2021
6,176
2,478
113
#18
Mate for all you know I could be fighting in a war in the next 2-3 years... You think I'm going to make it in the military not knowing how to swim, and with a weight of about 130lbs?

Just admit my life is terrible...
ROFL....
Your life isn't terrible.
If only we could switch places....*sigh*

And I don't swim...I can but never enjoyed it much....I like air more than swimming. If I learned to scuba dive I'd be the guy with two tanks because I'd be a gas hog.

And you are 130lbs?
You are practically a porker by comparison to what I was when I was your age. Yeah....I was the pencil necked geek looking teenager/young adult with white blonde hair. I stood out no matter how hard I tried to blend in.

And I ate a LOT of groceries....at least I thought so.

So much to learn and do out there...and where your school mates are all about hyping physical strength and getting all the girlfriends with the best appearances....it's not exactly going to work out so well for them. It only appears to for the moment.

Lots of things I know that I'd love to learn....like custom CNC machining. (Do you know what a custom grasshopper escapement skeletal clock sells for?) Takes like 3 weeks to build. Pays the rent for a year.

Most cnc machinists don't get enough time to build one because they are way too busy making custom machined parts for everyone else...and getting paid! Never met one yet that didn't have ALL the luxuries in life they wanted. And those they didn't have they could make.

Then there's all the engineering type things....math is your friend.

Craftsman run the world...right after they build it. If you like putting together puzzles or models....try it on for size.

And if for some reason the military did take you in a draft (not happening but just for the outside chance) they are desperate for machinists. Someone who can make anything out of various metals or other materials is extremely useful....you don't want to be the guy on the front lines used as cannon fodder....you want to be in the rear making gear for the muscle bound jocks to use and be targeted.
 

blueluna5

Well-known member
Jul 30, 2018
647
383
63
#19
It's 2022 now and I'm 20 years old with nothing to show for. Nothing is what i want it to be, whether it's where I live or just my general life. I've been living with my parents for my entire life, and the one time i thought i could start my life is when COVID hit. It's almost like God doesn't want me to live on this earth happy because I've been seemingly unlucky for almost my entire adult life.
I always wanted to live in California (sadly I live in South Carolina, which isn't a bad state, but not where I really want to be) but California has gotten so expensive that's its nearly impossible to live there unless you're a millionaire.
I'm trying to get a car soon but the car I want (and nearly everything) has gone up in price that its no linger financially worth the cost. I've been priced out of the housing market so I can't afford rent, and I live in an area where the dating scene is basically pointless.
Riots and a seemingly out of control police force, along with the LGBTQ forcing their agenda on to society.

Sometimes I really miss the early 2010s when I actually enjoyed my life, and I can only imagine what life COULD of been like if I was an adult at those times.

But instead God has me born in the 2000s so I can struggle to make ends meet.
It's a terrible time to be so young for sure. My gosh- can't even imagine dating during the time of forced masks. Smh

At 20 though you're basically a baby. 😆 I know it's super frustrating though. I will tell you that I'm one of those people who always has to wait for "good" things in life. I waited years for my husband, years for my career, years for a baby, years for a house (not even my forever home). It's not like I was asking to be a millionaire, and I definitely know people who got all of the things I wanted very quickly.

But... through the waiting I learned an important skill, contentment. I know that's annoying to read when you just want God to give you what you need like he promised. Being content is extremely important though. It's what makes a person "happy." It's in quotes bc no matter what you'll never always be happy, but you can always be content. It's outside of your situation.
 
Oct 27, 2022
62
27
8
#20
It's 2022 now and I'm 20 years old with nothing to show for. Nothing is what i want it to be, whether it's where I live or just my general life. I've been living with my parents for my entire life, and the one time i thought i could start my life is when COVID hit. It's almost like God doesn't want me to live on this earth happy because I've been seemingly unlucky for almost my entire adult life.
I always wanted to live in California (sadly I live in South Carolina, which isn't a bad state, but not where I really want to be) but California has gotten so expensive that's its nearly impossible to live there unless you're a millionaire.
I'm trying to get a car soon but the car I want (and nearly everything) has gone up in price that its no linger financially worth the cost. I've been priced out of the housing market so I can't afford rent, and I live in an area where the dating scene is basically pointless.
Riots and a seemingly out of control police force, along with the LGBTQ forcing their agenda on to society.

Sometimes I really miss the early 2010s when I actually enjoyed my life, and I can only imagine what life COULD of been like if I was an adult at those times.

But instead God has me born in the 2000s so I can struggle to make ends meet.
RaceBoy, The truth is, we are in the final generation that will see the return of Christ. Over the last 60 years, you have seen people turn away from God and from studying the bible and it is no longer taught in our schools. As a result our culture has deteriorated and evil is allowed to flourish. What is right is called wrong and what is wrong is regarded as right. I know it's tough to see it all go down but understand, we are the children of the Living God. He expects us to make a stand against the evil and speak out against it even though we may suffer persecution for doing so. In the not so distant future, Satan himself will appear on earth, before Jesus returns, claiming to be God, II Thes 2:1-4, and will deceive many people into worshipping him, thus causing a great falling away from worshipping the true God. I would encourage you to study the word of God to understand what is getting ready to happen. God may have you on earth to make a stand against Satan when he comes pretending to be God. Don't ever give up on life or your faith. Just decide to have a positive attitude towards life, work hard at your job and God will help make your life a success.