The Message Within The Silence
I heard this song in worship today, and the lyrics brought out the conflict within my soul. Not that God isn’t worthy but in the pain whether you say yes, no, or wait.
{And in the blessing, in the pain, You are worthy
Whether You say "yes" or "no" or "wait", You are worthy
Through it all, I choose to say, "You are worthy"
I'll never stop singing Your praise
No I'll never stop singing Your praise
And when I finally see Your face, I'll cry worthy
And when You wipe these tears away, I'll cry worthy
Above every other name, You are worthy}
—Worthy of My Song by Phil Wickham
https://m.youtube.com/results?sp=mAEA&search_query=Your+worthy+of+my+song
After years of praying, I accepted the words no or wait within the pain. Then after more years, I grew content with weakness and accepted it as reality. But the weakness can be so aggravating that, at times, I have to focus on what it means to live.
In search of truth within the theological interpretations of healing, I was challenged to look at pain as the enemy. Which, for me, was like opening an old wound that I had given over to God many years ago, but according to this interpretation, I now had to dive back into the mindset of Biblical healing for the physical within myself, which I had initially accepted God’s will as no or wait to be healed. I was content with either and willing to suffer either way.
After church service, I had two different people pray over me for healing. I never attended the church in search of healing but was challenged to look at it differently.
After we got home, I decided to go on a prayer walk.
As I was praying and walking away from home, I only heard silence. The longer I walked, the silence only grew. I felt frustrated and looked down to see a dead butterfly. The only reason it caught my eye was it was alone and very colorful.
Not thinking much of it, I picked it up and carried it to show the kids later. On my way back, I still heard silence, and out of frustration, I asked, “ God are you trying to tell me something through a dead butterfly?!” So I kept walking back home and then saw the same type of butterfly all alone flying next to me.
Coincidence? Maybe. But It did force me to think of the symbolism here. A dead butterfly walking away from home. A living butterfly walking back home. From death to life.
But it grabbed my attention after reaching the house; I started to study the idea from scripture which you will not see the word butterfly; you will see moth, which is very similar to the butterfly.
The moth in scripture represents fragility and decay as moths eat away old garments. The lifespan is also short for these creatures. It reminds us that life is short for us all compared to eternity.
The stage of a butterfly from a caterpillar and cocoon to a butterfly, for example, is a transformation. The word transform is metamorpheo in Greek, from which we get the English term metamorphosis which is what a butterfly goes through.
It is interesting that to be renewed, a transformation must occur. This carries salvation metaphors, but for the Christian, we are being renewed daily. I want to highlight 3 of these verses.
Romans 12:2 ESV
Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.
Isaiah 40:31 ESV
But they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.
2 Corinthians 4:16 ESV
So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day.
As you can see, a transformation within the renewal of the mind, a renewal in strength, and again, our inner self is being renewed day by day to discern the will of God.
I understand, like the butterfly, that we are fragile and acceptable to death, but in life, so much is fragile within sin and decay. Everything is affected by this fragility including your job, your family, your home, and your body. But every lifespan has to end while another begins.
The self today should not be the same person the next day. You should have learned, grown, and matured into a new you for a new day. Months later, all of a sudden, all these days add up, and you are noticeably no longer the same person you were at the start.
I don’t rightly know what this prayer walk means to me per se in the realm of healing, but it only reinforced the idea that by this daily renewal, it is always God-centered. So may it be physical or spiritual renewal, I will boast either way, for when I am weak, He is strong.
2 Corinthians 12:9-10 ESV
9 But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. 10 For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.
Some debate this verse to imply this can not be applied to physical ailments or prescriptive for everyone, but I believe it is. The context is not there to be descriptive enough to rule out taking this verse as encouragement to those who suffer.
So I encourage the reader to learn from such a tiny beautiful insect like the Butterfly to move towards transformation and be renewed every day in Christ.
I heard this song in worship today, and the lyrics brought out the conflict within my soul. Not that God isn’t worthy but in the pain whether you say yes, no, or wait.
{And in the blessing, in the pain, You are worthy
Whether You say "yes" or "no" or "wait", You are worthy
Through it all, I choose to say, "You are worthy"
I'll never stop singing Your praise
No I'll never stop singing Your praise
And when I finally see Your face, I'll cry worthy
And when You wipe these tears away, I'll cry worthy
Above every other name, You are worthy}
—Worthy of My Song by Phil Wickham
https://m.youtube.com/results?sp=mAEA&search_query=Your+worthy+of+my+song
After years of praying, I accepted the words no or wait within the pain. Then after more years, I grew content with weakness and accepted it as reality. But the weakness can be so aggravating that, at times, I have to focus on what it means to live.
In search of truth within the theological interpretations of healing, I was challenged to look at pain as the enemy. Which, for me, was like opening an old wound that I had given over to God many years ago, but according to this interpretation, I now had to dive back into the mindset of Biblical healing for the physical within myself, which I had initially accepted God’s will as no or wait to be healed. I was content with either and willing to suffer either way.
After church service, I had two different people pray over me for healing. I never attended the church in search of healing but was challenged to look at it differently.
After we got home, I decided to go on a prayer walk.
As I was praying and walking away from home, I only heard silence. The longer I walked, the silence only grew. I felt frustrated and looked down to see a dead butterfly. The only reason it caught my eye was it was alone and very colorful.
Not thinking much of it, I picked it up and carried it to show the kids later. On my way back, I still heard silence, and out of frustration, I asked, “ God are you trying to tell me something through a dead butterfly?!” So I kept walking back home and then saw the same type of butterfly all alone flying next to me.
Coincidence? Maybe. But It did force me to think of the symbolism here. A dead butterfly walking away from home. A living butterfly walking back home. From death to life.
But it grabbed my attention after reaching the house; I started to study the idea from scripture which you will not see the word butterfly; you will see moth, which is very similar to the butterfly.
The moth in scripture represents fragility and decay as moths eat away old garments. The lifespan is also short for these creatures. It reminds us that life is short for us all compared to eternity.
The stage of a butterfly from a caterpillar and cocoon to a butterfly, for example, is a transformation. The word transform is metamorpheo in Greek, from which we get the English term metamorphosis which is what a butterfly goes through.
It is interesting that to be renewed, a transformation must occur. This carries salvation metaphors, but for the Christian, we are being renewed daily. I want to highlight 3 of these verses.
Romans 12:2 ESV
Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind, that by testing you may discern what is the will of God, what is good and acceptable and perfect.
Isaiah 40:31 ESV
But they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint.
2 Corinthians 4:16 ESV
So we do not lose heart. Though our outer self is wasting away, our inner self is being renewed day by day.
As you can see, a transformation within the renewal of the mind, a renewal in strength, and again, our inner self is being renewed day by day to discern the will of God.
I understand, like the butterfly, that we are fragile and acceptable to death, but in life, so much is fragile within sin and decay. Everything is affected by this fragility including your job, your family, your home, and your body. But every lifespan has to end while another begins.
The self today should not be the same person the next day. You should have learned, grown, and matured into a new you for a new day. Months later, all of a sudden, all these days add up, and you are noticeably no longer the same person you were at the start.
I don’t rightly know what this prayer walk means to me per se in the realm of healing, but it only reinforced the idea that by this daily renewal, it is always God-centered. So may it be physical or spiritual renewal, I will boast either way, for when I am weak, He is strong.
2 Corinthians 12:9-10 ESV
9 But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. 10 For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.
Some debate this verse to imply this can not be applied to physical ailments or prescriptive for everyone, but I believe it is. The context is not there to be descriptive enough to rule out taking this verse as encouragement to those who suffer.
So I encourage the reader to learn from such a tiny beautiful insect like the Butterfly to move towards transformation and be renewed every day in Christ.
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