Praying can be frustrating.

C.S. Lewis good read so I hear? Was he Christian?

“These all died in faith, not having received the promises, but having seen them afar off, and were persuaded of them, and embraced them, and confessed that they were strangers and pilgrims on the earth. For they that say such things declare plainly that they seek a country.

But now they desire a better country, that is, an heavenly: wherefore God is not ashamed to be called their God: for he hath prepared for them a city.

……And these all, having obtained a good report through faith, received not the promise: God having provided some better thing for us, that they without us should not be made perfect.”
‭‭Hebrews‬ ‭11:13-14, 16, 39-40‬ ‭KJV‬

“ I shall carry the old rugged cross , and exchange it someday for a crown “

the promises are when Look to the things Christ promised like life after death and a perfect kingdom to dwell in until he brings a perfect earth for all his people in the end.

This life is just our journey home not our home or a place that’s going to always “prosper us financially“ like so many preach it’s worth it because death is no longer our end, but the doorway home to reality with Christ so if we don’t get what we want now it’s not unusual at least we’re better of than those we need about there in Hebrews no one is setting us on fire or cutting us in half with a saw , no one is persecuting most of us like that but if we don’t have the newest car , we don’t own a home without a mortgage or have new boat those aren’t matters of Gods kingdom food , shelter and contentment is

It has been found that touch calms our nervous center and slows down our heartbeat. Human touch also lowers blood pressure as well as cortisol, our stress hormone. It also triggers the release of oxytocin, a hormone known for promoting emotional bonding to others.

Perhaps if you read Psalm 73 you will understand why.

@JohnB ive been reading all your topics regarding your bad misfortune with one church which has ruined your dating life and I‘M sorry for that. I hope God gives you what you’re looking for one day.

But sometimes I wonder if your threads are about dating advice. So, have you tried dating outside of any churches or maybe in different countries?
I dunno, just throwing it out there. God bless you and guide you.

Different churches, online, singles groups. I've had friends who know me and were there on my efforts, tell me. John, you've done everything any could ask of you, it just hasn't happened. Another friend said, "John I have never seen anyone put so much into dating and come up with nothing" It's as if the hand of GOD keeps working against you. Sometimes GOD's hand in on you in ways you wish it wasn't.

yet the pain of being single remains.

I’m sorry to hear that. But have you tried dating people of different cultures and languages?
‘Sometimes that’s a clean slate to better know someone where there’s a language barrier in between. I know this has worked for one of my friends.

He is but if I remember correctly he believed nonbelievers had a chance to go to Heaven.

Prayer is meant to get us into God's presence where there is fulness of joy and reward evermore. There is nothing wrong with making requests of God...only not being accepting of His answer. God is good and He will never give us anything that will lessen heaven for us or leave with us anything that would make glory less. If you begin here you will begin to understand why God does and doesn't answer prayer.

I don't really blame the church, it's the anger I had with them. From the day they accepted the book, "I kissed Dating Goodbye" I argued with them calling the book stupid. I got angry at people in the church who thought if they kept themselves pure and holy before GOD, by not having physical contact before marriage, that GOD would bless the marriage. I told them they were playing games with GOD. I told them nowhere in the bible does it tell you no physical contact before marriage. They refused to listen to common sense.

Could be that you are your own hindrance to your prayers. I know it sounds rough but truly consider yourself. See how you could be your own obstacle. I know you want companionship but are you a good companion? Do you have many good friends, interesting pass times, hobbies?
As I have said before. Dating and dating sites and all those gimmicks are useless. I have never met anyone who successfully found someone that way. You are more likely to find a mate out in the wilderness fishing alone.

I see. I think you may have spent a lot of time maybe holding this anger with them and it’s affecting your dating? Forgive them for what they did to you and be free and look at dating with a new set of eyes free from your past.
I’ve had some anger issues with people at work too, and I had to forgive them so I could free myself.

"
34 “Then the King will say to those on his right, ‘Come, you who are blessed by my Father, inherit the Kingdom prepared for you from the creation of the world. 35 For I was hungry, and you fed me. I was thirsty, and you gave me a drink. I was a stranger, and you invited me into your home. 36 I was naked, and you gave me clothing. I was sick, and you cared for me. I was in prison, and you visited me.’
37 “Then these righteous ones will reply, ‘Lord, when did we ever see you hungry and feed you? Or thirsty and give you something to drink? 38 Or a stranger and show you hospitality? Or naked and give you clothing? 39 When did we ever see you sick or in prison and visit you?’
40 “And the King will say, ‘I tell you the truth, when you did it to one of the least of these my brothers and sisters,[f] you were doing it to me!’" Matt 25. It appears these people didn't even know who Jesus was, but did what was required of Christians.

I don't want to seem insensitive because the pain is very real. But the way to ease the pain is finding a greater affection. This is what God offers in Psalm 23. It is possible to be so satisfied in God that other matters seem insignificant.

The church has not changed. The last time I was there, around 2005, the Singles group was a mix of married and singles. They were now a no dating singles group. I checked the church web site recently and the Singles groups was still a mix of married and singles. That is not good.

But forget about this church John ! This is maybe what you need to do. Forgive and move on.
There is life outside of that church who has ruined your relationship with a potential wife. Just look at other places and cultures.

You've brought this to mind.



More seriously, it's true that most of the prophets & apostles had very difficult lives. In many cases their earthly lives would have been more comfortable for them if they had not served God.

Have you ever read the book of Habakkuk? Habakkuk prays to God and God remains silent for some time. And then when God finally answers, God's answer seems stranger than his silence. Habakkuk begins questioning and complaining.
But in chapter 2 he begins listening and learning. In the end he begins praising and worshipping even though his situation doesn't become better but worse.
It might prove worthwhile for you to learn what Habakkuk learned. I hope will take the time to find out.