Grace and Peace

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ChrisTillinen

Active member
Sep 16, 2022
354
184
43
#1
1.
Lord everlasting
giver of life
so merciful.

May you now grant us
your grace and peace
so plentiful.

2.
You veiled your glory
came down to die so
that we may live.

No power of our own
it is our weakness
that we now give.

3.
In weakness of our hearts
let not our greed
rule what we do.

And remind us that
when meeting ones in need
we just met you.

4.
Warmth of our passion
let now grow into
what you deem good.

We are the branches
now grafted into
tree bearing fruit.

5.
Sands are thrifting
torrents are blind
as time flees.

In your gifting
grace us to find
your way of peace.
 

ChrisTillinen

Active member
Sep 16, 2022
354
184
43
#2
Should have been "Sands are drifting", not "thrifting". :D I wonder if the person approving the thread could edit it as it's still pending approval. (EDIT: Apparently not. Oh well, at least I have the excuse of English as a second language.)
 

ChrisTillinen

Active member
Sep 16, 2022
354
184
43
#3
There are also a couple of formatting issues that I spotted. That 5-minute limit on editing is not so great (in my opinion). But I guess I should have just been more careful when posting first. :unsure:
 

ebdesroches

Well-known member
Aug 20, 2022
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495
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#4
No you cant use English as a second language as excuse! The use of the words and the high skill of choosing the words and intelligence betrays you!
 

ChrisTillinen

Active member
Sep 16, 2022
354
184
43
#5
No you cant use English as a second language as excuse! The use of the words and the high skill of choosing the words and intelligence betrays you!
OK, thanks for ruining my excuse. :p

Anyway, I tried to make this one much simpler with the aim of possibly making it a song at some point. Many of my poems may be a bit too complex for that. I did even come up with a very simple melody that might work. But I think I'll keep it under development as I'm not anywhere near confident enough in my musical skills just yet.
 

ebdesroches

Well-known member
Aug 20, 2022
976
495
63
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#6
Try it, try it!

I have a background in music but i would not bet on my skills.

I agree with you simple verses!

You can use a midi keyboard and interface with your computer to enter the music more easily i Musescore.

I want to hear it!

I am working towards writting to lyrics but is a struggle…my laziness kicks in. Also i don’t know if i can do anything worthwhile. The poems i do i don’t know if worth it but i write them anyway. I consume them myself. I claim to be a coauthor.
 

ebdesroches

Well-known member
Aug 20, 2022
976
495
63
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#7
Here is what my friend said that led to the rely above;:

I read Song of Solomon again recently, and it has a lot of the same sentiments as your poem. Must be the same Holy Spirit.
 

ebdesroches

Well-known member
Aug 20, 2022
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495
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#8
Sorry i pasted this on the wrong thread
 

ChrisTillinen

Active member
Sep 16, 2022
354
184
43
#9
I agree with you simple verses!
However, I'm afraid the more complex stuff isn't going anywhere anytime soon. The poem that I'm currently working on is definitely on the complex side, and while I think there is a lot of meaning that can be gained from it with reasonably little effort, there will be a kind of "gem" hidden before the surface. (If it in fact turns out to be a gem rather than a poor replica of my own making, which seems equally possible. But more on that later.)
 

ebdesroches

Well-known member
Aug 20, 2022
976
495
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#10
Hidden or not you likely will read it many times and enjoy it because you are not the only one writing it.
 

ebdesroches

Well-known member
Aug 20, 2022
976
495
63
76
#11
The poem you wrote is very good
Full of images from the scriptures
It definitely is easier to understand
Of course i like it!