A question about adultery

  • Christian Chat is a moderated online Christian community allowing Christians around the world to fellowship with each other in real time chat via webcam, voice, and text, with the Christian Chat app. You can also start or participate in a Bible-based discussion here in the Christian Chat Forums, where members can also share with each other their own videos, pictures, or favorite Christian music.

    If you are a Christian and need encouragement and fellowship, we're here for you! If you are not a Christian but interested in knowing more about Jesus our Lord, you're also welcome! Want to know what the Bible says, and how you can apply it to your life? Join us!

    To make new Christian friends now around the world, click here to join Christian Chat.

JohnB

Well-known member
Jul 31, 2022
2,078
456
83
Calif
#1
The law says the punishment for adultery is death. Moses gave reasons for divorce and remarriage. Jesus said "It was because of the hardiness of your hearts" Jesus called divorce and remarriage adultery, but never called for any punishment. Are there different types of adultery. It seems the two are treated differently.
 

Gideon300

Well-known member
Mar 18, 2021
5,368
3,163
113
#2
The law says the punishment for adultery is death. Moses gave reasons for divorce and remarriage. Jesus said "It was because of the hardiness of your hearts" Jesus called divorce and remarriage adultery, but never called for any punishment. Are there different types of adultery. It seems the two are treated differently.
There are not different kinds of adultery. It is fascinating to me that by the time of King David, it seemed that at least some of the penalties for breaking the Law were not enforced. David should have been killed for two crimes, adultery and murder. Yet God let him escape. Even in the OT, mercy prevailed over justice. And it was Bathsheba's son who ascended to the throne.

Having said all that, God also knows the motivations of the heart. The true hardliners say that the divorced should never remarry. I do not believe that God punishes the innocent along with the guilty. And adultery is not the unforgiveable sin. What man has never looked at a woman without lust? Not all women are innocent in this regard either, especially in the western world.

It's a vexed issue that I know too well myself. I was divorced in 1995 and I remarried last year. It helps to remember that God forgets when He forgives. That is not a licence to sin, but it is grace to get our lives back on the right track. Hopefully, we learn from our failures and so do not repeat them.
 

gb9

Senior Member
Jan 18, 2011
12,329
6,696
113
#3
The law says the punishment for adultery is death. Moses gave reasons for divorce and remarriage. Jesus said "It was because of the hardiness of your hearts" Jesus called divorce and remarriage adultery, but never called for any punishment. Are there different types of adultery. It seems the two are treated differently.
Jesus also said " if you look at a women with lust in your eye you have committed adultery in your heart".

takes things to a different level....
 

MsMediator

Well-known member
Mar 8, 2022
1,101
739
113
#4
It helps to remember that God forgets when He forgives.
I do not believe God forgets as He is all-knowing, though He does forgive and may wipe our slate clean. Some sins are written down for everyone to know forever (until the end of this world) such as David's sin and the adulterous woman in the NT. If we regress, I would not be surprised if God brings up the old sins.
 

JohnB

Well-known member
Jul 31, 2022
2,078
456
83
Calif
#5
There are not different kinds of adultery. It is fascinating to me that by the time of King David, it seemed that at least some of the penalties for breaking the Law were not enforced. David should have been killed for two crimes, adultery and murder. Yet God let him escape. Even in the OT, mercy prevailed over justice. And it was Bathsheba's son who ascended to the throne.

Having said all that, God also knows the motivations of the heart. The true hardliners say that the divorced should never remarry. I do not believe that God punishes the innocent along with the guilty. And adultery is not the unforgiveable sin. What man has never looked at a woman without lust? Not all women are innocent in this regard either, especially in the western world.

It's a vexed issue that I know too well myself. I was divorced in 1995 and I remarried last year. It helps to remember that God forgets when He forgives. That is not a licence to sin, but it is grace to get our lives back on the right track. Hopefully, we learn from our failures and so do not repeat them.
How would that fit in with 'Or do you not know that wrongdoers will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor men who have sex with men" 1 Corinthians 6:9

Not trying to condemn anyone, but there seems to be exceptions. The same applies to fornication and other issues.
 

JohnB

Well-known member
Jul 31, 2022
2,078
456
83
Calif
#6
Jesus also said " if you look at a women with lust in your eye you have committed adultery in your heart".

takes things to a different level....
He was talking about a married woman. The Greek word for woman, is the same for single or married. it depends on context.
 

timemeddler

Active member
Jul 13, 2023
449
201
43
#7
How would that fit in with 'Or do you not know that wrongdoers will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor men who have sex with men" 1 Corinthians 6:9

Not trying to condemn anyone, but there seems to be exceptions. The same applies to fornication and other issues.
that's a general list of behaviors that people who aren't going to heaven tend to exhibit, not a do it once or twice and your out. moses was a murderer and david an adulterer both were counted as righteous according to the list in Hebrews,
 

timemeddler

Active member
Jul 13, 2023
449
201
43
#8
grace and the state of the persons heart are where it counts.
 

MsMediator

Well-known member
Mar 8, 2022
1,101
739
113
#9
The law says the punishment for adultery is death. Moses gave reasons for divorce and remarriage. Jesus said "It was because of the hardiness of your hearts" Jesus called divorce and remarriage adultery, but never called for any punishment. Are there different types of adultery. It seems the two are treated differently.
Moses probably did not intend a man may divorce his wife for any reason, however his instructions were abused such that men were easily able to divorce their wives over silly reasons. It is this Jesus was likely referring to when He said "hardness of your hearts".

"If a man marries a woman who becomes displeasing to him because he finds something indecent about her, and he writes her a certificate of divorce, gives it to her and sends her from his house, and if after she leaves his house she becomes the wife of another man, and her second husband dislikes her and writes her a certificate of divorce, gives it to her and sends her from his house, or if he dies, then her first husband, who divorced her, is not allowed to marry her again after she has been defiled. That would be detestable in the eyes of the Lord. Do not bring sin upon the land the Lord your God is giving you as an inheritance" (Deuteronomy 24:1-4 ).

In the Old Testament, ancestry and genealogy (the Jewish bloodline) mattered because the Jews were God's chosen/favored people. Adultery could mess up bloodlines etc., not only through outsiders but also amongst the Jews as there were different clans. In addition to the sin of adultery itself, messing up bloodlines probably called for the death penalty. However, ancestry and genealogy do not matter much (or at all) in the New Testament, which kind of follows no physical punishment for adultery including remarriage adultery. Adultery is still serious nonetheless, even allowing for divorce, and considered a sin. However, no physical punishment is required for the physical act. God cares more about our mind/heart in the New Testament (thus, adultery of the heart). If we applied the physical punishment, most everyone would be punished.
 

JohnB

Well-known member
Jul 31, 2022
2,078
456
83
Calif
#10
that's a general list of behaviors that people who aren't going to heaven tend to exhibit, not a do it once or twice and your out. moses was a murderer and david an adulterer both were counted as righteous according to the list in Hebrews,
I met a couple of women in church who were married 5 times. Each marriage was shorter than the previous. Not ones I would marry.
 

Cameron143

Well-known member
Mar 1, 2022
19,319
6,647
113
62
#11
How would that fit in with 'Or do you not know that wrongdoers will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor men who have sex with men" 1 Corinthians 6:9

Not trying to condemn anyone, but there seems to be exceptions. The same applies to fornication and other issues.
I think this refers to those who live in those lifestyles and commit such sins habitually without remorse or repentance.
 

timemeddler

Active member
Jul 13, 2023
449
201
43
#12
I met a couple of women in church who were married 5 times. Each marriage was shorter than the previous. Not ones I would marry.
not the best behavior to run one's life by definitely, but as for the original question, the only exception in the bible I know of is for martial unfaithfulness, and as I understand it it more case of "Divorce is allowed, but you shouldn't remarry afterwards while your old spouse lives."
 

timemeddler

Active member
Jul 13, 2023
449
201
43
#13
here something else I found, a potential exception 1 cornithians 7:15 But if the unbelieving partner separates, let it be so. In such cases the brother or sister is not enslaved. God has called you2 to peace.

So if your married to an unbeliever and he/she divorces you you can remarry, but not if you divorce her? I think that's what it means.
 

JohnB

Well-known member
Jul 31, 2022
2,078
456
83
Calif
#14
not the best behavior to run one's life by definitely, but as for the original question, the only exception in the bible I know of is for martial unfaithfulness, and as I understand it it more case of "Divorce is allowed, but you shouldn't remarry afterwards while your old spouse lives."
All 5 were still alive.
 

JohnB

Well-known member
Jul 31, 2022
2,078
456
83
Calif
#15
This is why I find this interesting “If a man seduces a virgin who is not betrothed and lies with her, he shall give the bride-price for her and make her his wife. If her father utterly refuses to give her to him, he shall pay money equal to the bride-price for virgins." Exodus 22:16-17

or

“Suppose a man has intercourse with a young woman who is a virgin but is not engaged to be married. If they are discovered, (note the clause) he shall pay her father fifty shekels of silver. He must marry the young woman, for he has violated her. He can never divorce her as long as he lives. Deuteronomy 22:28-29

Interesting the bible does not come down hard on fornication, unless it's your life style. I wish the bible was more clear on issues.
 

MsMediator

Well-known member
Mar 8, 2022
1,101
739
113
#16
This is why I find this interesting “If a man seduces a virgin who is not betrothed and lies with her, he shall give the bride-price for her and make her his wife. If her father utterly refuses to give her to him, he shall pay money equal to the bride-price for virgins." Exodus 22:16-17

or

“Suppose a man has intercourse with a young woman who is a virgin but is not engaged to be married. If they are discovered, (note the clause) he shall pay her father fifty shekels of silver. He must marry the young woman, for he has violated her. He can never divorce her as long as he lives. Deuteronomy 22:28-29

Interesting the bible does not come down hard on fornication, unless it's your life style. I wish the bible was more clear on issues.
Agree. I think this speaks to the heaviness/power of temptation. Married couples already have eachother, so they have no excuse to fornicate/commit adultery, so the punishment is greater. Women were also viewed more as property back then, so stealing another man's wife or a runaway wife (or similarly, a runaway slave) carries heavy punishment. Logically speaking, a man and woman can only fornicate once in their life, the next step is marriage (unless the father disagrees). After that, it is adultery.
 

JohnB

Well-known member
Jul 31, 2022
2,078
456
83
Calif
#17
Agree. I think this speaks to the heaviness/power of temptation. Married couples already have eachother, so they have no excuse to fornicate/commit adultery, so the punishment is greater. Women were also viewed more as property back then, so stealing another man's wife or a runaway wife (or similarly, a runaway slave) carries heavy punishment. Logically speaking, a man and woman can only fornicate once in their life, the next step is marriage (unless the father disagrees). After that, it is adultery.
There is no mention if it only happens once. I could see if the man was living with the woman and did not marry her.
 

Gideon300

Well-known member
Mar 18, 2021
5,368
3,163
113
#19
How would that fit in with 'Or do you not know that wrongdoers will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral nor idolaters nor adulterers nor men who have sex with men" 1 Corinthians 6:9

Not trying to condemn anyone, but there seems to be exceptions. The same applies to fornication and other issues.
Jesus said to the adulteress, go and sin no more. There is a difference between a sinful act and a sinful lifestyle. What Christian is totally innocent of offences stated in 1 Corinthians 6:9? I've made a false claim on my tax return a few times, until I realised that it was sin. I idolised my children. I did not realise this until my marriage broke up and I did not see them for 15 years. Paul is warning those who think that we are forgiven so it's ok to sin. Sin does not prevent us going to heaven. That is settled the moment that we are born again. If we choose to live in sin, that disqualifies us from the Kingdom of God.

God does not expect us to be instantly perfect. He does want us to choose to be free and clean. As we seek that freedom, He will bring it to pass. It can be a painful process and it will take a lifetime. Holiness perfection is not available in this lifetime. However, we should be different after 20 years or so. If we are unchanged, it is time to do some soul searching.
 

Gideon300

Well-known member
Mar 18, 2021
5,368
3,163
113
#20
I do not believe God forgets as He is all-knowing, though He does forgive and may wipe our slate clean. Some sins are written down for everyone to know forever (until the end of this world) such as David's sin and the adulterous woman in the NT. If we regress, I would not be surprised if God brings up the old sins.
Look up Hebrews 8:12. It is not God who brings up our sins. Satan is the accuser of the brethren. God not only "may" wipe the slate clean, He does in reality. We are not living in the OT. The blood of Christ removes sin as if it never happened.

That does not mean that there are no consequences to sin. If someone robs a bank, Christian or not, they are likely to end up in prison. The principle of sowing and reaping still applies. The only time God holds us to account is if we refuse to forgive another who has offended us.