Being "nice"

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Big brother ... or are you a sister. Sorry @Delvianna I kind of assumed you were female cos your avatar has a lioness on it.
 
So...should everyone just enrol in bootcamp?

Never been, probably would be beat up or bullied in it for not conforming or doing what I'm told to do. I don't take orders that well from people, I could never be a soldier.

Maybe one day I'll learn to shoot a gun in a parallel universe?
 
Lanolin said:
I never really got the 'bless your heart' thing Southerners in the US say to each other when they don't like each other lol
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Because it sounds nice but is genuinely evil....
we don't want to get caught being evil....
like we don't repeat gossip....you gotta listen close the first time we telling it.
Its a euphamism....
Scriptures are full of euphamisms. Hebrew language itself has no bad words in it....you can't call someone a bad name. All the bad title names that you see in scripture in the Old Testament are created out of euphamisms. For example a homosexual or homosexual prostitute is said to be a "dog" .

So....when we say "Bless his heart" we are genuinely saying "he is so stupid". It may not be as mean as you might believe either...God looks out for babes and fools....
 
Lanolin said:
Big brother ... or are you a sister. Sorry @Delvianna I kind of assumed you were female cos your avatar has a lioness on it.
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Sister, lol you were correct in your assumption. He took the correction very well. He was appreciative and knew I just want what's best for him. We aren't super close, so I didn't pry anymore than just handing it to him and said I don't need a response.
 
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Delvianna said:
I'm not saying it's bad, my point was in certain context and circumstances, it's okay to be blunt or direct.

Here's an example: Say someone is taking scripture out of context and leading others astray to the point you can see it's pulling people away from Christ, not towards Him. You do not have to go up to him and kindly tell him to stop preaching his message. You are allowed to go up, bluntly tell him he's taking scripture out of context and it's sending people to hell. And doing so, doesn't make you less of a Christian, just because you delivered the message in a blunt manner.

Another example: Someone is having an affair that you recently found out about. You do not have to go up to them and calmly tell them how they're doing wrong and God doesn't like it, and sugar coat it that God just loves them. You can 100% go up to them and tell them that they're leading themselves to their destruction and they need to stop before God force corrects. Again, not less of a Christian for doing so.

Both are correcting in love. Love can be blunt. Love can be direct, and it doesn't have to be "nice".
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Okay, so how is "nice" different from gracious and kind? We're instructed to be kind and gracious, why not nice?
 
The first example I don't know of any occasion anyones done that to a preacher...interrupted his sermon to tell him he's wrong, but then I don't know maybe after he's finished and having a cup of tea and small talk with everyone at the church I suppose?

I mean what is the context of this example?

If it's just a bible discussion such as we are having now on these forums nobody's actually PREACHING but just discussing the Bible and having different perspectives/views/interpretations on it. If it was like a seminar in Bible school maybe but people are still learning...and maybe it's encouraged to explore the holes in some peoples understanding of doctrine IDK.

Doesn't the minister/preacher of any church actually need to be accountable to the elders of that church? They can't all be 'nice' to him but anyway don't they need to be ordained first and maybe a bit educated and know the gospel inside out BEFORE they start preaching???
 
ResidentAlien said:
Okay, so how is "nice" different from gracious and kind? We're instructed to be kind and gracious, why not nice?
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In certain circumstances. Same idea when Christ told his followers to sell their cloak and buy a sword. I'm not saying we do away with nice, I'm saying in some circumstances, we are allowed to not be.
 
Lanolin said:
The first example I don't know of any occasion anyones done that to a preacher...interrupted his sermon to tell him he's wrong, but then I don't know maybe after he's finished and having a cup of tea and small talk with everyone at the church I suppose?

I mean what is the context of this example?

If it's just a bible discussion such as we are having now on these forums nobody's actually PREACHING but just discussing the Bible and having different perspectives/views/interpretations on it. If it was like a seminar in Bible school maybe but people are still learning...and maybe it's encouraged to explore the holes in some peoples understanding of doctrine IDK.

Doesn't the minister/preacher of any church actually need to be accountable to the elders of that church? They can't all be 'nice' to him but anyway don't they need to be ordained first and maybe a bit educated and know the gospel inside out BEFORE they start preaching???
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You don't have to interrupt, but you can go up to the preacher afterwards and speak. Or if you encounter a street preacher or people on these forums. There are also "sermons" that people post on these forums, its not all just discussion.

And remember, an ordained minister is just someone who has got their doctrine from someone else. That doesn't mean they are automatically correct in what they are preaching. There are pastors who have admitted, they became a pastor because of the money and influence and don't even believe what they preach. There are WOLVES among the flock... Discernment is highly needed.
 
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Delvianna said:
I wanted to bring up this topic because I've noticed that in today's day and age, people tend to push this 1 idea that every Christian is supposed to just be sugary nice. If you aren't nice, they say "that's not being loving as scripture tells us to be". But "nice" is subjective as literally anyone can get offended for any reason and say you aren't "nice". But if not being "nice" is a sin, then that pulls into question Christ's behavior.

1) He publicly called religious leaders hypocrites, fools, blind guides, snakes and whitewashed tombs.
2) He overturned tables and drove merchants out of the temple.
3) He called Peter Satan.
4) He called Herod a fox.
5) He told people their father was the Devil.
6) He told His disciples they were faithless and spiritually dull.
7) He confronted the Pharisees despite knowing they were offended.
8) He told a possible follower to let the dead bury their dead when asked permission to bury their father first before following Him.

There's a lot more but those are a few examples. People tend to argue "but that's God! He's allowed to do those things!" Yeah, and we are supposed to imitate God. I'm not saying that it condones going around and treating people poorly, but context says in situations and circumstances, just because someone isn't sugary sweet, doesn't mean automatically they're being un-Christian.

Be angry, but don't sin. You can be direct or even blunt! It doesn't make you less of a Christian for doing so. Again, otherwise God is teaching a double standard and that's not the case.
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He alao said a few things!

Matthew 11:29
Take my yoke upon you, and learn ofme; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest unto your souls.

Luke 6:31
And as ye would that men should doto you, do ye also to them likewise.

(the golden rule)

and

1 cor 13:13 three are eternal faith, hope, charity, these three; but the greatest of these is charity.

1 Peter 4:8
And above all things have fervent charity among yourselves: for charity shall cover the multitude of sins.

pride pressure & arrogance are not Christian virtues!

thks
 
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Being a Christian doesn't mean we become a doormat; but I think we have to be very careful about tossing out nice and being "blunt" when we think the circumstances allow us. First, we might be wrong; it might just be the flesh doing what it wants us to do. Second, the fruit of the Spirit is patience, kindness, goodness and self-control. If a person sticks with those they can't go wrong.
 
ResidentAlien said:
Being a Christian doesn't mean we become a doormat; but I think we have to be very careful about tossing out nice and being "blunt" when we think the circumstances allow us. First, we might be wrong; it might just be the flesh doing what it wants us to do. Second, the fruit of the Spirit is patience, kindness, goodness and self-control. If a person sticks with those they can't go wrong.
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Bluntness....of course...and MANNERS!

you know...because just the other morning I had made a breakfast in bed....
And I was expecting to hear things like "thank you" or "oh how wonderful "
Instead all I got was, "WHO ARE YOU? WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE?" And a lot of other things like that about how they were gonna call the police and etc....

And i was just thinking "how rude and inconsiderate of them to act that way"

Some people's children.....
 
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