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Should I kill myself and just hope for the best? Or? Why am I alive? Why was I born stupid and evil and broken and helpless and unloved and why won't any of the basic Christian platitudes of God fixing this awful murderous hell someday actually comfort me, here, in hell, waiting for something...

Hi, I believe in Jesus but I don't feel loved by or any love for God or my neighbors. We're all screwed and it's God's fault for making awful creatures like humans in the first place as far as I can tell. I didn't ask for an innocent miracle worker to get murdered for my sins, I want to be...