A time to realize

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NoahsDad

Senior Member
Oct 30, 2006
594
6
0
#1
I wasnt braught up in church,in fact i was as far from it as you could get.
My mom studied witchcraft ouiji boards and such.My first record was Black Sabbath .In the 1980's it was socially acceptable in some circles to be satan worshipers,In short I was one of the first goths,doing vampier stuff and the like.I lived with a high priestess of a pagan wicca cult for a while and got sucked in for many years.Drugs and alcohol as well as the "rock-N-Roll life style,playing in dark or black metal bands took me down a spiral that I knew I couldnt hold out for long on.I've always been a "Show me" personality (meaning if you felt like you had a truth Id put it to the test to see if it really worked)So in satanism and demonology as well as wiccaan religions I put them to the test and found out they were a bunch of B/S.........so to speak........
This left me searching,realing in a funk of where do I go to from here? I had nothing to believe in nor noone to show me a different path several thousand unanswered Questions and no hope of geting them answered.
then my mom moved to Ga.Got saved and started her life over again.When I left Nashville I had no Idea of where to go ,so I stopped by to visit my mom on my way through,Found out she got saved and was going to church and Learning! Learning answers to things I wanted the answers to.So a few weeks later it hit me in the middle of the night,I can't figure this stuff out on my own, and being a "show me" person, I got down on my knees and "Told God"(What a laugh)"If you're real show me what I need to know"Show me you're real,and not just made up and why You should be worshiped,instead of something or someone else like say buddah or somebody"Take my life and turn it around".Then I left it at that.Didn't go to church didnt study a bible or even try to change anything myself.I figured if He was real He'd show me.If not I'd move on to something else.
2 Years later my wiccan girlfriend went back to Nashville to her family, I went to Florida......And ended up in jail there.After that stent I decided Fla.wasn't for me ,so I head back to the mountains where I figure I belong.didnt make it back here,on my way back to Tenn.Just out of jail in fla. Im in jail in Ga.Cordiel Ga as a matter of fact.For stealing gas.Spent 2 weeks tryin to get bailed out but had to wait till I got a court hearing cuz I couldnt get a bondsman to bail me out.The whole time I was in there there was a preacher that came every morning at 5am sharp.that was wake up call for breakfast ...While you ate you got preached at.for a while it was an anoyance but after a while I started to listen then I got to where I looked forward to seeing him.Wierd huh?
After geting out of Jail there and geting back here(Tenn) I missed hearing him preach ,So I began studying at 5Am every morning.Not saved yet but looking,looking for those answers,asking the bible in essence God Questions and finding the answers.
Then at 24 I got married to my first wife.Still doing drugs cussin like a sailor ,But studyin that bible,Hahahahaah.Irony is wierd.........Anyhoo,We lived here for a little while.Then I got the Idea to move to Texas with my uncle and stepdad where another uncle lives,Who by the way goes to church,
Started goin to church there.Decided to get saved then.didnt change much,Still smoked pot which I felt was natural and wasnt as bad as coke or meth.HA.it is to laugh,But I was a work in progress, ya know?
God still showing me things in His word Growing me slowly teaching me through examples and life.
At 26 my wife left me, over my band, she said i loved my music more than her.But she didnt understand the deal I made with God.I told Him if He'd teach me to play as good as I possibly could be,Id use it for His glory.And I meant I was gunna do it to the best of my ability,unfortunatly I hadn't studied much on covenants or what it meant to be married.So I royally messed that up......of corse her dating bikers and strippin for aliving didnt help matters much either....eeewwwwa
After my divorce I figured that I should learn what marriage was all about,other than coexisting,
I asked God to explain to me where i went arye ,so to speak,And He did,In my solitude, alone ,suffering from codependancy issues,God showed me that too.He went to work on me,Pot smokin went away I didnt try to quit I just didnt want it anymore.Cussin went away ,Again I didnt try to quit it just didnt come out anymore,didnt sound natural coming out of my mouth,so it went away.
1 year later I was introduced to NoahsMom(Lori) by my sister who worked with her.The best gift I have ever been given.God truely is Real!!!!!!!!He's shown me over and over and over from the time in my moms livingroom floor at 19 years old, kneeling looking for answers, He's shown me every answer I have ever asked.And then some!!!!!
So in reflecting back God gave me a time to realize. Realize thet change for some(I said for some)doesnt come automatically.Its a slow growing process a time to get rooted and an effort on their part to be persistant in that persuit of answers and questions.Just like Jscob said to God in Gen 28:20 And Jacob vowed a vow, saying, If God will be with me, and will keep me in this way that I go, and will give me bread to eat, and raiment to put on,
Gen 28:21 So that I come again to my father's house in peace; then shall the LORD be my God:
His transformation wasn't all together one day then its done.As I recall he ended up with a permanent limp from wrestling with God over a blessing.
But still today at 41 I'm still a work in progress.I dont know if we ever stop learning or growing.I figure if we ever stop growing we die just like trees we wither up and fall.So I'll contenue till the Lord returns I hope
HOLLA
 
D

DavidE

Guest
#2
Thank you for taking the time to write your story. I am (in a way) the same as you were...Finally at 35 wondering why I am who I am, what am I really doing in life, why, why, why....

I have met a woman that is a true Christian, and to be honest, I didn't know what that meant. (I knew she went to church...but she never mentioned that she's Catholic, Protestant, Lutheran....so i wasn't sure what being a Christian meant) <-- again....my lack of knowledge. What I've done to her and our relationship because of what I now know are my "sins"...I'm discusted about it, discusted in myself.

Your life story shows me that there is an answer to my own issues in life. Most deal with sins. I've read on here a "passage" (?) about sin and it's stuck with me....it went something like "I want to do good, but don't; I want to not sin, but I do...." But here is where I'm at...I can now see, like a light bulb went on, that I do sin....but what do I do now?

Anyway....I wanted to say thank you for taking the time. I'm looking for answers to questions that I don't even have yet, but I'm interested in learning. I want more for my life than where it is going. "she" told me in more words than this...but this is what I heard...

"Dave, you are always going to get what you always got, because you are going to do what you've always done"....and that hit home; she was right. I want more than what I've always got, and I see that what I've always done is NOT what I want to keep doing.

the end (of my wrambling)
 
D

dutchpuppy

Guest
#3
Noah'sDad,
I really appreciate you sharing your testimony! You've certainly been through a lot! We're all works in progress, aren't we? I know I've got a long way to go!
-----Dutch
 

NoahsDad

Senior Member
Oct 30, 2006
594
6
0
#4
Thanx fo the input and comments guyz
 
S

snowangel

Guest
#5
Thanks for sharing your testimony....may He continue to bless your walk and use you....
thanks,
snow
 
N

NazariteNation

Guest
#6
I wasnt braught up in church,in fact i was as far from it as you could get.
My mom studied witchcraft ouiji boards and such.My first record was Black Sabbath .In the 1980's it was socially acceptable in some circles to be satan worshipers,In short I was one of the first goths,doing vampier stuff and the like.I lived with a high priestess of a pagan wicca cult for a while and got sucked in for many years.Drugs and alcohol as well as the "rock-N-Roll life style,playing in dark or black metal bands took me down a spiral that I knew I couldnt hold out for long on.I've always been a "Show me" personality (meaning if you felt like you had a truth Id put it to the test to see if it really worked)So in satanism and demonology as well as wiccaan religions I put them to the test and found out they were a bunch of B/S.........so to speak........
This left me searching,realing in a funk of where do I go to from here? I had nothing to believe in nor noone to show me a different path several thousand unanswered Questions and no hope of geting them answered.
then my mom moved to Ga.Got saved and started her life over again.When I left Nashville I had no Idea of where to go ,so I stopped by to visit my mom on my way through,Found out she got saved and was going to church and Learning! Learning answers to things I wanted the answers to.So a few weeks later it hit me in the middle of the night,I can't figure this stuff out on my own, and being a "show me" person, I got down on my knees and "Told God"(What a laugh)"If you're real show me what I need to know"Show me you're real,and not just made up and why You should be worshiped,instead of something or someone else like say buddah or somebody"Take my life and turn it around".Then I left it at that.Didn't go to church didnt study a bible or even try to change anything myself.I figured if He was real He'd show me.If not I'd move on to something else.
2 Years later my wiccan girlfriend went back to Nashville to her family, I went to Florida......And ended up in jail there.After that stent I decided Fla.wasn't for me ,so I head back to the mountains where I figure I belong.didnt make it back here,on my way back to Tenn.Just out of jail in fla. Im in jail in Ga.Cordiel Ga as a matter of fact.For stealing gas.Spent 2 weeks tryin to get bailed out but had to wait till I got a court hearing cuz I couldnt get a bondsman to bail me out.The whole time I was in there there was a preacher that came every morning at 5am sharp.that was wake up call for breakfast ...While you ate you got preached at.for a while it was an anoyance but after a while I started to listen then I got to where I looked forward to seeing him.Wierd huh?
After geting out of Jail there and geting back here(Tenn) I missed hearing him preach ,So I began studying at 5Am every morning.Not saved yet but looking,looking for those answers,asking the bible in essence God Questions and finding the answers.
Then at 24 I got married to my first wife.Still doing drugs cussin like a sailor ,But studyin that bible,Hahahahaah.Irony is wierd.........Anyhoo,We lived here for a little while.Then I got the Idea to move to Texas with my uncle and stepdad where another uncle lives,Who by the way goes to church,
Started goin to church there.Decided to get saved then.didnt change much,Still smoked pot which I felt was natural and wasnt as bad as coke or meth.HA.it is to laugh,But I was a work in progress, ya know?
God still showing me things in His word Growing me slowly teaching me through examples and life.
At 26 my wife left me, over my band, she said i loved my music more than her.But she didnt understand the deal I made with God.I told Him if He'd teach me to play as good as I possibly could be,Id use it for His glory.And I meant I was gunna do it to the best of my ability,unfortunatly I hadn't studied much on covenants or what it meant to be married.So I royally messed that up......of corse her dating bikers and strippin for aliving didnt help matters much either....eeewwwwa
After my divorce I figured that I should learn what marriage was all about,other than coexisting,
I asked God to explain to me where i went arye ,so to speak,And He did,In my solitude, alone ,suffering from codependancy issues,God showed me that too.He went to work on me,Pot smokin went away I didnt try to quit I just didnt want it anymore.Cussin went away ,Again I didnt try to quit it just didnt come out anymore,didnt sound natural coming out of my mouth,so it went away.
1 year later I was introduced to NoahsMom(Lori) by my sister who worked with her.The best gift I have ever been given.God truely is Real!!!!!!!!He's shown me over and over and over from the time in my moms livingroom floor at 19 years old, kneeling looking for answers, He's shown me every answer I have ever asked.And then some!!!!!
So in reflecting back God gave me a time to realize. Realize thet change for some(I said for some)doesnt come automatically.Its a slow growing process a time to get rooted and an effort on their part to be persistant in that persuit of answers and questions.Just like Jscob said to God in Gen 28:20 And Jacob vowed a vow, saying, If God will be with me, and will keep me in this way that I go, and will give me bread to eat, and raiment to put on,
Gen 28:21 So that I come again to my father's house in peace; then shall the LORD be my God:
His transformation wasn't all together one day then its done.As I recall he ended up with a permanent limp from wrestling with God over a blessing.
But still today at 41 I'm still a work in progress.I dont know if we ever stop learning or growing.I figure if we ever stop growing we die just like trees we wither up and fall.So I'll contenue till the Lord returns I hope
HOLLA
Great Testimony NDad. It's comforting to know, in a warped kinda' way, that I'm not the only Prodigal around these parts! *lol* You are very blessed... not many folks venture as deep into "the darkness" as you have with their sanity (not to mention their life) still in tact. The Lord's hand is definitely on your life!
 
N

NoahsMom

Guest
#7
Good thing God got a hold of him for i did......hahahahahaha
 
Aug 27, 2005
1,282
12
38
34
#8
hahahahaha mom!! that's priceless!! thanks dad!!! that is a crazy story! oh my werd u went through some serious stuff! glad u made it out :p Holla!