Christian Singles app

[Lynx]

I'm guessing "you" should have been "him." But that's just a guess.

 

[Levib]

I don’t think there should be a separate app. Mostly because the userbase is unsuitable and you’ll be unable to provide the service people are paying for.

Women are what make a lot of these platforms unprofitable. They all will select one man while disrespecting all the rest. Then complain “all men are the same” when they are actually all dating the same man . The features suggested will subconsciously produce these results. There’s already an app for that.

A lot of behaviors that are considered rude and unacceptable everywhere else are excused as “not wasting my time”. While men should spend days filling out questionnaires and improving their bio, to never get any common decency in return. Anyone so calloused they cannot politely respond to people and say they are not interested, should spend some serious time on self reflection.

Now go ahead, bring the hate. I said what I said. If dating apps were working we wouldn’t be talking about it here.

 

[lina_b]

Hi Robo!

Thank you so much for thinking of Singles! I can only speak from my own experience, but here's what I've learned from being in the Christian single community for a very long time.

1. I would advocate for paid memberships.

I've been on free sites, and when there's nothing to lose, everyone tries -- including a large number of marrieds, which is why I gave up on free sites. I was also on eharmony, Christian Mingle, and Christian Cafe, and while of course, a paid subscription doesn't solve everything, it's at least a first layer of screening. A recent Google stat estimates that 65% of people on dating apps are married or already in relationships.

A fee might cut down the number of marrieds if Mrs. Sally sees a charge on the credit card bill showing that Mr. Sam just paid for a membership to "ChristianSingles.com."

I know this will upset those who believe all things Christian should be free, especially since a dating app will attract a lot of people who can't/don't work, so if they have better ideas for how to help keep the community safe, I'm certainly open to other ideas.

And I would be all for some kind of donation fund where those who wanted to could help subsidize memberships for anyone having a rough time and couldn't pay.

2. Enforce some sort of screening process to make people verify who they are through photos.

Catfishing is rampant and a big reason why singles give up on these sites

3. Include live chat rooms.

Mingle and Cafe used to have them -- I don't think they do anymore -- and I wouldn't go back to a site without one.

It was a lot easier to get to know people and/or catch them in lies when they had to talk to people in real time, and in a group.

For instance, there was a guy bantering with me one time I entered Mingle chat and another girl wrote me and said, "Just to let you know, he hits on every new girl who comes in. He likes to throw everything at every wall to see if anything sticks." She also told me that several girls were talking to him, and that he never answered questions about his life.

Now I understand there's a fine line between gossip and being informative -- but I definitely wasn't interested in a player. And I would not have known without the chat.

4. If it's discovered that someone is married or in a relationship, how is that handled?

How does administration handle that? And to what extent are members allowed to let others know? If someone puts in their profile, "BY THE WAY, SALLY H. IS ACTUALLY MARRIED!!" -- how far would that go?

5. No one wants to think about this, but I'm the person who, when presented with an idea, will think of everything that can go wrong.

How will reports of abuse/sexual misconduct, whether in word or deed, be handled?

I once heard of a of a sexual assault on a date from Christian Mingle. I don't know to what extent the victim went to when informing the administration, but I was told the perpetrator's account went on as if nothing happened -- possibly endangering others.

I don't know how things like that would be handled, especially from a legal standpoint.

What if you have the victim trying to warn other people, saying, "USERX37 IS A PREDATOR!" I know cases like this will boil down to "He said, She said," but you can count on things like this happening -- even if it's not physical, but someone saying inappropriate things or sending inappropriate photos.

And what happens when you have people who cross the line into stalking, etc.?


I know not every problem can be prevented, but I do know that with a dating app, these problems are going to occur. It's not a matter of if they will happen, but rather, how big they will become.


Thank you for taking the time to ask for our input!

I would be thrilled to feel there was an option for Singles that was truly concerned about honesty and safety.

A very thought-through response

 

[Dustin240]

If doing a dating app, I do think a quiz should be required before you can look at a profile, like eHarmony does. The most successful matches I've heard of from dating sites have been eHarmony. I think their quiz is a little too long though personally, and I only ever got "flex matches"... That rather deterred me from continuing.

 

[Lanolin]

What sorts of quizzes are these.

I only ever done pub quizzes where half the time I don't know the answers esp the ones about sport. But they a good way to have a fun date and you can be part of a team, instead of interrogating each other about all your personal info.

 

[Dustin240]

What sorts of quizzes are these.

I only ever done pub quizzes where half the time I don't know the answers esp the ones about sport. But they a good way to have a fun date and you can be part of a team, instead of interrogating each other about all your personal info.

Personality quizzes. Help match you to someone who would actually be well-suited to you rather than just someone you think looks cute. Just because someone is Christian, doesn't mean we'll get along. Someone may have an issue with hunting for example. That person would be immediately incompatible with me. I prefer my meat come from wild sources rather than commercial. My last successful hunt was around a year ago... I got a single duck.

 

[Lanolin]

Personality quizzes. Help match you to someone who would actually be well-suited to you rather than just someone you think looks cute. Just because someone is Christian, doesn't mean we'll get along. Someone may have an issue with hunting for example. That person would be immediately incompatible with me. I prefer my meat come from wild sources rather than commercial. My last successful hunt was around a year ago... I got a single duck.

oh ok do you make up the questions or does the site make them?

How many questions is the quiz and how long do they take.
A can only handle maybe 1 and a half hours of pub quiz questions and 8 rounds of them.

I'm going for this job interview and already I have to answer/prepare for at least 20-30 questions about every thing to do with my work history, skills and experience. Its tiring. I find those career quizzes take too long and give you weird jobs.

And then theres the Myers Brigg ones. Well I can already say I am INFP or INFJ and for those that took the quiz. they could go on my thread...except non INFPers went on it and actually insulted us. Saying I was an idiot for taking the test. Whatever!!!

 

[Churchgoer]

Personality quizzes. Help match you to someone who would actually be well-suited to you rather than just someone you think looks cute. Just because someone is Christian, doesn't mean we'll get along. Someone may have an issue with hunting for example. That person would be immediately incompatible with me. I prefer my meat come from wild sources rather than commercial. My last successful hunt was around a year ago... I got a single duck.

I think the sites should let people do their own old fashion selection, not algorithm matching.