P
Psalm2323
Guest
Well at least making small steps towards creating healthy boundaries. I thought because God wanted me to "be still and know He was God" meant I was to say nothing as my husband just basically "threw" his affair in my face. They were texting each other in our home. He was making cds for her and leaving them around the house. He asked me to pick him up another toothbrush so when he packs his bag he can doesn't have to take his toothbrush in and out of his bag.
Well, last night I accidently saw a text message he was sending to her..."Missing uuuuu. I am home. Call me." I was so heartbroken. I don't know why because I already know he was seeing this person. Well, I began to pray and cry out to God and ask Him for clarity and discernment. I believe God lead me to this website about creating healthy boundaries. I realized I have never created healthy boundaries in any of my relationships especially with my husband. As hard as it was for me I found strength and courage to speak to my husband about his behavior.
I told him that he asked for space and I have honored that but I will not compromise my peace of mind and respect for self for his space. I told him that I cannot make his decisions for him but from 6p.m. on his cell should not be in our home. If he wants to communicate with this woman then it would have to be out of our home. I also explained to him that I didn't need him throwing this whatever he has with this woman in my face. Well, he had a tantrum and talked about locking his phone. Which I have no idea what that had to do with what I said, but ... I don't know. Of course I prayed before I did all of this. So, I gave up control over the outcome. Doesn't mean my heart isn't breaking but I feel a little bit more like I have the power my God has given me. Which scares me some because I don't think I ever had it. And I am worried about the retaliation my husband might have for me. But I rest in the fact that whatever harm was meant for me God's good arms have me. Yeah, God has me.
Well, last night I accidently saw a text message he was sending to her..."Missing uuuuu. I am home. Call me." I was so heartbroken. I don't know why because I already know he was seeing this person. Well, I began to pray and cry out to God and ask Him for clarity and discernment. I believe God lead me to this website about creating healthy boundaries. I realized I have never created healthy boundaries in any of my relationships especially with my husband. As hard as it was for me I found strength and courage to speak to my husband about his behavior.
I told him that he asked for space and I have honored that but I will not compromise my peace of mind and respect for self for his space. I told him that I cannot make his decisions for him but from 6p.m. on his cell should not be in our home. If he wants to communicate with this woman then it would have to be out of our home. I also explained to him that I didn't need him throwing this whatever he has with this woman in my face. Well, he had a tantrum and talked about locking his phone. Which I have no idea what that had to do with what I said, but ... I don't know. Of course I prayed before I did all of this. So, I gave up control over the outcome. Doesn't mean my heart isn't breaking but I feel a little bit more like I have the power my God has given me. Which scares me some because I don't think I ever had it. And I am worried about the retaliation my husband might have for me. But I rest in the fact that whatever harm was meant for me God's good arms have me. Yeah, God has me.